I'm Still Standing Here
by Avel
Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo’s life will never be the same. 1x3,6x2 Ch.14 finally updated!
1. Revival

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author:  Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer:  I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings:  1x3 and 11x2  


Everyone knew that he was a loner, he didn't fit in, and that's how it had always been. His violet eyes once vibrant, now remained empty, haunted, and clouded by years of pain and rejection. His teachers never knew what made the youth so perceptible to torments by his peers, but somehow that was always the favorite past time for the 11th grade class of Burmens High School, in L1 colony. He was a reject and was looked down on as a "nobody" amongst the class. What made Duo Maxwell so different from the rest was the simple fact that he was from L2. Quite frankly, he was white trash that had survived what had come to be known as the Maxwell Church Massacre and had found himself being placed in one of the wealthiest colonies, other than L4. He arrived at school each day in a worn black hooded sweater and faded black jeans that were slightly too large for his slender frame. His hair though a glossy chestnut bronze, with light caramel highlights was always covered with a hood, causing suspicions and teasing by a bunch of students. Rumors spread like wildfire around him, encircling him in an endless cycle of lies. However, he had long since given up on caring what others thought about him. He preferred to isolate himself from any and all group activities before the group members had a chance to shun him, causing his participation in classes to weigh heavily down upon him, and his grades suffered for it. Duo was a very bright student, who would have been an A student, had participation not been an essential part of the grading system. His lack of interest in most human interaction and broad understanding of most subjects, wore on the patience of many of his teachers resulting in being singled out and punished. Though it was clear Duo had a different perspective on life, he was about to encounter someone else's tortured existence, one that would change him forever.

"Lets turn to page 362..." the vapid drone of the teacher drew many students to daydream and turn their interests to other topics. It was 11:35 a.m. and the day so far had been going slowly but smoothly. A brief knock at the door caught the attention of everyone in the class, as a tall youth stepped into the classroom a white slip of paper evident in his hand. As he approached the teacher the class studied the new student with some interest. He was tall and extremely thin wearing a faded pair of blue jeans with cuts in the knees, they would have been tight had the boy a waist, but he wasn't scrawny, infact he was well defined. He was wearing a tight tee with cut off sleeves; it was black with 'The Used' in white letters on the front. His lean arms were pure muscle, not bulky, but flattered his image along with his evident washboard stomach. What caught the most attention was his unnaturally parted hair. His hair was of a dark chestnut with red auburn streaks glistened in the sunlight, but what made it peculiar, was that his hair came over one of his eyes, without any sign of hair gel or spray. He had grace and elegance, though it was evident that this young man was most likely from a different colony, or perhaps Earth. Something about the youth was off, but no one could place exactly what it was. The teacher, Mrs. Serton, greeted the young man with a smile as he handed her the transfer notice, and then turned to address the class after reading the note. "Ok, well then, this is Trowa Barton he's our new transfer student from.." she looked expectantly to the young man who politely answered with "Earth, though I could be wrong." The class chuckled at this answer and one boy asked rather loudly "How could you not know where you're from?"

Mrs. Serton gave a harsh look to the class, which quieted down, though humor was evident on their faces. "Would you care to explain, Mr. Barton, what you meant? I'm sorry but this class is right before Lunch so their a little rowdy." Mrs. Serton assured Trowa. Trowa acknowledged the statement with a slight nod and answered, "It's really none of your business, may I have a desk or shall I come back later?" His voice held politeness but his face held annoyance, and Mrs. Serton a bit shocked by Trowa's response told him to take a seat next to Mr. Maxwell. The class snickered at this as Trowa was pointed in the direction of the back of the room, where a seat lay empty and discarded. Stationed next to it was a black hooded figure whose head was buried in his arms, like he was asleep. Trowa noticed the class's reaction, but went to sit down in his new seat while Mrs. Serton came to hand him a set of books and explain where they were and what he should bring and prepare for. Trowa curtly nodded in understanding, content with Trowa's willingness to move right along, Mrs. Serton continued with the class for the next 45 minutes until the release bell rang. While everyone hurried with shoving their class work and pencils into their bags, Trowa noticed that the boy next to him hadn't moved, he would have thought the boy dead, had his back not rise and fall with each intake of breath. It didn't take long to figure out that he had nowhere to go, and was alone in what he considered a strange place. This was his first day of school, actually the first school he had ever attended, and so he felt out of place. He was about to ask the teacher where the cafeteria was located when he noticed that he did have a student to the left of him, which seemed familiar with the place.

"Mind telling me where the cafeteria is?" he asked while tapping the figures shoulder. Silence remained for what seemed like an eternity, figuring the other hadn't heard him he was about to remove the boy's hood when the teacher told him that it was a hopeless case and that she'd escort him. He shook his head and politely said that if she didn't mind that he wouldn't pose a bother on her on his behalf, and so he was left alone with the mysterious youth beside him.

"What's your name?" Trowa asked curiously, this time the figure moved to look at the student that was addressing him, and came face to face with the most beautiful emerald eyes imaginable.

"What'd ya' wanna know that for?" Duo asked, more than a little uncomfortable that this boy was talking to him, acknowledging him.

"So I can talk to you. Was wonderin' if ya' wanna hang out - get lunch" Trowa smiled confidently at the boy as he introduced himself.

"My name's Trowa Barton, by the way." He extended his hand out to the boy who looked wearily at the hand despite the small smile on his face.

"Duo, Duo Maxwell, I know an awesome pizzeria not far from here, we can take my car if you want." Duo stood up and took his hand in a sturdy grip; a look of pure happiness graced his face as he led Trowa out of the classroom and towards the student parking lot.

"So I hear you're from Earth? How could you not be sure? Told ya' this place is fucking sick! I could live here - if only I could." The smile faded slightly, but Duo took another long breath inhaling Diet Coke from the straw he had been playing with.

"I traveled a lot, before... before our group disbanded, Catherine wanted me to get a good education so I passed the transfer tests and wound up here. This is the first school I've been to, its kind of weird I don't know anybody on this colony and I just feel like some jacked up car inside a show room. Well, now I know you so I guess ya can't really say I'm totally alone." He smiled and took another small bite of the greasy extra cheese pizza that had been cooling down.

"Who's Catherine? What, were you like part of a traveling circus? Duo laughed, and saw a mixture of sadness and embarrassment flash across Trowa's face for an instant before quietly admitting that it was true.

"Catherine's my sister, we were a part of a traveling Circus that performed through out all the colonies and Earth, budgets went down so we were forced to shut down, or at least until the manager can find the money to support the troop. They were my family." Trowa stated softly before looking at Duo's face which was ready to burst with laughter, ready to take offense, Duo pointed frantically behind him. Turning Trowa saw a small group of teens around the same age as them looking as if they were going to be jumped if they separated. Indeed the place was dark and a lot of grizzly looking men wearing biker outfits and others looked as if they'd just been released on parole, but other than that he didn't see what was amusing or scary about the situation. Duo swallowed his pizza, gasping and choking for air, "They're from our school, that's Relena Peacecraft! She's the richest bitch at the school, oh, and there's that slut, Dorothy. Boy, are they in the wrong place, I wonder why they're here?"

"Duo? Is that you, oh good, It is." Relena approached the table a smirk plastered on her face, like the light pink lip-gloss on her lips. "Isn't that you're car out there?" She asked in a sickeningly sweet voice. Both Trowa and Duo looked out the window to see Duo's now trashed 1998 Chevrolet Camaro Z28. Duo looked at his car and then back at Relena's innocent face and back.

"You did that to my car!" Trowa said in a shocked voice, looking at the girl with pure shock.

"Your car? That's Duo's everyone knows that scum drives it" The girl looked at Duo suddenly uncertain that the prank worked.

"He sold it to me you bitch, you're paying for it!" Trowa was up in a flash with a yell that shook both Relena and the rest of her party. Duo however just sat there in shock and confusion.

" I hear you're a Peacecraft this shouldn't be that hard to fix, I'm asking one grand or your in for it slut." Trowa growled, though it was way too much money he was always good at getting things he wanted - he had long since given up on his pride.

"What's it gonna' be? I'm waiting." He watched as the girl who looked as if she were in crisis mode looked shakily at her purse and opened it nervously, her hands shook and it took her a while to get the purse open, but in the end she handed Trowa twelve-hundred dollars, 1000 for the car and 200 as hush money, before turning on her heels and fleeing the scene.

"That was easy.'" Trowa smiled at Duo who looked at Trowa as if the young man had sprouted horns, "We'll split it 50/50, you get half and I get half."

"How'd ya do that, why'd ya...sure, thanks." Duo said in a disbelieving tone, "she practically handed you her wallet!"

"It was nothing. She shouldn't have messed with your car, she's lucky I'm such a nice guy."

Trowa took another slice of pizza; his second slice, and bit into before saying that he was full.

"How can you be full? You hardly ate anything" Trowa shrugged, and then said in an odd tone that Catherine wasn't there.

Duo took a look at his car and deemed it salvageable, but complained about having to get a tow truck and their situation on getting back to school on time for their classes. They finally decided on a cab and that after school they'd take Trowa's car and tow it back to Duo's home. The cab ride was more or less uneventful and the boys made plans for where they'd meet up each day and scheduled plans for over the weekend to introduce Trowa around the town. They both arrived at school just before the bell rang and rushed to their classes, money safely in pockets.

A/N: Well here is Part 1 of ISSH, which is a part of my Silent Desperation Arc. I had planned on making this out to be 4 parts, however I actually split my original part one and plan on finishing a bit more at the end and upload it as part 2. Questions? All will be explained in side stories following the fic, I have one side fic in particular that will hopefully clear up that horrible mess of the beginning! I want you all to be aware that I indeed know that I threw these two together much too quickly to be realistic. So look for that, the side stories will be done on a whim, so I honestly don't know when they'll be up, one could be up during the space between part 2 and 3 (depending on if I have 4 parts, otherwise it might get up to 6 parts or higher). Or it they could all be written after the fic is completed, who knows? Remember to review before you leave! x.

-Late


	2. Revelations

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (Haha, last time I put up 11 instead of 6 – tried to figure that one out!)

Friday arrived to find the two teenage boys in Trowa's 2005 Dodge Ram 1500 truck, blasting the radio as they left the school campus. It was around 3:55 pm and Trowa had been bringing Duo to and from school ever since the incident at the pizzeria.

"You wanna' do anything today, I don't have work, whatcha' think?" Duo said looking out the window, his arm casually draped across the open window, allowing a full stream of air to blow in his face.

"Where? I'd have to call...if we go anywhere that is." Trowa looked a little uncomfortable for a second as he realized he still didn't know how Duo would react to him being a homosexual; after all he didn't want to lose his new best friend.

"Anywhere's fine, who'd ya' have to call? Catherine's staying with your manager so its not her...my place is a shit house, you've seen it. Hmm..."Duo sat in thought for a moment before Trowa broke the silence.

"Duo? May I ask what your preferences are?" receiving a blank stare from his confused friend Trowa blushed and restated his question.

"I meant are you into girls or..." Trowa said shyly.

Duo shifted nervously, not liking the odds of him being shunned away from a new friend but remembering his honor code, he let out a sigh and mentally shrugged. What the hell, he thought and glanced over at Trowa to find him waiting for an answer.

"I'm into guys, why? Am I making' you nervous?" Duo asked cautiously but attempting to sound un-phased.

"Not at all, so if you want we can go to my place, my boyfriend wont be home until 5:30pm, we can decide what we're going to do when we get there. That alright with you?" Trowa let a relieved smile cross his face as Duo nodded in agreement.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a boyfriend? So you're staying with him or is he stayin' with you?" Duo asked curiously.

"I'm staying with him, I was originally staying with..." Trowa paled, but continued hastily, "but luckily I met Heero soon after I arrived, he's been nice enough to let me live there without paying rent. He's really nice once you get to know him, though he may seem like a complete bastard at first" Trowa chuckled softly, though his hands were still a bit shaky as he remembered what Wufei had said the night he had ran away. _"You're making a mistake Trowa, I'll find you. And when I do, you'll wish you'd never left, that what we had going was a fucking paradise, compared to what I'll do to you."_

Trowa shuddered involuntarily causing Duo to look at him concerned.

"Are you alright Trowa?" the boy asked vigilantly.

Nodding wearily, Trowa gave a brief nod before turning up to a clean looking apartment building.

"It's a very nice building, very quiet, normally" Trowa smirked at the last word, " C'mon lets go in." Duo looked at the building and then at Trowa.

"You do realize that the people in there will not be to happy that I'm there, just in case you're trying to leave a lasting impression on these people." Duo smiled slyly, "What are we waiting for? Lets go in with a bang." A thud was more like it, Duo hadn't noticed a figure coming from the inside of the apartment so when he swung around his head connected with the door with a loud 'smack' before Duo sunk to the ground clutching his wounded forehead.

"Duo! Are you okay!" Trowa exclaimed over Duo as the figure stood at the door unnoticed by both the braided one and the banged boy.

"Let's get you inside and put some ice on it, I don't think I've ever heard that type of sound the door made when it hit you, can you stand?" Worry evident in the young man's voice, Duo rubbed his forehead and a rushed mantra of 'OW, OW, OW'', tumbled out of the teens mouth. Relieved his friend wasn't too badly injured, Trowa noticed that the person that had opened the door was still standing there. Trowa looked up to find a pair of cobalt blue eyes staring amusedly at the scene before him.

"Heero? What are you doing here?" Trowa smiled brightly at his lover," and how dare you try to murder my friend!" Heero smirked at him, before gazing at the braided boy whose hood had fallen off. Raising an eyebrow at his lover Heero questioned the boy. "If I didn't know better I'd say you were with a girl, but obviously girls around here wouldn't necessarily dress in his attire" He thumbed at Duo's all black get up and offered his hand to Duo. A bit defensive about his braid, Duo accepted the hand before remarking.

"Damn right I'm not a girl, you should see what that one does to those poor souls!" Duo smiled brightly at Trowa, who shrugged in return.

"I take it he's staying for a while?" Heero inquired, eyes focusing on Trowa.

"We're going to hang out here for a while, you busy?" Heero shook his head.

"No, if you two want we can go to 'The Count's' tonight around eight, does that agree with the both of you?" Heero asked bluntly.

"Sure, what do you think Duo?" Trowa turned to address his friend.

"You mean THE Count's Club! You guys can get in!" Duo asked bewildered.

"Of course we can, Hee's friends with the owner." Trowa commented softly.

" You mean I can come? Don't we need ID's?" Duo exclaimed, excited at the opportunity that he may be going to the hottest club in town.

"Zechs put us on the list, you're with us, there won't be a problem." Heero assured in a monotone voice.

"Lets go inside we can watch some TV and get a bite to eat before going" Heero ushered them inside letting the glass door shut with a small thud.

"You really should eat something Tro, before we leave" Heero called from the bedroom where he was currently changing into some casual clothes for the club. They had driven back to Duo's place where he got a change of clothes and then proceeded back to the apartment. To Duo's amazement, Heero was far from being a "bastard", as Trowa had stated earlier. He was actually really sweet with Trowa, very gentle. Duo however noticed that there was something rather off in the way Trowa acted around Heero and when Heero wasn't present. It was almost like Trowa was afraid of what might happen if he did something wrong in Heero's presence. Not accustomed to this behavior, he decided to store that information for later, preferably when they were alone. His train of thought however was broken by the simple fact that Heero suddenly became a god. He hadn't noticed how well defined and handsome Trowa's boyfriend had been, sure he had been wearing a business suit but out of it…Duo felt like drooling. Heero was wearing a cobalt blue collared button up shirt, opened to reveal the young mans six pack abs but closed to cover his stomach. Tight fitted enough to sag in just the right paces making it look unintentional for sex appeal, but enough to emphasize his beautifully sculpted arms. To complete the outfit he wore black slacks that complemented his slender frame, by tightening and revealing his solid rear. However gorgeous he was, one could not miss the fact that he was about to ruin everything by moving towards one of the most hideous pairs of shoes Duo had ever seen in his life.

"Hee? Where are you going?" Trowa stated more than asked, well aware what his lover was planning.

"Shoes." Was all he was awarded with, as he stood and followed his lover to the unsightly scene.

"Those?" Trowa continued, "Are not shoes." Trowa met Heero's eyes and smirked at the frown that graced his lover's face.

"You wear those, then I might do something drastic" Trowa leaned in to whisper something in Heero's ear, receiving a scowl and a blush in return.

"I thought you would agree." Trowa smiled, "go find something black.''

Heero turned scowl still in place as he headed back down the hall to their bedroom.

"I knew he'd see it my way" Trowa smiled at his friend, as he himself started to head to the bedroom to get changed.

"Hey Tro?" Trowa turned to address Duo, "What did ya' tell him?" Duo asked innocently, though his eyes said otherwise.

"Told him I'd go naked'" Trowa replied bluntly as he walked down the hall shutting the bedroom door closed.

Chuckling to himself Duo started to flip through the TV channels in search of something to watch, but was interrupted mid way to the sound of a rather forceful knocking on the door. Unsure as to get it or not, Duo opted to ask, but was stopped short by the fact that knocking had switched to kicking. Heero rushed out of the room and shouted for the person to stop and that he was opening the door. When he did open it Heero was met with an angry looking Chinese man around the same age as Heero by the looks of it, either 19 or in his early twenties.

"Where is he?" The young man snarled, "Where?" he took a step as to enter the apartment but Heero blocked him.

"I don't know what your talking about" Heero stated calmly, though his eyes held a warning.

Ignoring Heero, the Asian man began to yell for Trowa to get out from wherever he was hiding because they were leaving. This in turn enraged Heero who had yet to meet the man that had hurt his lover. This was the man that had kept his lover awake at night screaming, the one who when he had found Trowa had left such severe injuries on the boy that he had to be hospitalized for two weeks. This was Trowa's rapist. This was Wufei.

"You're the one" Heero's voice rained like ice, "that hurt him." Heero was shaking with unrestrained anger.

"You fucking bastard!" Heero gripped the Chinese man's throat quickly as he started to strangle him.

"I'm going to kill you, you sick son of a bitch!" he began to beat the man while he was trying to regain his breath.

"He's not yours!" the Chinese man threw a punch that connected with Heero's jaw.

"He's mine." And with that he broke free and with his parting words he growled "I'll get you back Trowa, you know I will!" Heero would've gone after him but thought it wise to check on Trowa and to explain things to Duo.

"What the hell was that about?" Duo asked a bit shaken up by what had just happened.

"That bastard is Tro's…rapist" Heero cringed at the word, watching as Duo's eyes widened with shock.

"Rapist…" Duo repeated softly, mind going numb at the thought of his best friend being hurt…being forced into…he just couldn't think about that.

"That's the first time I've ever seen Wufei" Heero spoke gently "Tro's not going to be able to trust this place now." Heero looked at the bedroom door that was now closed, he was, ultimately fearing that Trowa wouldn't feel safe with him anymore. It had taken a while to gain Trowa's trust; he didn't want to lose it.

"You're welcome to spend the night here…that is, if you feel comfortable staying here after what just happened…" Heero trailed off looking at the open door and finally walking over to it and closing it. Almost as if by closing it, the demons that constantly haunted his lover, would vanish.

"I'll stay." Duo said quietly, "I don't want Trowa to think that I'd abandon him." He gave a sly smile and winked at Heero, trying to comfort the distraught young man.

"'Sides…" Duo's face darkened," I understand what he went through."

Heero's head shot towards Duo, a look of surprise etched in his facial features.

"I'll go talk to him, you make something for him to eat or drink." Duo stood up from the couch catching Heero's gaze he continued " He's going to want you afterwards, so ya' mind making me a place to sleep?"

Heero smiled softly and nodded, "arigato…thanks."

"No prob." Duo said as he made his way towards the door at the end of the hall, _no problem_ he thought softly, _no problem at all. _

And as his hand touched the doorknob, Duo felt himself cringe as the memories of what had happened so many years ago threatened to overpower him.

A/N: Well here's the end of part 2. I really had hoped to finish more, but I have way too much homework for my honors and AP classes, so yeah. Remember to review! Honestly I don't know if anyone is reading this, it'd be nice to think that somebody out there is, but one can never tell. We're finally getting somewhere in the plot! I had planned on finishing what now will be part 3 and have that be the end of part 2. Damn it! My four-part fic is going to turn out to be a 13 part fic at this rate! Well maybe it'll be good? If I'm going to start writing up parts 3 and 4, I'd like to know that I'm writing it for someone who wants to read it. -x.

-Late


	3. Chance

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Parings: 1x3, 6x2

**Before you read: I want to thank everyone who reviewed, comments will be at the bottom of the A/N.**

When Duo entered the room, he found Trowa sitting on the bed, back turned to him. "We'll go tomorrow, Saturdays more fun anyway", Trowa said softly. Duo walked over to the bed and sat down next to his friend, laying his head on Trowa's shoulder before speaking.

"He's gone."

"He's never gone…he never will be."

"He hurt you."

"…."

"Tro?"

"I deserved it."

Fire burned throughout Duo as he growled venomously.

"You didn't deserve that, no one deserves to be raped and beaten! I can't believe you would say that, how could you have deserved that!"

Duo almost choked on a sob, but managed to suppress it. Watching as Trowa turned towards him, tears glittering in the darkened room, frustration and self-hatred glowed in his eyes, a mixture of pain and sorrow crossed his face.

"You don't understand! He made it clear that I was supposed to be at home by six, that I wasn't allowed to question him, that I couldn't go anywhere without him! I tried, but I was late, I was always late! I tried to please him, I tried!" Trowa sobbed as the overwhelming sense of helplessness and pain overpowered him. He wiped at his eyes trying to brush off the tears, as he let out a sigh of frustration. He swallowed back a lump, the pain in his chest hurt so badly; but the humiliation hurt worse. How did he ever end up like this? Why did he have to be so weak?

"I'm sorry you have to see me like this." He spoke in an unsteady voice.

"You have nothing to be sorry for, he's a sick person…how did he get into the building?."

"He probably asked one of the neighbors, they're elderly and polite…he's actually very gentlemanly when he wants to be, Wufei that is. Did Heero tell you much, or…"

"You don't have to tell me anything, Heero did mention that Wufei was…I want you to know that you can talk to me if you want too. I know that telling you this won't solve anything, but I want you to know I'm here for you."

"It's just so hard…knowing that I could have left him, but for some reason I just couldn't, you saw him – he won't go away. I tried leaving him before, but he lost his temper and….he hurt me. He broke four of my ribs and broke my left arm at the joint. I was afraid of him. He started drinking and everything went down hill from there. Wufei has always been a naturally angry person, however I just chose to ignore the first signs. We met when I first moved to L1 and I know this sounds stupid, but he offered me a place to crash with reasonable rent, so I took him up on it. A week later we started dating, he seemed too good to be true; he was nice and fun to be around, at first."

Trowa paused as he remembered how Wufei had practically changed overnight. How Wufei had started making excuses for Trowa to stay home, cutting him off from social interaction outside their apartment. Unfortunately, Wufei turned violent when Trowa tried to break off their relationship. Wufei set the rules, Trowa could not leave the apartment without his permission, talk back, wear certain clothes, call anyone, or talk to neighbors. He was only allowed to get groceries, but at a timed limit. He was given a 45 minute time period, from 5:15-6:00 pm, he was beaten if he was late. Wufei even restricted how much Trowa could eat. In a weakened state Trowa was easier to control, and to torment both emotionally and physically.

"One day I just couldn't take it, I had to get out of there, away from him. I got up and headed to the bathroom in the hall, opened up the cabinet under the sink and grabbed the spare clothes I had stashed while he was at work and put them on then flushed the toilet. I went downstairs and started to go through his wallet when he caught me. I remember him starting asking me what I was doing, and when I didn't answer he started advancing on me, yelling at me. I had a gut feeling that he was going to kill me, and it honestly scared me. He began beating me, however I fought back. He took a knife from counter and managed to stab me twice in the side and once in the leg. I don't know how I pulled it off but I used the kitchen table as a blockade as I did a half flip over the chair and ran out the door."

"I knew the neighbors would hear the noise, so I played off it. I started screaming "Fire!" trying to get the neighbors out as I took the stairs to the bottom; it managed to delay him until I reached outside the apartment. I was beginning to feel nauseous and sick, but I kept telling myself that if I didn't stop he'd kill me. I was loosing a lot of blood, because my hand was completely drenched in blood from my side. It burned and sent shock waves to my nerves, but as I ran into an alleyway I remember the pain started to cease and I was getting incredibly cold. My entire body was shaking, I didn't realize it at the time, but I was going into shock."

"I don't know when I sat down, but the next thing I knew; I was propped up against the wall behind a garbage can. I guess I realized that I was dying, because I started thinking of Catherine and I guess I felt so lost and scared that I started crying. I tried to stop, but the harder I tried the worse it got. I wanted to scream but I didn't know where Wufei was and I didn't know where I was for that matter. It took me a while to notice that I was losing consciousness, and when I did I started to panic. I know it was weak of me, I was a pathetic mess…I still am."

"I remember thinking that I didn't want to be alone, I didn't want to be alone. It was then I heard someone walking, I heard the thin layer of snow on the sidewalk crunch with each step. I tried to be as quiet as I could, but I was shivering, my teeth chattering loudly. While I tried to take as much air as I possibly could through my mouth. I had been crying so much I couldn't breathe properly. The walking stopped and I remember thinking that it was Wufei, that he had followed me; that somehow he had found me. My stress level reached a breaking point and I let out a chocked sob of defeat."

"Whoever it was started walking towards me and I tried half desperately to move away, my eyes were shut so tightly that I was seeing flashes of red against the blackness. When the person finally spoke, I remember feeling so pitiful – I think I laughed. If I didn't I felt like it. Here I was about to die of blood loss and hypothermia and I thought that seeing thins stranger instead of Wufei was the funniest thing in the fucking world."

Trowa looked at Duo who had been staring at Trowa's wrist, a large scar was evident on his wrist across two of the major connecting veins. Trowa smiled lightly, amused by Duo's reaction.

"That stranger happened to be Heero."

Duo looked up to Trowa's face, eyes locking on to one another.

"I love him. He just doesn't know it." Trowa said softly, but before Duo could disagree, he continued on.

"No, he knows that I'm attached to him, that I enjoy being with him, that I care for him, but he doesn't know I love him. He thinks I don't trust him, and maybe I don't show it physically, but mentally I'm his. Not in a possessive aspect, mind you. Wufei thinks I'm 'his', but I'm not. Believe me, if I thought or saw anything in him that was even remotely close to Wufei, I'd leave him. But I don't see that, and its not just because I'm love struck that I think this. He just doesn't realize that I don't think that I can let him go. I don't want to lose him, if he left me; I don't think I'd survive. That's why I did it."

Trowa nodded to his wrist, watching Duo frown slightly, not quite understanding.

"I can't imagine him leaving me, and I don't like that feeling. I don't want to get too involved because I could never live without him. When I realized this I knew that I'd be the first one to leave. I wouldn't let him get the chance. But it didn't work out that way. A couple days after we moved in Heero caught me in the bathroom; he had come home early. I don't think I've ever seen him that scared before, sure he was probably frightened when he found me in the alleyway, but this time he knew me."

"I know he likes me, but I really think that he just needed someone to care about, he had just recently broke up with his former boyfriend. I don't want to be a replacement, or some toy until he's ready to get back on his feet. You know? I just…I don't know what I want from him, maybe I do­—I do. I know it in my heart, except my brain hasn't caught on to it yet. Pretty boring story isn't it?"

Trowa smiled softly, before stifling a yawn as he looked at his watch it was only 12:25 am, but the emotional rollercoaster he had just experienced; left him feeling a bit exhausted both physically and mentally.

Duo winked at him, before a grin spread across his face.

"That's just an excuse for me to go get Heero isn't it!" Duo chuckled, lightening the mood.

"Well I can't very well ask you to give me a good night kiss" Trowa laughed sarcastically.

"What! I'm offended," Duo brought his hand to his heart in a mock wounded pose, "I'll have you know I'm a pretty damn good, good night kisser!" Duo said as he got up from the bed.

"Duo? We're still going to be friends, right…I mean if you're disgusted, you can just say so—" He was cut off by a light smack on the head.

"No, we've just become mortal evil enemies, and I plan on taking Heero away with me." Duo said a sarcastically, though he held a serious look.

"You're my best friend Tro, nothings going to change that, so stop worrying. You're tired, get some rest and I'll be in the TV room—you two better not snore or I'll have complaints for both of you in the morning!"

He started to leave the room but as his hand turned the doorknob, Trowa interrupted him.

"Thanks, for everything."

A/N: I actually had to split this one up too; Part 4 is getting pretty screwed up so I opted to change it, but not right now. I actually have most of part 4 done, but it just doesn't flow right. I'm okay with this part; I got a bit of Trowa's personality out. As you can now tell, he's a very in depth character – not shallow or wimpy. I hope he came across well; sometimes what I really want portrayed doesn't get across. Ahh! I went on my email and saw 7 reviews! I'm so happy, you guys are so awesome. Since this is my first fic, well aside from 'A Time and Place', these are my very first reviews! I hope you guys don't abandon this fic; I know it's been pretty boring so far, but we're getting somewhere! I don't know where yet, but be assured we are. I'm a little 'iffy' bout the sex scene that's coming up – I don't think its going to be on here so I guess for this version it'll remain un noted. When we get to that I'll either issue a warning that its on my website, or if its on this site and you should just skip it. I don't want to break any rules…that'd suck. Hope you enjoy! Reviews are much appreciated. x.

-Late

**Comments: All 7Reviews!**

**ZaKai: You are my very first reviewer…ever! If only we all could get cash that easily -Thnx!**

**Solo's Ghost: Actually it surprised me that I used Wufei, I was originally planning on one of my original characters, but found myself intrigued with this idea, really one of 'em had to be the bastard, lol.**

**ZmajGoddess: Well from the looks of it this ain't going to a be a lil' fic, hope you keep reading!**

**Devil1: And may it get even more interesting. x.**

**ZaKai (again): I think I messed up my style in both part 3 and 4, you be the judge – I think its because I'm not used to a lot of dialogue from different characters, All of my other fics that I've been doing all have a more dominant 1st person dialect.**

**Hkokuryuha: I'm trying, and from the looks of it I'll be continuing for a long time…**

**Clingy: I'm a very selfish person, I was so thrilled that I got 6 reviews that I almost skipped yours. Luckily I checked my email right when I finished Part 3. Well I was contemplating that question Q or no Q? That's yet to be decided— o wait it already is. Laughs evilly Well you're just going to have to find out now won't you. Speaking of homework I just completely ignored the loads of math I had planned for today – I'm screwed.**


	4. Unfortunate

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2

**CD Player:**

Artist: Tegan and Sara

CD: So Jealous

Most inspiring song(s): "Walking With A Ghost"

"I know I know I know"

Duo smiled at Trowa as he left the bedroom. Going down the hall towards the living room, Duo found that the couch had been turned into an almost miniature bed. It had, what looked to be two down comforters on top of the leather cushions. On top of the comforters there was a pillow, which happened to be sandwiched with yet another blanket above it. Duo looked at it a bit stunned, it looked more comfortable than anything that he had ever laid on, and he hadn't even felt it yet.

"I wasn't sure how many blankets you'd want but if you get too cold you can use one or both of the comforters as well."

Heero emerged from the kitchen with what looked to be a bowl of soup and a glass of water, the ice clanking against the glass repeatedly with each movement.

"How'd it go?" He asked curiously as he made his way toward the hallway stopping near the couch to address Duo, who realized that both items Heero was carrying were for him.

"I didn't know what you'd eat so I opted to make soup, I'll leave this glass for you incase you get thirsty, feel free to rave the fridge if you want. If you need anything all you have to do is knock on the door, the bathroom is the second door on the right," he pointed towards the hallway. "The doors open so you won't have a problem finding it."

"Thanks, I really appreciate it. You didn't have to do all this; it was probably a lot of unwanted work for you. Trowa's really lucky to have you, and he'll be the first one to admit that. It went well, I think Trowa had a scare but he's over it. I think he'll be very cautious about what's going on around him, but other than that he's just a bit stressed. I think he just has a bunch of mixed emotions overwhelming him right now. But I'm worried about Wufei coming back. He knows where Tro is, and from what Trowa's told me, he doesn't seem like the guy to just leave. Especially since he didn't leave with what he came for."

Heero closed his eyes, as a frustrated sigh escaped his lips.

"We might have to relocate…" He looked as Duo's eyes averted to the floor, "But he's adjusted here really well considering what he's been through, all thanks to you."

Duo looked up at Heero shaking his head, "he's a strong person, but he's even stronger when he's with you."

Heero looked uncertain, "He isn't always the way he is with you, he's not open. He closes himself off, and it's really frustrating. I wish that he'd open up to me. It sometimes feels like I'm the only one putting effort into this relationship. I know it sounds selfish, but I can't help it. He's a wonderful person, you can see that, I can see that, shit…everyone can see that except for him."

Duo knew that this issue was between Trowa and Heero, but he couldn't help remember what Trowa had said earlier, _He just doesn't realize that I don't think that I can let him go. I don't want to lose him, if he left me; I don't think I'd survive._

" I honestly think…no, I know that when Trowa's ready he'll open up to you, just give him some time, he'll come around. He loves you. All you have to do is have faith in him. Just think about that whenever you get frustrated. You're the best thing that's ever happened to him. Ask him, he'll tell you —but not right now."

Heero gave a small smile at his last words, he decided that Duo was the best thing that had happened to both of them, and he knew that a relationship was based on trust and faith, but patience was just as important and Duo had made that clear.

"Good night Duo." Heero said as he went to the front door to make sure it was locked; he would have to install another lock. As he turned to go back into the kitchen he was once again interrupted.

"I warned Trowa about how I will have complaints in the morning if you snore, but it'll be even worse if I don't get to borrow a brush right now and in the morning, as well as a shower—you do have conditioner right? A guys got to keep a good appearance."

Heero rolled his eyes at the last part of his sentence, but nodded in agreement.  
"In the bathroom there are two drawers underneath the sink, it's the second drawer, the one on your left."

Duo gave a grateful grin and stood up from the couch he had been sitting in and headed toward the bathroom in search of a brush. Heero however, went to collect Trowa's dinner and another glass of ice water, before headed toward the bedroom. Passing a very pleased Duo who held the brush in his hand, like a prize. When he entered the bedroom the light was dim, and on the bed asleep lay Trowa. Heero's expression relaxed a bit as he went to tuck his lover in, food forgotten.

The next morning, Trowa awoke unceremoniously to what seemed to be an imitation of the apocalypse, or at least that's what he gathered from Duo's screaming. He shoved the covers off him, ignoring the fact that he was only wearing a pair of boxers, and quickly made his way toward the hall bathroom. There he found a very distressed Heero, and Duo who seemed to be going into hysterics. It was obvious what Duo was so openly upset about, but it didn't change the fact that he was over reacting.

Now Duo was normally okay with insects such as spiders, but the fact that the spider had somehow managed to drop onto Duo and was now scurrying in an attempt to save itself in the safety of Duo's prized hair, well that was just going too far. Heero was trying to calm Duo down, while Duo's lithe body was squirming as he jumped up and down attempting to throw the unwanted insect off the back of his neck.

Unfortunately, for the bug, fate was not so kind; and with one accurate smack, its life forever ended. So as its murderer went to clean its remains off his hand, Duo collapsed on floor, jittering in the aftermath.

"I can still feel it crawling" Duo said nervously as he felt a tremor bolt up his spine as an after effect.

"That's funny I can feel it too—oh wait! It's because I killed it" Trowa said sarcastically as he watched the foamy soup suds, mix with the guts of the deceased spider, before rinsing, and repeating until the bug was no more.

"All that over a spider, the whole apartment must have heard you." Heero stated as he walked out of the crowded bathroom.

"Sorry 'bout that, I just didn't expect it." Duo said sheepishly and a bit embarrassed.

"Hn." Was all the response he got from Trowa as he made his way back to his bedroom, curling up on his side. Burying his face in the pillow, his right hand pulled the white comforter over him, until all that could be seen was a lump in the bed.

"He's not a morning person" Heero passed Duo as he headed for the closet in their room.

"I never would have guessed" Duo remarked smartly.

Duo remembered the discussion he had, had with Trowa the night before and smirked. Meeting Trowa had changed everything, he felt as if he could just be himself and have fun, almost as if he had grown out of his shell. However, his thoughts were soon side tracked as Heero emerged from the bedroom dressed in a casual grey muscle tee and a pair of worn and faded jeans.

"We'll go to 'The Count's' around 9:00 tonight, is that okay?"

"You sure Tro will still want to go?"

"Ha, he's the one that'll drag us there."

"Its that good?"

"He loves to dance, and he's damn good at it." Heero smirked as he went into the kitchen, Duo trailing behind him. _Today's going to be one very interesting day_ Duo thought, as he took a seat at the kitchen table; and it wasn't even 10 am.

"Hey Duo, I was wandering if I could ask you something?" Heero said as he placed two cups on the table, and turned to dig inside the fridge, reemerging with a carton of eggs. Duo watched as Heero began preparing breakfast before answering.

"Shoot."

A/N: Forget what I said, this fic is now getting up into the twenties. I have a general idea of what I want for the next chapters mainly parts 5-10 are planned out already. I have to write them though…. I don't know when I'll do them; I'll probably get to part 5 this weekend. This was actually a very uneventful chapter, and I apologize for that. But I really did try to salvage it. It just didn't work out. A mess within a mess, I say. But we're getting to the fun chapters! Next chapter will start the beginning of the 6x2 relationship! Go easy on me. I really have never done a 6x2 fanfic, I've read some but I was never really into it—I'm still not. Remember if you review, I'm more likely to update more often! Bribery is such a useful tool.

Comments: For my 5 reviewers 

ZmajGoddess: Actually I don't feel any differently toward Fei, but that's because I have many fics with him in it, none of which are finished, but I'll get around to posting 'em up here.

Sivy: Uh…I hope it goes alright too? Call me dense, but is that like saying that it has many possibilities to go right, just like it has as many possibilities to go wrong? Hmm.. Hope you keep reading!

ZaKai: When I got that review it made me feel so good, Thnx! A deal eh? I might just take you up on that. Just to let you know ahead of time, I'm really going to sound off with Hee-kun's character, I'm just so used to him being different…Of course that's how he is in my other fics…different (can't spoil my future fics now can I!).x.

Hkokuryuha: I'm not saying anything, my lips are sealed (whispers: he's coming) I have a feeling all of you are expecting him to be different then what he will be. I always knew he'd make a good bastard, lol.

Silverlie; Don't feel bad it actually took me a while to memorize that 6 was indeed Zechs, it took me longer to figure out which was Trieze (sigh). I honestly do try and update quickly, but homework is just such a pain.


	5. Risks

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player: Artist: Keane 

CD: Hopes And Fears

Most inspiring song(s): "Bend And Break"

"This Is the Last Time"

"She Has No Time"

Artist: Koyote

CD: Koyote 6

Most inspiring song(s): "Line"

Artist: Tegan and Sara

CD: So Jealous

Most inspiring song(s): "You Wouldn't Like Me"

Artist: The Rasmus

CD: Dead Letters

Most inspiring song(s): "Still Standing"

"I wanted to ask you something pretty personal, if you don't mind"

Heero had finished cooking breakfast for the both of them, and had sat down across from Duo. Looking straight on, eyes analyzing, almost calculating as he watched Duo nod briefly. The air in the kitchen became serious, silent, as both focused on the other.

"I noticed that you're house isn't very suitable, it's in poor condition – do you actually live there?"

"Well if I lived in a box I would have introduced Trowa to it" Duo remarked rather coldly.

"Trowa's grown very attached to you – I wanted to make a proposal."

"Gee, don't you think you should be telling this to Trowa then?"

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"So? What do you propose?

"I want you to think about moving in with us."

"You're kidding me?"

"No, but I was thinking that, if you'd consider this, that I can easily support the three of us, with my job, I could find a larger apartment. This would also help, because Wufei would no longer know where Trowa is. I do realize that you are both enrolled in the same school, I won't jeopardize that, if I can help it, but there's an apartment that I've had my eyes set on for the past couple months. Since Trowa first moved in. I don't want to seem like I'm invading or trying to impose, but I can also help you find a better job, a higher paying one at that. This is a lot to consider, especially since you don't really know me, or Trowa for that matter. I know you two are very close, and I doubt that I'd be able to get Trowa to move, if that meant leaving you. However, I don't want you to think that I'm only doing this so Trowa will be happy, but I feel as if you've helped the both of us out, and I want to repay you."

Heero looked at Duo as his amethyst eyes widened in surprise, a shocked, but weary expression etched across his face. A few seconds passed before Duo finally spoke up.

"That's a lot to think about, though the idea of leaving that shit hole is tempting – I don't want to be a bother or a nuisance. I have to admit that Tro's the only person I got – I think of him like a brother, as well as a best friend. I honestly can't imagine not having Tro in my life, now that he's here. It's selfish of me to want to have him around all the time, but I really don't want to lose his friendship, or yours for that matter. I don't think you know this, but I consider you both my family. I'd love to move in with you guys – I actually don't know how to react. I've been alone for so long, I don't want to be tossed aside like a piece of trash, I'm very afraid that you guys will leave me. I lost so many people I cared deeply about, that I'm afraid to say yes. But I really want to say yes – I know that I want to say yes. Are you really sure about this?"

Heero nodded, taking in the newly acquired information. It surprised Heero to know that Duo was scared of being abandoned. He'd have to remember that bit of information.

"I'm more than sure, so right now, you can just think about it – but in the meantime I'd like you to stay with us. I really don't like the fact that you've been living in such poor conditions."

"Well, that's one thing about me, I'll always rise above the flames – call it the devil's luck" Duo winked, "but I prefer to think that Shinigami's watching over me."

"Shinigami? You actually believe in a god of death?" Heero asked out of curiosity.

"Sure I do, now there's a god we've actually seen proof of! Everyone dies, so its only logical if you're gonna' believe in something – it might as well be it. Of course, I could just be deranged and am trying to impose my atheist beliefs onto a false god." Duo shrugged, not caring which was true, he was content either way.

"Interesting point­–" Heero was cut off by the videophone on the kitchen counter, ringing.

Duo watched as Heero got up and switched the screen on as he answered. Almost immediately a blond popped up on screen. His aquamarine eyes glittered in the sunlight from what looked to be a fine office. His lightly tanned skin was clear and complemented his very pale blond hair. In short, he was beautiful, but not in a normal way. He was very cute and in that sense he was attractive, but the way his emotions were expressed through his smile and through his eyes, made him beautiful. Duo was slightly reminded of an angel, and kept expecting that at any moment a halo would appear atop of the young man's head.

"Heero, how good it is to finally reach you! I swear the last couple times I called you were never there. How are you?"

"Quatre? What do you want?"

"That's not very polite," the blond, or Quatre if Duo had the name correct, laughed lightly, smiling brightly as he continued. " I'm going to come visit tomorrow morning, see how you're doing – catch up on things. How's that new boy of yours? Is he doing better, I can't wait to meet him."

"I'm sorry Quat, but I really don't think tomorrows going to work – I really am sorry."

"What's so wrong with him meeting me? I swear you think that I'm going to try and scare him off. There's nothing wrong with him meeting your ex! I'm sure we'll get along just fine."

" Quatre, he's not ready to meet you, we have a friend who is already staying with us, and this just isn't going to work out! How about I call you when he is? It'd be much simpler if we planned this for another time."

" I'm your friend! I haven't seen you in over five months, and with my schedule who- in Allah's name- knows when I'll have more time to visit you? I'm coming over, and your excuses aren't going to deter me! I'll be here for exactly two weeks, I'll see you in the morning – around ten o'clock. Bye"

"NO! Quatre wait!" Heero cried out frustratingly, but the screen remained black.

Duo watched as Heero turned to him, knowing that this wasn't going to be good.

"You can't tell Tro he's coming, okay?" Heero asked gently

"Your ex is coming?" Duo asked

"Just say you won't tell him." Heero countered

"Trowa's not gonna be too happy."

"Damn it Duo! Just don't tell him, I'll handle this!" Heero growled.

"I'm his friend, and whether you like it or not, if I feel that its in Trowa's best interest to tell him, I will" Duo snapped a bit frustratingly.

"I know what's in Tro's best interest! If I can help it, Quat isn't even going to meet him. Don't think that I don't know how scared Trowa will be if he even misinterprets Quatre's visit, a little. If anything, if I don't tell him, then Trowa will see that I really don't intend on leaving him – I do realize that its still risky. Tro could feel as if Quatre's competition, I don't want him to feel that way. That's why I really need you to just distract him or reassure him that Quatre's just a friend. Can you do that?" Heero rubbed his thumbs against his temples as he gazed at the table below him.

Duo sighed, how could he possibly keep this from Trowa? How could Heero ask him to do this? Why did Heero's plan actually sound good? He became irritated with himself, and tried to tell himself that Heero just wanted to do what was right for Trowa.

"Fine I'll keep this secret, however, if he asks me – I have to tell him. I have an honor code to follow, I may run and hide but I never tell a lie. You remember that." Duo sighed, as he ran his fingers through the end of his braid, twisting the silky strands that were still slightly damp from his shower.

"Thanks, I'm sorry for acting like a jerk. I just didn't expect Quatre to pull this on me right now." Heero looked up and glanced at the clock near the entrance. It was 11:32 am. Trowa would be up soon.

"I guess we're both a little stressed. This is really sudden."

"Yeah, he's like that – he may seem like the kind of guy you can predict, but really he's always been unpredictable at times."

"Like me!" Duo suddenly burst, as he gave a comical smile. Eyes glancing toward the entrance then back at Heero, giving a brief awareness that Trowa was awake.

It took a couple of minutes but finally Trowa emerged from the hallway and headed to the kitchen, spotting Heero, he walked over to the two at the table and sat down on Heero's lap, grabbing a piece of toast off of Duo's plate. Giving a brief grin before he bit into the piece of bread, he leaned back into Heero's chest.

"Comfy?" Heero asked Trowa as he gave a brief kiss to Trowa's neck

"Very." Trowa stated as he turned his attention to Duo's attire.

"You should wear that more often" Trowa looked at Duo's black muscle tee, wearing a pair of black jeans that hadn't been broken in yet.

"You're staring" Duo said a bit uncomfortably.

"I know." Trowa continued to let his eyes wander over Duo's body. When did Duo become so damn hot? Well sure he had a beautiful face, and his eyes were stunning, but out of that hoodie…

"Damn, and you're still single?" Trowa asked a bit shocked that he had never noticed this before. "We're gonna have to fix that now, won't we." Trowa smirked as he whispered into Heero's ear. Receiving a raised eyebrow in return, Heero answered in an amused tone.

"Well aren't you just planning his life out" He laughed lightly.

"Someone has to." Trowa winked at Duo.

"I'm still here you know, what ever you're planning you should share!" Duo drawled out, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Well, speaking of plans, what are we going to do today?" Trowa asked eyes trailing from Duo to Heero.

"Its Saturday, we're going to the gym." Heero answered bluntly as he began picking up the dishes, and quickly making Trowa a bowl of cereal. It took a half hour before they were ready to leave, and Duo had a weird feeling that something was going to happen that day – but he didn't know what.

Duo noticed that the change in attitude from earlier in the morning, compared to the fun and awake Trowa he was watching now; were considerably different. Apparently, Heero was already used to Trowa's morning behavioral routine. Sure, Trowa had talked about his life in the circus, and he had found out that Trowa had actually been an acrobatic, tightrope-walking, clown. However, actually seeing Trowa train at the gym was a whole different experience all together.

"Damn, you are so strong!" Duo exclaimed as he watched Trowa bench press 245 pounds easily.

"You should see Heero" was Trowa's reply as he glanced up at Heero whose position was currently being Trowa's spotter.

"You can use the equipment too, you know." Heero offered, as Trowa set the weight back on the bar, before standing.

"I'd look so bad compared to the both of you exercise-o-holics! Duo grinned as they headed over to the treadmills, where Trowa insisted that Duo at least occupy himself with a little work out. Duo may have been thin and a tad short, but he was definitely built. Or at least that's what Trowa had said when they had driven over to the gym that afternoon.

Without the over-worn hoodie, Duo actually had a very defined build. His arms were more defined in his biceps, but were not bulky. His stomach was evidently hard and flat, while his legs though nicely sculptured showed off his very defined thighs. And though Trowa had insisted that he was not checking him out, had admitted, after seeing Duo in a pair of relatively tight jeans; that he had a great ass. Which was true, and there was no harm in admitting it, but Duo had tried to joke his way into diverging their attention toward a different topic.

Duo did well, and after a three hour stay, they decided to head back to the apartment after grabbing a bite to eat on the way. Famished, both Duo and Heero agreed on Chinese, which Trowa, quite frankly had no opinion at all. They drove to a small Chinese restaurant and each ordered a three piece take out. Surprisingly Duo and Heero had similar tastes, though their personalities differed greatly. They both decided on chow mien noodles, with Mongolian beef, with a side of orange chicken, while also getting two sides of pot stickers for all three to share. Trowa chose a slightly vegetarian dish, which consisted of a vegetable shrimp dish, pork rice, and vegetarian noodles.

It took forever to eat the food, contrary to popular belief; Duo could pack away a lot of food. The contrary part was that he was not normally a fast eater. Heero was discovering the limits to how much one should consume of Chinese food in one sitting; and Trowa, well he was already finished. So as his boyfriend and best friend ate, Trowa excused himself to go to the bathroom.

Inside the bathroom, Trowa washed his hands and headed to a stall, kneeling in front of the toilet, Trowa shoved two of his fingers inside his mouth, pressing on the gag reflex with a thrusting motion. Which expert ease, the food he had consumed almost immediately came up with four long heaves. Feeling a wave of energy and feeling a bit shaky from the euphoric high, he grabbed a couple of handfuls of toilet paper, before wiping his fingers then his mouth clean from any excess vomit and saliva. It didn't take long for Trowa to clean up, and when he had flushed away all the evidence; Trowa proceeded to clean himself off at the sink. He cupped some water into his hands and splashed in on his face, eyes still open. He then repeated the motion, fingers brushing some of the streams of water dripping down his chin off, as he reached for a paper towel, and continued to dry his face, paying extra care around his eyes. Checking himself over in the mirror, and satisfied that the tears and swelling around his eyes had effectively been dried off, and weren't noticeable left the bathroom.

He then headed toward the table, a bit surprised t find the both of them sitting, clutching their stomachs, and avoiding the food in front of them.

"Tro, I think I'm gonna be sick!" Duo whined childishly.

Heero nodded in agreement not long afterwards. Rolling his eyes at the scene before him, Trowa proceeded to pay for the food at the cash register. _It was their own fault_, Trowa thought to himself. _And they better not expect me to drive._

While Duo chatted up a storm in the car, Trowa, who surprised Heero, was actually very talkative as well. While they held a conversation about the many humorous moments that Trowa and Duo had, had during their lifetime, Heero remained very silent, not joining into the conversation. Trowa had noticed that Heero had secluded himself from human interaction and tried to lead Heero into the conversation with no avail. Duo caught on and began making remarks on how the ones that are silent become psycho-killers later in life, or have split personalities, or just have mental breakdowns at a certain stage in their lives.

"Did you know that most people who remain as silent as Heero in this car, usually become psycho killers later on in life? You better watch it or someday he'll tell you that his inner voice is telling him to kill random people on the streets! I wish I had a stalker, do you know how great it'd be to have one! I could toy with whoever was…wait, wrong topic. I bet he'll name his inner self, Charlie, like in that one movie. That movie sucked, I insist that you don't see it. Really it's for the best."

"And what have you named the voice inside your head, Duo? Trowa grinned as Duo stuck his tongue out at him.

"I'll have you know that Jason is not a voice, he's a person!" Duo played along.

Not getting even the slightest reaction, Duo switched tactics. He began to ask Trowa about how life was with Heero, but in a comical way. Did he snore? Was he "good"? Did he complete him?

Trowa would have blushed, had he not realized that Duo was joking – but he couldn't help the fact that ever since this morning Heero had been acting differently. His lover's actions only furthered his curiosity. Why was it that Heero was acting so distant? And for that matter why was Duo acting a bit off? Almost as if he was hiding something or guilty; of what, Trowa wasn't quite sure of yet. Something was up, and it didn't make Trowa feel anymore comfortable.

Duo had never felt so guilty in his entire life. Sure the morning had started off as an interesting start and he had, had a very in-depth conversation with Heero, but the person who had called…how Heero had sworn him to not tell Trowa…. it was tearing him to shreds. Heero's ex-boyfriend was coming to visit tomorrow morning, and there was no talking him out of it – even though Heero had tried, desperately. It didn't make the situation any better, knowing that Heero's ex-boyfriend was damn cute. He didn't know how Trowa would react to this situation, especially when said ex-boyfriend was going to show up at their apartment. In his mind, Duo knew that "disaster" was written all over this new scenario. What the hell was Heero going to do? Did he realize that there was a very good chance that Trowa was going to freak out? Honestly he didn't feel like finding out what Trowa was going to do.

The day passed quickly and Heero continued to contemplate what he was going to do tomorrow morning, quite frankly, he was scared shit-less. Heero had been going over the different scenarios of what would happen tomorrow morning in his head for the entire day, he actually felt relieved that they were only a couple minutes away from The Counts Club. It helped that Trowa was such a good distraction. His lover was dressed in pair of low rise tight fitting black jeans, with a very nice black colored up shirt that was open to reveal his beautiful chest, it was almost identical to Heero's blue shirt, except for the fact that it was black. Trowa's entire attire consisted of black, which emphasized his emerald eyes to an extent in which Heero couldn't decide on where his eyes should focus on. He was simply gorgeous.

"When we get there, we're going to introduce you to Zechs." Trowa stated anxiously. "He's the owner and a friend of Heero's, I'm sure you'll like him."

Honestly, Heero was just waiting for Trowa to say something along the lines of "hint hint, nudge nudge." He really was going out of his way to get Duo interested in Zechs. Which was understandable, since both Duo and Zechs were single, both were strikingly beautiful, and both had long hair. The similarities in character, however, were considerably different. Zechs was rather serious and mellow, while Duo was loud and outgoing. He didn't know why Trowa was attempting to throw these two at each other, but it would seem that Trowa had planned this out, whether his plan would work, was still undecided.

"Owner! That dude must be loaded! You sure I'm gonna like him? You do realize that I'm not really looking for someone at this moment. Besides what if he doesn't like me? Then all your efforts would be in vain." Duo said as he played with the tip of his braid, watching the cars they passed as they finally made it into the parking lot.

"Who could not? Wait, don't answer that, I don't want to know." Trowa smiled as they got out of Heero's black, Lincoln Navigator.

"If I don't recall, you weren't this adamant about me meeting this guy earlier." Duo rolled his eyes as they headed toward the entrance.

They were shown in almost immediately, and Duo couldn't help but watch as they passed the outrageously long line waiting to get in. The music struck them as they entered the club. The lights were dark as red lights on the walls glowed in a gothic style. While white lights glimmered off the mirror above the bar. The walls were painted black, where numbers were painted in red all across the room. The floor however was painted a crimson shade with the exact opposite theme as the walls. There was a stage centered farther back in the room and as they made there way threw the throng of the crowd, Duo could see that it opened up into a ballroom sized room. Above them Duo noticed were two floors above them. All the floors except the floor the were on curved in a circle so that the complete center of the building was free so that a chandelier that reflected the off colors reflecting around the room as the music pumped loudly and vibrated through their bodies. Above the chandelier however was a complete ceiling made of glass, so that if you looked up the chandelier sparkled like diamonds against the star covered sky. It was extravagantly elegant on the top floors, while the floor they were on was of a gothic rave theme.

He felt Trowa grab his hand as he led him along the side of the room where a staircase led to the second floor. It was completely see through, so that as you walked up you it gave an illusion as if you were walking on air. As they reached the top of the staircase Duo could now observe the second floor properly. There were tables like you would find in a fine restaurant and the floor was furnished of red carpet while the walls were of a creamy white, and crown molding ran along the top and sides of the walls. It gave a strange romantic quality to the room though it held a Victorian feel to it as well. Duo couldn't help but take in the beautifully sculpted statues at the back of this floor as well. The entire back wall held a beautiful set of statues depicting a very controversial angel, whom was not entirely naked, yet its wings stretched and faded into carved designs. At the bottom of the statue was a glistening pool of water; that streamed from the left side of the wall and trailed down the left wing of the angel and fell to the basin. Inside the pool, there was another statue of a girl lying completely engulfed in the water, arms resting across her chest, hands holding both her shoulders in a relaxed manner. The entire piece was created from white marble and the white lights that surrounded the corners and some parts of the ceiling fell against it, highlighting its features in its entirety. It was stunning. As there group headed toward the sculpture, Duo glanced over the railing that cut off the floor's center, so that people could enjoy the music as well as watch others dance.

It didn't take long until they passed the marble attraction, and went to the side of the wall that led to another staircase directly behind the sculptured angel. Apparently you could enter from both sides of the sculpture, but what surprised Duo was that it was suddenly very dark, while the second floor was lit up with white lights, the staircase they were on was made completely of black marble, the walls around them were painted a dark blue, with tiny blue lights illuminating the staircase railing that consisted of silver chrome. The third floor apparently was for the "elite." It in the middle of the ceiling was the crystal chandelier, and above that the night sky. The music in here was a bit lower; the underlining beat was emphasized, giving off an almost exotic feel. Its floors contrasted sharply with the staircase, it was made of the white marble, and only this slab had black streaks running through them in a natural design. The walls were made of glass as well, and hardly any lighting was used, since the town lights sparkled through the glass, dancing across the room.

The third floor was nothing like the other two, it held a bunch of white couches with black leathered booths stationed on one front wall that was not made of glass. Duo was amazed by the interior decorating for the entire building, and was overwhelmed by the size of the place. It was amazing to say the least.

"Zechs." Heero greeted as he made his way toward one of the booths along the wall.

"Heero? Well, well, haven't seen you in a while." Zechs greeted in a formal tone.

"Where's Trowa? Zechs trailed off as he spotted Trowa and Duo making their way towards their table.

"Whom may I ask is that" Zechs gave a semi-curious and almost amused look as he raised an eyebrow at Heero.

"A friend." Heero stated simply as Heero sat across from Zechs, allowing Trowa and Duo to sit down.

"Such an extravagant vocabulary you possess" Zechs smirked lightly, before gazing at Duo.

"Zechs, this is Duo – Duo this is Zechs Marquise, the owner." Trowa stated as he waited for one of them to introduce themselves properly.

Duo was still a bit overwhelmed by the building that no words came to mind, fortunately he didn't need to say anything because Zechs took the opportunity to extend his hand in welcome.

"You're names Duo? I'm sure I'll remember it." Zechs's ice blue eyes glinted in the lights radiating from the town.

Duo had never seen anyone so attractive in all his life, well except from Heero and Trowa, but he wasn't interested in them, in the pit of his stomach he felt as if he had a dozen butterflies fluttering around, and his heart quickened as he smiled and answered.

"Likewise."

A/N: I'm so sorry it took so damn long! I tried to make this extra long to make it up to you guys. My description of the club, probably confused the hell out of all you, so just make up what you can't imagine. "Gawk at the severe change of theme that strangely looked as if I was losing my mind when I was typing this!"

The last two weeks were really rough on me; an ex-teacher of mine was arrested for having a sexual relationship with a student. It really hit me hard; I was just in shock – from his and that student's stupidity! On a lighter note, I was so happy that I'd get the time to write out this chapter – since we're on break, however I got sick right when we started break – so I'm feeling really shitty right now. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE REVIEW! I'm seriously a review addict and like interacting with my readers . I love to hear what you think about the fic! Also I've added my third fic onto this site – I recommend you read it. There's only one chapter up so far – and I don't plan on updating soon, but that shouldn't stop you. Its actually one of my favorites – The plot and idea are just so original, that I doubt that anyone's done this idea before. So check that out sometime. I might get another chap up this week, or over the weekend – who knows? I might get two?

This fic is based on one of the songs I mentioned on my "CD Player". I came up with this idea a couple weeks after I got the CD "Dead Letters" by The Rasmus, which is an awesome band by the way– I recommend you buy the album, its worth it! I got the CD last, last year (aren't I a smart girl), I would listen to it at 5:45 am when I'd go to kickboxing, and I was hooked on it! Still am. Remember to look at some of the songs I put on my list, they're all really good, and its also nice to listen to them while you read!

**Comments: For My 5 reviewers!**

**ZaKai: The joys of artistic license – Hee-kun's time is coming up. I hope he becomes better developed; I have a chapter I set up just for him! Keep reading – and it might have looked like I abandoned this fic, but just remember that once I make a promise – I always try to fulfill it. I'm very happy you liked my little sense of humor, I was afraid it was going to sound too corny. **

**Shadow of a Halo: I'm fearing that this fic is going get into the high twenties, (cringe) or thirties! It wouldn't be so bad if I had the time but…. Hope you continue reading and hope to hear from you again.**

**Devil1: And I'm going to feel real bad, when that waiting gets even longer! Hopefully you'll stick around.**

**Silverlie: OO Spanish, huh? I take Japanese – now there is a killer, lol. I'm so glad that you enjoy this fic, when I got you're review I wanted to make it longer to sustain you – hopefully I did well.**

**Jenihenpen: Oh no! I stopped in the beginning of a conversation – again! (Laughs evilly) Well at least this time, I don't think it will drive you mad. Well I made it longer to compromise for speed, how's that? I'm glad you like it, and there will be plenty of more 1x3 to come!**


	6. Disaster

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Yoko Kano

CD: Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex

Most inspiring song(s):"Inner Universe"

Artist: AFI

CD: Sing The Sorrow

Most inspiring song(s): "The Leaving Song"

"This Celluloid Dream"

Artist: Koyote

CD: Koyote 6

Most inspiring song(s): "Unforgettable"

"Track #8" (Note: Read A/N)

Artist: Muse

CD: Sing For Absolution

Most inspiring song(s): "Butterflies & Hurricanes"

"The Small Print" and the **entire** album

BEFORE YOU READ! THIS CHAPTER HAS BEEN ISSUED A LEMON WARNING. It's actually pretty important part of the 1x3 relationship, however there is a warning before the scene. So go ahead and read until you get there. However, there is more of the story after the lemon. So look for that. 

Zechs had been getting pretty bored with life. Sure he had an extensive amount of money to his name. He was only 23 years old, yet he had already inherited his family's wealth along with the Estate on L1. Though this was often thought to have been earned by 'The Counts Club" which he had started over a year ago, with booming success. One would think that he had everything, but there was always something missing in Zech's life.

He had been born Milliardo Peacecraft, but a tragic accident had left him and his younger sister Relena parentless. Though he had been seven at the time, this event had left him with responsibilities that most children his age could not comprehend. He was named the heir to the Peacecraft fortune, however a substantial portion was given to his four-year old sister.

From an early age, Zechs had strived to become his own person, not to just rely on money given to him by his deceased parents. He had matured at an early age; fun and games were left for his sister. He had to think ahead. He had planned out Relena's life to a certain extent. Though he loved his sister, and had made sure she went to all the proper boarding schools (1) and was financially secure, they had grown apart. He was never there, and though he had given Relena a lavish life filled with endless possibilities – they had never truly bonded.

Relena had recently been enrolled in a Private High School, on the L1 cluster. She was becoming quite the young woman, or so he heard. Relena had been brought up in the wealth and riches of life, though one may call her spoiled, her attitude remained that of a little girl placed in a room with nothing. She was bored. She could have everything, tutors, and private lessons in any area she wished. She had tried art, ballet, ballroom dancing, fencing, tennis, swimming, and poetry. She had taken up gardening; which lasted a week, she had tried her hand at modern dancing, and Relena had even taken up voice lessons. She was well rounded in most subjects; she could dine with all the 'right' people, and leave lasting impressions on all she met. She was strikingly good looking, and had maids waiting on her hand and foot. However she was not a snob, no, she was smart.

She could manipulate like no other; her gift was persuasion. She was proper, clever, and intelligent – she was already making a name for herself. Zechs knew this well. So many young and eligible men had requested his permission to marry her, all of which he had turned down. It was better they be turned down by him then allow any suitor the vicious treatment that Relena would surely give them. She was not mean, but a conversation with her could leave any man or women with self-doubt. She was a viper. Her bite was poisonous, and her looks alluring.

Though they knew each other well enough, Relena loved her brother. However she did not love him in the stereotypical sense of "I love you dearly" but in a way one would love a painting. The place and feeling you get while you stare at a painting, hits you deep and emotionally, yet only in your mind. This love was not expressed, except in simple and proper confessions whispered during goodbyes. Zechs would have it no other way.

No matter what Zechs did there was always something missing, a void that he could never fill. Money meant very little to him, he valued friendship over material objects. He may have been popular, good looking, and rich; however this didn't mean he had lots of friends. Actually there was only one person who he really considered to be his true friend, which was Heero Yuy. How they met, Zechs was still a bit unsure of. Heero had insisted that they had met at the bar inside his club, but Zechs had felt very strongly about how they had met earlier at an upscale party of one of Zechs partnering business affiliates. Heero's business, Zero Systems Inc, had just become a leading sponsor to this particular business; therefore, Heero had been formally introduced to Zechs the night of the party.

Heero Yuy was already becoming quite well known among the circle of wealth and Business Corporate headshots. He was twenty years old, and the owner of one of the most successful computer engineering facilities in the world. Ever since Zero Systems Inc.'s first debut in AC197, it had become one of the leading competitors in new age technology. Heero was a phenomenon, a prodigy at the age of seventeen. He was labeled a computer genius, and his picture had been spread on the covers of magazines and newspapers alike. However he was also one of the most elusive spectacles. The paparazzi could never find him, and in that Zechs held his full and utmost respect.

Though they had met in AC 199, Heero and Zechs had not spoken to each other the entire night of the party. However they had both left the party at the same time. After that night, they had never seen each other again. It was by chance that Heero showed up the same day Zechs had decided to wander to the first floor instead of relaxing on the third floor. There to his surprise, sat Heero. He had been nursing a bottle of water, was still in a business suit and was actually using the bar as his own personal desk. Numerous notes and files were scattered around him. Numbers and different codes covered the entire white surface of the papers. The bartender had apparently let it slide until he noticed Zechs making his way toward the bar. He politely, yet a bit hurriedly told Heero that if he had no intentions of buying a drink that he should seek elsewhere to do his work.

Heero remained where he sat and ordered a glass 'on the rocks'. Zechs sat down next to him, and before he knew it they had developed a routine. Heero would order a glass 'on the rocks' and pour the water that he brought with him inside the empty glass. It took a couple of minutes for Zechs to start a conversation, but once he did, the conversations they held were deep and entertaining. It was exactly what Zechs had been missing.

Of course their location had moved to a more convenient spot on the third floor, but their routine had stayed pretty much the same, that is until Heero met Trowa.

Zechs held a great liking to Trowa, he was quite the character and he saw just how happy he made Heero. But Zechs also realized that he was jealous of him. Not in the sense of attraction, but sometimes Heero wouldn't show up, or Trowa would want Heero to dance. He could handle it though, he knew how much they meant to each other, but he wouldn't ignore the fact that he indeed was jealous. He saw something that he could never have between the two of them. Love. However this wasn't the love found in fairytales and storybooks, but companionship. He saw how Heero had been as a solitary person whom he had been able to relate with. Zechs truly longed to rid himself of the burden of being lonely, and for the first time in his life; he actually believed he'd found it. The answer. The answer that was held in a pair of deep violet blue eyes, eyes that he couldn't tear his gaze away from.

She continued to stare at herself in the mirror, lips coated in a shimmering gloss; luscious against her lightly tanned skin. Her vibrant blue eyes gleamed in the artificial light from the inside of her car. She had been sitting there for the last fifteen minutes. No thoughts formed inside her head, she just continued to stare. Her honey blond hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail, her recently cut bangs were styled so that they hung at mid-brow. However they weren't straight, but flattered her, currently her bangs were parted so that they rested against one half of her face.

She didn't comprehend why she was here, sitting outside 'The Counts Club' in her black Jaguar 2005 XKR Coupe. As she tapped her painted white nails against the steering wheel. She let out a sigh as she sank back into the light khaki leathered seat. Her hand strayed toward the Burl Walnut colored trim as she leaned forward, lightly resting her upper body against the steering wheel, as she laid her cheek on top of the steering wheel's glossy finish. When did she get here? Did it matter? Should it matter? She wasn't certain. Nothing was certain anymore. She let her gaze wander towards the building in front of her. She had never been to her brother's club, never felt the need to. But there she was only minutes away from her brother. _This is ridiculous_ she thought, _I didn't drive all the way here just to enjoy the scenery. _She moved to get out of the car and stopped. _Once I'm in, then what? How do you possibly explain to your twenty-three year old brother, you've just contemplated suicide for the entire day? He'll think I've gone insane. He'll blame this on himself, my lack of proper sense. _She opened the door, letting out a frustrated sigh as she began to cross the street. _This is it, Relena. You should have just taken the pills. I'll just make up an excuse, yes, I'll convince him that I should stay. It'll have to do._

In all actuality, Relena was not who she appeared to be at school, she was not a slut, nor was she stupid, ignorant, or a bitch. This was not in her nature, it was all a façade – know one knew the true Relena Peacecraft, and she intended on keeping it that way. She felt it right to act like the stereotypical rich snob. She carried herself at school as a person who held herself higher and more elite than the rest of the world. Hence, she held her own fan club – or rather a following. In her own mind, she had nicknamed this ridiculous and immature circle as her "cult." Of course she was much more mature than she lead on, she felt nothing when she played tricks on the less popular or nameless "freaks" at school. She held no dislike or liking for Duo Maxwell, and yet she tormented him. No, she didn't torture him — she acted the part. She became the actress and her followers the easily entertained audience. She held power within the school; there were no competitors, no challenges. That is, until she met Trowa Barton. She had been quite impressed with him; she had even been surprised that he had managed to break through her barrier of indifference. This intrigued her, yes, but in the grand scale of things – he was insignificant. They all were insignificant, she had no use of them, nor would they have use for her in the future. It was a simple mundane fact. There was nothing significant in her life. She was trapped in a life that wasn't hers, she had never chose this life; no, this had been chosen for her.

"You must be the new addition." Zechs smiled, eyes calculating, etching, and memorizing Duo's features.

"Uh….yeah." Duo said a bit uncertain, _what did he mean by that?_

"I mentioned you in a previous conversation." Heero stated as his hands slipped around Trowa's waist.

"He speaks." Trowa commented amusedly. He smiled at Duo before suggesting they go dance, purposefully leaving Heero and Zechs behind.

Out of earshot, Trowa popped the burning question.

"So?" He asked anxiously as they made their way downstairs.

"What did you think about him?"

"You planned this." Duo looked at him a bit wearily, if there was one thing Duo didn't like, was a set up, relationships could be dangerous.

"No, I didn't plan anything. I just wanted to know your opinion." Trowa said casually, stopping abruptly as a figure crossed his eye. _But that can't be. _He thought albeit a bit concerned. _Why is she here?_

Turning to Duo, Trowa started to backtrack their way to the third floor. Duo followed behind a bit confused about Trowa's odd behavior. Duo had about to shrug it off, when his eyes caught sight of an all too familiar figure at one of the stools at the bar. He felt his entire body go rigid, as shock that felt like ice, shot up his spine. _No!_ Duo cried mentally. He swiftly turned and dashed toward Trowa's retreating back, so startled he passed a confused Trowa before the fear took hold of him. He ran. He was nearly shoving everyone that got in his way out of it, he wasn't thinking clearly, he had to hide, had to get away from him. So caught up in his own world, he didn't hear Trowa calling after him, they had made it to the statue entrance when he felt his arm get tugged back, he let out a yelp, as he came face to face with none other than Relena.

"Why are you here?" Relena spoke calmly; for once she honestly didn't care if she was acting out of character.

"I…I'm with a friend of mine." Duo tried to give a smart-ass smirk, but ended up frowning. He was feeling anything but intimidating at the moment.

"Really?" Relena asked curiously, "with who? You do realize that the third floor is off limits to most." She gave a soft tone, not in the least bit offensive.

"He's with me." A strong voice came from behind them, as Trowa finally managed to catch up with Duo.

Relena felt herself smile, "Really? Then all three of us are heading upstairs I assume." Her hand brushed back a few strands of her longer bangs back behind her ear. This was quite interesting, never would she have guessed that these two would be in a circle of her elite peers. No matter. They all had their own lives to attend to.

"Well this chance meeting was quite unexpected," she drawled. "However I assure you it was still pleasant, I hope you gentleman, enjoy the rest of your evening." She had reverted back toward the staircase; she was in a black dress that was layered on the bottom half with a thin see through material that frilled lightly in soft waves at the very bottom. It only reached to the tip of her knees, but it was sleek, and slim against her slender frame. It was a sleeveless dress allowing her face, and hair to be showcased. She adorned this outfit with black open strapped heels. She hadn't the need to put on jewelry, the lip-gloss and a light amount of make-up was all she had felt to be necessary for this outing.

Duo looked at Relena and registered her words, he nodded wearily, before facing Trowa's questioning gaze.

"The pleasure was ours." Trowa responded without addressing the girl head on.

Giving an apologetic look to Trowa, he motioned to follow the already retreating girl.

A/N: sucks! I had a beautiful 7,000 plus chapter, and it screwed everything up! Grr..Anway the next chapter is the continuation. All comments and explanations will be on the next chapter.


	7. Misunderstanding

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Yoko Kano

CD: Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex

Most inspiring song(s):"Inner Universe"

Artist: AFI

CD: Sing The Sorrow

Most inspiring song(s): "The Leaving Song"

"This Celluloid Dream"

Artist: Koyote

CD: Koyote 6

Most inspiring song(s): "Unforgettable"

"Track #8" (Note: Read A/N)

Artist: Muse

CD: Sing For Absolution

Most inspiring song(s): "Butterflies & Hurricanes"

"The Small Print" and the **entire** album

**BEFORE YOU READ! THIS CHAPTER HAS BEEN ISSUED A LEMON WARNING. It's actually pretty important part of the 1x3 relationship, however there is a warning before the scene. So go ahead and read until you get there. However, there is more of the story after the lemon. So look for that.**

Part Two

Title: _Running_

After being left alone, the two friends began their "ritual" as Trowa had once dubbed their routine chatter. Honestly they enjoyed having the time to just talk, they were very similar, sharing common interests, and overall enjoyment of spending time with each other. However the discussion from the moment his lover and Duo had left had immediately switched to Duo. Zechs was very interested in him, surprisingly Trowa's "plan" was not only a success, but was on the borderline of obsession. Of course the discussion ended only a little while after the two had left, as a figure made her appearance at the entrance of the room.

Zechs froze; she was there, in his club. But what the hell was she doing there? Sure they were in the same colony, and happened to be relatively closely situated – but there was no contact. Rarely did they have the chance to meet. This startled him; there was no reason for her to be here. Not that, he didn't want his younger sister to be there; Relena was not one to go to such social gatherings such as clubs. She actually was a very solitary person.

"So you are here." Relena approached the table; her heals clicking softly, the thrumming of the music softly filtered through the room. She noticed Heero a moment later.

"And so are you." Zechs smiled, it was formal and a bit staged, however his eyes held a carefully held amount of curiosity.

"What brings you here? Obviously not for a casual talk I presume, that's not your style. Or shall I say, not in your blood. We both know that small talk is inadequate between the both of us." Zechs greeted, hand gesturing for her to take a seat next to Heero.

"Great minds think alike, I suppose" She smiled at Heero as she took a seat. "Pardon my intrusion. I don't believe we've been formally introduced, my name is Relena Peacecraft."

"Heero Yuy, it's a pleasure" Heero responded, nodding his head lightly. So this was Zech's little sister. Heero's eyes caught sight of Trowa and Duo entering the room, however he also noticed Relena's eyes travel to the pair as well.

"That's strange" Relena whispered, before addressing her older brother. "Yes, this is a conversation that is to be discussed between the two of us, with great importance. I've come to you with a proposal, so to speak." Her tone was that of two business associates discussing an important deal.

"What could this proposal be?" Zechs drawled, for some reason he had a nagging feeling that this "business deal" would end up costing him something. That something, he figured, would not be good.

"I propose a visit, or to put it plainer terms, I would like to stay with you for a while." She crossed her hands, sitting straighter, eyes watching Zechs's reaction.

"Stay, as in live?" Zechs was caught off guard.

"Yes, live." She answered calmly.

"A while." He repeated.

"Or a couple months." She stated.

"Months?" He asked, this was getting to be awkward.

"Or longer." She finished, looking at him with a look of pure expectance. She expected an answer, and from the looks of it, a two-letter response would not cut it.

"What prompted this…sudden decision?" He asked skeptically, however he felt a bit desperate. He couldn't have his little sister living in his house! He was a grown man! A grown and moody and sometimes horny man! How could he let Relena see him, see his lifestyle…see some things that most straight men wouldn't necessarily have.

"Time." Relena said albeit a bit distantly, "Time for the both of us to catch up, its obvious we haven't spent that much time together, for the last couple years. What better than to spend some time together?"

"Well, Heero, you'd never guess who my new roommate is." Zechs drawled sarcastically, putting emphasis on the last part of the sentence. As he gave a side glance to his friend.

"So it's a deal." Relena smiled.

"A deal? Now Lena, what am I getting out of this? Other than the pleasure of having your company for the next couple of months or so?" He quirked an eyebrow up, "That my dear little sister, is not a deal."

Relena gave a wink "Touché."

From afar, Trowa saw the arrogant girl make her way toward Zechs's table. It didn't quite register until he remembered Duo's words from the pizzeria, "_That's Relena Peacecraft! She's the richest bitch at the school._" Then it hit him. Peacecraft, the name sounded so familiar, that name had been mentioned before. Zechs Marquise wasn't his true name – It was Milliardo Peacecraft. Trowa couldn't believe it, he had ripped Zech's sister off, not only that – he felt like cringing.

However Trowa couldn't get over how strange Duo was acting. He had just fled the scene. He was also acting as if he were nervous about something.

"What's up with you? He asked, concern clearly in his voice. "You're acting weird."

"Its nothing. I…I suddenly want to go home. That's all." Duo said quietly, eyes adverting Trowa's.

"Serious? You feeling sick?" Trowa gave a worried look; this definitely wasn't Duo's normal characteristics.

"I saw someone." Duo said wearily.

"Did that someone 'cause you trouble?"

"No. Yes. I…you know I trust you, right?" Duo looked at him in earnest.

"Yeah, Duo what's wrong?"

"I can't tell you here. I can't tell you right now, I'm sorry." Duo looked away, ashamed at his behavior. Here Trowa had shared such personal experiences with him, and he couldn't do the same. He felt like an idiot.

"No prob. When you're ready, you can tell me. You want me to go retrieve Hee-kun? The slip of his lover's pet name rolled off his tongue before he could stop it. His cheeks flushed as Duo gave him a sly wink. Even though Duo was hardly in the joking mood, when he was with Trowa, he felt better about himself.

"I don't want to spoil your time, I know you really wanted to dance and all." Duo drawled a small smile lingering on his lips.

"Nah, we can come here anytime."

"Maybe I'm just being paranoid." Duo sighed.

"It won't be any trouble to go back home, I'm going to get Heero – Hey we'll both go get him, how's that sound? Trowa smiled at him.

"Thanks." Duo said softly, a gratified smile gracing his features as they made their way to the booth.

Zechs noticed the two friends making their way toward the table; a part of him was excited to get the chance to see Duo again. However a wave of disappointment hit him like a brick as he realized that Relena was there. There was no possible way of flirting with that sexy brunette in the presence of his younger sister. Being a closet case had its downfalls. Now was a particularly good example.

"Heero lets call it a night – the DJ's not playing anything worth dancing too." Trowa winked at Zechs. "We'll just leave you two alone to talk." He grinned.

"Leaving so soon?" Zechs questioned, taking a glance at Heero's confused expression. "Then I guess I'll see you at our next meeting." Zechs smiled at Heero.

"Knowing him, it'll probably be sooner." Heero stood to leave, gesturing to Trowa with a flick of his thumb.

Relena who had been quietly watching this exchange of words, sat up to make way for Heero.

"I wish you both the best of luck." Heero smirked, before turning and following his lover and Duo's retreating form.

When they arrived back at their apartment, Duo made the decision to stay. He waited for Trowa to go take a shower before starting up a conversation with Heero.

"You know what we talked about earlier? About me staying with you guys?" Duo asked, not tearing his eyes away from the TV.

"Yeah."

"I think I'd like too." Duo said casually, though his heart was beating furiously within his chest. "To stay that is."

"That's great." Heero said encouragingly. "I'm sure that you'll both like it at the new apartment. It'll be better suited as well."

"This all feels surreal" Duo whispered under his breath, as he closed his eyes and tilted his head back against the leather couch, that in one day had become his bed. His life was just full of surprises lately. However two matters would not leave his train of thought. The first being the almost run in with his past, he just couldn't think about that right now. The second being that ice blue gaze that sent sparks through his entire body, every time he thought of them. Zechs was gorgeous, hot, and down right sexy. His voice was deep, luscious in a sense, as well as seductive. So many dirty thought were running through his mind that it disturbed him. Was it normal to want to go down on a man he hardly knew? Was it wrong to imagine what it would feel like to be penetrated by him? Of course his mind was at war with itself. Part of him was saying, _Bad Duo, Bad. Stop thinking that! _While the rest of him was picturing all types of different hot and heavy scenarios, all of which featured him and the blond god.

**WARNING: EXPLICIT YAOI: LEMON SCENE, RECOMMENDED MATURE READERS. To skip, look for the "End of Lemon Scene" further down.**

**CD Player: **

Artist: Sayaka

Single: Mizuiro

Most inspiring song(s): Mizuiro

After saying goodnight to Duo, both Trowa and Heero retreated to their own room. It felt nice to lie on the bed and watch his lover undress, at least from Trowa's current position on the bed, lying on his stomach, as the dim light illuminated Heero's naked form.

He was damn gorgeous. It still felt a bit weird, to know that Heero loved him, that this wasn't just a sick joke being played on his psyche. Getting a bit too caught up with his thoughts, he didn't register his lover's weight on the bed, until he felt Heero's lips on the back of his neck and trailing down his shoulder. He loved the special attention, and before too long his arms were wrapped against Heero's neck. Allowing his lover's hands to explore his entire body, as the kisses became more heated and passionate, his lover's hands became more impatient and aggressive. One hand trailed its way underneath his pants, past his boxers, before grasping his half erect penis. He felt a shock go up his spine, a tingling sensation spread throughout his body, as he moaned softly. Breaking their lips apart for air, Heero trailed down to Trowa's collarbone sucking and kissing a bit of newly bruised flesh.

Heero's hand began to stroke harder, Trowa was now dripping pre-cum against his lover's thumb. It was a slow torture, one that promised more to come. He groaned as his hips bucked instinctively. It felt so good. His own lips found themselves swollen and begging to be trapped against Heero's once more. It was overwhelming the pleasure coming from his erection, the shock waves coursing through his body – his blood coursing like fire in his veins. However it wasn't ecstasy. No, having his lover fully impaled in him would be.

Nevertheless, Trowa still felt that this could all be taken away from him. He loved Heero, more than anything. But it just wasn't enough. He trusted Heero, but he didn't trust himself, if Heero met someone else – Trowa wouldn't be able to trust himself to keep the relationship going. He would undoubtedly mess things up. He would lose him. And for Trowa that was more frightening than he could ever possibly imagine. It was unthinkable.

"I love you." Heero moaned huskily into Trowa's ear as he kissed his neck, nipping his chin as he pulled the last off Trowa's pants off of his lithe form.

"I..." Trowa trailed off, it always happened like this. He just couldn't say the words – he could tell them to himself to Duo, but not to him. It frustrated him to no end.

"You don't have to say it." Heero whispered patiently.

Trowa would have apologized had it not been the exact moment Heero's now slick finger, pushed its way into his tight passage. A second finger found its way only a moment later, thrusting as his lover adjusted to the sensation of being fingered. He let out a gasp, before relaxing his body, in the beginning it was hard to adjust so willingly, but now only a couple months into their relationship Trowa was already used to their lovemaking. Yes, it was unusual, and considered illegal to have sex with a minor. Trowa didn't care, Heero didn't care, and as far as he was concerned no one did. As his body became slick with sweat, his breath hitching as his lovers fingers thrust deeper and faster, hitting his prostate with experienced ease. He let out a few shaky moans, as sighs released some of the strain from the intense feeling of ecstasy. Heero moaned as he applied a healthy amount of lubricant on his cock, before positioning himself at Trowa's opening. Heero gripped his hip as his other hand caressed Trowa's cheek, their eyes never leaving the other.

Heero lowered himself, gently but steadily impaling himself inside his lover, careful as to not hurt his lover in any way. Trowa let his head fall back, mouth open as he felt his lover fill him. He was on fire, and desperately wanted Heero to move. He gave a low groan as Heero bucked gently, testing to see if his lover was fully adjusted.

"Heero…harder." Trowa breathed, Heero nodded once before picking up the pace. Soon he was thrusting deeper and harder, allowing a rapid yet steady pace. His cock, trapped between both of their bodies, ached with need. He felt his stomach tighten as quick spasms filtered through his body. He was careful not to cry out, they were being very quiet, attempting to allow Duo the blissful unawareness of what they were up to. Trowa covered his mouth with the back of his fist, Heero continued to thrust faster, the sounds of low moans and gasps as well as the slapping of flesh against flesh, were the only sounds that filtered through the room. Trowa's legs slid off his lover's back, as they spread, attempting to grip onto the mattress.

He felt blinded by the heat coursing through his body as well as the shock waves sent from his prostate being pounded mercilessly. His breaths became quick gasps as all coherent thoughts left him. It was just the two of them. No, they were one, connected by a physical and emotional bond. Heero's hand reached in between their bodies, stroking Trowa's throbbing member continuing until Trowa's body went rigid. He barely had time to capture Trowa's mouth, drowning his lover's pleasured cry, as Trowa's chasm tightened, engulfing him in tight warmth. As Trowa's hot, sticky seed spilled onto his stomach, Heero managed a few rough and instinctive thrusts as he too filled his lover with his essence. Claiming, marking him as his own.

Completely sated, Trowa felt his eyelids grow heavy; the last few tremors of his release left him with exhausted, and completed. Heero rested on top of him, gently smoothing out his hair, as their breathing began to even out.

"Hold me." Trowa said softly, his entire body felt weak and tired, but his mind went from post coital bliss, to one of desperation and panic. He felt suicidal – and it scared him. There was no reason for him to feel that way. There were no thoughts or conclusions as of why he would want to do such a thing. But he did.

"You're trembling" Heero whispered, concern evident in his voice.

"I'm just tired." Trowa breathed back, his eyes already feeling weighted down. However the fear that gripped him lingered even after his eyes had fallen shut.

**END OF LEMON SCENE**

Duo felt as if he could just lie on that couch all day, he would have fallen back asleep had there not been a knocking at the door. Drowsily, he looked at the clock next to the TV. 7:45 am. Who would visit at this hour of the morning…Shit! Heero's ex-boyfriend was there, outside the door. He got up a bit unsteadily, still not fully awake. Before he reached the hall, Heero emerged with a scowl on his face to match the grouchy muttering of what he only assumed to be Japanese.

"Meiwaku na baka. Sono yori ni hayai."(2) Heero growled as he headed toward the door. Slowly his head turned toward Duo and then the clock.

"Sono nana-ji go-ju pun desu!"(3) Heero exclaimed agitatedly. Looking at the door incredulously, before opening the door.

"Good Morning Heero!" Quatre stood smiling in the doorway. His aquamarine eyes seemed to illuminate his face, however Duo figured that it had something to do with his tired mind confusing images in his head.

"Quatre, when you said morning, we expected you at 11:00." Heero stated. Moving aside to allow the unwelcome guest into the apartment.

"I assumed that too, however the shuttle was ahead of schedule." Quatre beamed, fully aware that Heero did not want him there, nor was he going to play the friendly host. Though he did notice the brunette behind Heero.

"Hi! You must be…" His smile faltered, as he quickly turned to Heero. "You said guest, what's his name?"

"Duo" Heero deadpanned.

"Duo." Duo answered at the same time.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Quatre smiled. "My name's Quatre Raberba Winner."

Heero watched as Duo's eyes widened slightly. Before staring at Heero and then back at the blond Arab.

"Winner…as in WEI? The multibillionaire?" Duo asked in a hushed tone, as if out of no where their would appear a band of paparazzi stalkers, their evil camera's flaring, and in Trowa's words "adding five plus pounds per picture."

Quatre looked at him oddly, before nodding.

"It's really not that big a deal, besides Heero's just as wealthy."

Heero's eyes adverted Duo's as he gawked at the scene playing out before him. Heero was a multibillionaire? Was that possible – then it hit him. _"Hee's friends with the owner."_ Of course, the wealthy were known to group together.

"WEI, however, isn't as popular as it used to be. I mean, it's still one of the top leading business corporations in the world, but Zero Systems Inc. has been progressively growing to be one of the top competitors throughout the Earth and Colonies." Quatre cut off, still looking at Duo's confused expression.

"Zero Systems?" Duo asked, turning to face Heero, with violet eyes full of innocent confusion.

Quatre gasped, a surprised expression placed across his angelic features.

"Zero Systems Inc. is one of the largest technologically based business incorporation, that the world has ever seen! Heero is the CEO and founder of this international phenomenon." Quatre glanced at Heero for confirmation. Receiving a nod in return he continued.

"Duo, do you honestly not recognize Heero's name?" He asked kindly, though a hint of disbelief was evident.

Duo blushed, honestly Trowa had never mentioned Heero's last name. Instead of being put through further embarrassment, Heero gave a slight smile.

"My name is Heero Yuy." His smile widened, "Obviously, Trowa neglected to tell you this tid bit of information, my apologies, I thought you knew."

Feeling dazed, Duo nodded dumbly, before turning and walking down the hall. He needed to see Trowa. He had to get away from the awkwardness of finding out that his best friend's lover was a multibillionaire.

Walking inside the room, he shut the door behind him. He heard the shower running, and called out to Trowa, letting his presence be known to the other occupant in the room.

"Duo?" Trowa answered as the running water ceased. "I'll be out in a sec." He called, the sounds of dripping water, and a glass door sliding shut, accompanied the last part of his sentence.

"We have a guest." Duo called, "However you don't get to meet him until you answer my question." Duo said in a mockingly teasing voice.

"Why didn't you tell me your boyfriends rich? Not only that but he's famous!" Duo exclaimed. "You've been holding out on me!" He whined, though humor was evident in his voice.

"He told you?" Trowa asked as he finally emerged from the bathroom. Steam escaped through the open door, a nice scent of shampoo and soup mingled with the moist air.

"The guest did." He stated simply.

"All this about a guest, who is it?" Trowa asked as he walked past Duo and pulled on a grey muscle tank shirt. He was wearing worn tweed pants, navy blue, graying from being over-worn. They were loose fit, and clung to his frail waist, the bottoms of the pants were tearing from being stepped on too many times with the heels of his feet and shoes. He slipped on a pair of black and white flip-flops. Pulling on a grey zip up hoodie that read "Viva Brigade" in white letters, accented with a white skull, with two rifles replacing the crossbones.

"Honestly I didn't know if Heero wanted his name to be known or not." Trowa winked at him. "I knew you'd find out eventually, I didn't think that it would matter." He explained simply.

"Would have been nice if you had given me a clue," Duo smiled, "But I'll let you get off with a warning."

After watching Duo disappear into the master bedroom, Heero and Quatre were left alone to talk.

"Trowa's still unstable, it's imperative that you keep a healthy distance away from me. I really don't mind you being here, Quat. Nonetheless, you have to understand that he's going to feel very uncomfortable around you. He's very unsure of himself, I don't want him to jump to conclusions or get the wrong idea." Heero stated, there was no room for argument. Heero had made it very clear, that during Quatre's stay; they were to stay neutral. Their friendship was to be completely platonic, which he Heero knew would be difficult for Quatre.

Quatre was very flamboyant, outgoing, and clingy. He thrived on physical contact. Not sexually mind you, but through gestures, dragging people by the hand, and hugging. This made Heero nervous, one misunderstood hug could unintentionally lead to disaster.

"I'm not here to jeopardize your relationship with Trowa, I'm here because I want to keep our friendship – I want it to be like it was before." Quatre was about to say more, when the door to the master bedroom opened, revealing Duo and Trowa.

"Heero, it's in-polite to not introduce us." Quatre smiled.

"Quatre this is my boyfriend Trowa. Tro, this is Quatre." Heero said casually, though inside he was nervous, this was the moment of truth.

Duo noticed the awkward silence, as Trowa stood looking at Quatre, not saying a word. Quatre's smile faltered. Heero was starting to look unsure about introducing the two.

"It's nice to meet you, I've heard so much about you." Quatre tried to ease the situation. Trowa remained silent, before his eyes narrowed at the sight of the suitcases.

It happened so fast that Duo, now running after Trowa, hardly registered what had taken place in the apartment only minutes before. Trowa had gotten the wrong idea. Oh had he gotten it wrong. Duo understood how Trowa could have jumped to the conclusion that Heero was getting back with Quatre. Actually, he didn't, but he did see a small connection.

"Boyfriend." Trowa repeated, looking at Heero. The tone was emotionless; it unnerved Duo to hear Trowa like that. He didn't miss the connection that passed between the two lovers though.

"Trowa, it's not like that." Heero was quick to state. "He's visiting."

"Visiting." Trowa repeated. He didn't believe it.

"It was just a joke." Trowa whispered, the pain in his voice causing it to waver.

"You were planning on this." Trowa was now rambling a bit incoherently.

"I have to leave." Trowa continued, no longer registering the others in the room.

"Trowa, Heero is right." Duo said, trying to get Trowa to calm down. His attempt failed. Trowa's lip was trembling as well as his entire body.

Apparently Heero's train of thought came too late, the moment he tried to grab Trowa, Trowa ran out the door.

Duo looked around him, _Shit!_ He cursed mentally. He had lost him. Trowa had run away and Duo was at a complete loss as to what to do. He was vaguely aware of Heero's abrupt presence.

"I lost him." Duo said. He felt so lost.

"You didn't lose him," Heero said, pain evident in his voice. "I lost him."

Duo understood the double meaning without a second thought. Remembering the night Trowa had told him about his past. He felt a shiver run up his spine as a Trowa's voice echoed in his mind.

"_I don't want to lose him, if he left me; I don't think I'd survive."_

A/N: Two words. Writer's-block. I have spent the last…. what is it now, 3 weeks? Attempting to salvage/ write this chapter! Finally I have accomplished it. I really do regret writing chapter 5, because it has shifted the entire story. I would complain more – however I don't feel like it right now. Okay, I would have issued the warning ahead of time had I known that the sex scene was going to be in this chapter. O well, I would say "once a blond always a blond", however that doesn't work since I'm not a blond. (o) I have to say that I honestly don't know where this is going – Wait! Scratch that, I do. Somewhat. Don't listen to me, I'm rambling. All the sex scenes in this fic are actually very important! I'd rather you guys not miss them, but I understand completely if you skip 'em. REMEMBER TO REVIEW! Reviews are what encourage me to write. SO FRUSTRATED THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ONE CHAPTER! Pissed at for screwing this up!

1.) Burmens High School – Which is actually St. Burmens High School, the St. is left out to make it sound more casual. It is actually a very pricey boarding school reaching over 15,000 dollars to attend. It's located on L1 and is actually a boy-girl boarding school, that offers on campus dorms, or the option to live off campus. Relena lives off campus. Surprisingly Duo was enrolled by social services; this of course, was brought extra attention from the media. The Maxwell Church Massacre brought a bunch of sympathizers, with such a misfortunate accident, Duo was placed in a good schools. However, academically in his younger years, before entering High School he had one a scholarship. This is what led, to Duo entering St. Burmens Boarding School; informally known as Burmens High School.

2.) "Annoying idiot. It's too early." – I'm getting better a decoding Kanji (Go me!)

3.) Could also be written "Sono 7:50 AM!" both mean "It's 7:50 AM!" – Seriously, what could be more annoying than a visitor in the morning?

**Cd Player**: I unfortunately don't speak or understand Korean. However, I can sing it. And I sing along to Koyote very often, they're probably my favorite Korean group. Besides Moon Hee Jun, that is. I actually am into listening to Japanese and Korean band/groups. So when I say Track #8, it's because the title was written in Korean…and I don't know how to type Korean – since I wouldn't know what I'd be writing.

**Comments: Props to my 7 reviewers!**

**Zakai****：ちおとう。。。わたしはかきませんでした。ごめんね。あなたはげんきですか。わたしのげんきです。わたしはあなあのストリはグロウンドーゼロがすきです。ウプダエト（****update)****はおねがいします！****. I wouldn't necessarily call him a flake, to not be able to keep in touch with someone he felt very strongly about, just because his ex is worried about his new boyfriend acting badly to the situation, could come off as just another excuse to not see him. I guess in Q's mind, it's just that, an excuse. But I guess he is ignorant, lol.**

**Shadow of a Halo: Uh..call me dense. I didn't quite understand the first part of your review, lol. And to the end we both shall go!**

**Jenihenpen: Umm…well that was more than a hug. Uh, yeah. Yes, poor Trowa, too bad that's not the theme of the fic, otherwise I would have had a lot of fun with having him have full blown mia. O well, I'm better at writing ana.**

**Ice-Ari: Yeppers, I'd been anticipating that too – well here's your answer.**

**Silverie: Thank you, I feel real bad for such a long gap between updates! I really tried to make this longer, like last time; to compensate for time. **

**Sydney: Grr..I didn't update soon, you all keep rubbing that in! lol, hope you continue reading.**

**Heero-Ace: Glad you like it, hopefully I didn't lose too many readers through that long gap.**


	8. Encounter

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, drugs, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Broke

CD: Tripp Ziggler

Most inspiring song(s): Three Steps, Insomnia, One Last Time

Artist: Broke

CD: Love is Never Enough

Most inspiring song(s): Insomnia, Lane's Song, My Sweet

Artist: A Static Lullaby

CD: …And Don't Forget to Breathe

Most inspiring song(s): Nightmares Win 6-0, Love To Hate, Hate To Me

Artist: Fly to the Sky

CD: Gravity

Most inspiring song(s): Gravity, Good-bye

Artist: The Killers

CD: Hot Fuss

Most inspiring song(s): Jenny Was a Friend of Mine

Before you read: Thanks to all who've reviewed so far! Props to you all! And there is an important note in the A/N, so look for that.

He was running, faster and faster, breath coming in harsh rasps. So far he'd almost been hit by a car twice, slammed past a couple who had been taking the curb at the wrong time, and had managed to find himself downtown. The streetlights were blurred, and it was a bright sunny day, warm and light. In a distorted haze, Trowa found himself in front of a small grocery store. He walked in feeling the air conditioner hit his heated form in a gust as the glass doors slid open. Mind still racing he began pacing the isles until a familiar voice spoke out to him. Stopping as he turned around to face the counter, surprised by the familiar face that greeted him.

"Trowa? We haven't seen you here in ages!" The old cashier exclaimed.

"How have you been? Or for that matter, where have you been?" The elderly man inquired.

"I moved." Trowa said quietly, a sudden feeling of dread spread throughout his body. He was only a block away from Wufei's apartment.

"It's nice to see you too, may I ask what time is it?" Trowa asked; throat parched from thirst and the overwhelming sense of panic coursing through his veins.

"A little after eleven." The man replied.

"Thanks." Trowa breathed, as he felt in the pocket of his hoodie and retrieved his wallet. Quickly opening it and searching through it he discovered he had a little over forty dollars. More than enough, for a drink and some food, to sustain his tired body. He peered inside the glass window of the refrigerator, and almost struck the glass door as a sudden wave of dizziness hit him hard. He could feel his lungs rattling each time he breathed. _Shit!_ He hissed mentally. He knew that something had been feeling off last night. He was sick, and to make matters worse he had no place to go. He couldn't go back to the apartment, couldn't face Heero after that embarrassing display of weakness. However, the one person he really couldn't face was Quatre. He was afraid of him, afraid that what he had just interpreted was true, but apart of him wanted to believe that Heero truly did have feelings for him. And at that moment, that was all he could hold onto to keep his sanity from slipping.

He heard the bell ring as the automatic door slid open revealing the one figure he was all too familiar with. His heart pounded furiously in his chest, thundering in his ears as he ducked behind the snack aisle. _He's here! He's fucking here! I have to hide, have to get out, have to…_His hand hit something hard in the pocket of his pants. Pulling the small object from his pants he recognized the item to be his cell phone. _I can call Heero! _He felt the tears spring to his eyes, burning as he forced them back. _I can't call him…I can't! _He mentally sobbed, hand gripping the cell phone tighter in his slick grasp. He had to find a way out of the store, without Wufei spotting him.

The footsteps were heading toward the back of the store toward the liquor beverages, Trowa used this opportunity to quickly crouch and move toward the opposite side of the store. He switched aisles as he peaked his head over the top of the aisle, quickly spying Wufei heading toward his aisle. He backed up toward the front of the aisle turning, just in time to see Wufei's back as he barely passed him. Using this momentum he began to make a direct beeline toward the exit, heart thudding heavily. He was racked with the urge to vomit from how scared and nervous he felt. He noticed the old clerk re-stocking some of the cigarette packs from behind the counter. Back conveniently turned to him. He had just managed to make it past the first aisle closest to the door when he heard Wufei's voice resound from the back of the store, except this time he was in the middle of the aisle.

"Hey, old man, are you seriously out of Red Bull?"

Trowa watched as the old man turned to address his former abuser.

"Afraid so, kid's these days – they're addicted to that stuff."

"But it's only 11:20!" Wufei sounded agitated.

"We'll have some in this afternoon, if you come back later, I'll be sure to have some for you." The clerk assured kindly.

From where he was crouched, he couldn't tell if Wufei was watching the clerk or browsing some of the other aisles. He pulled his hoodie over his head, placing the cell phone in the pocket of his hoodie. He took a chance to briefly look up and locate Wufei's location before turning on his heels and heading directly for the exit. _One, two, three…_He mentally breathed as he continued toward the sliding glass doors.

"Leaving so soon?" The clerk called out just as the doors had slid open.

Trowa felt beads of sweat form on his forehead, as he gave a side twist, back directed toward Wufei. He couldn't answer or less Wufei would recognize his voice. Fortunately as a slow afterthought, his quickly forming sickness plagued him with a wave of harsh loud coughs, he lost his voice and attempted to speak, however his words came out in a croaked whisper. The clerk, surprised by the sudden illness, quickly gave him a reassuring smile.

"Don't force yourself to talk if you're not feeling well, go on." The man smiled at him. "Before your condition gets worse. I guess this is goodbye for now."

Trowa gave the man a smile and waved. Before, quickly retreating out the door and down the block toward one of the more crowded sidewalks. He made it to a bus station, body and mind still in shock from the emotional adrenaline still coursing through his veins. He felt unbelievably sick, both mentally and physically. He wanted to go home, wanted Heero to take him home. He boarded a bus that would take him to the school. Once seated, he rested his still hooded face on the palms of his hands as his elbows dug sharply into his lower thighs. He was stressed beyond belief, and finally, unable to keep the overwhelming emotions down, he allowed himself to cry silently in the back of the bus.

It was already past two o'clock in the afternoon and the apartment was dead silent. The three occupants left to their own thoughts and emotions. Heero had tried phoning all the places that Trowa might head to, even phoning the gym. His search had come up empty handed. Duo had left for a couple hours trying a search by foot. He had found no trace of his best friend anywhere. It was as if Trowa had just disappeared. He had forced himself to think of all the possible places that Trowa, given his current situation, might have headed. Unfortunately that had ended fruitlessly as well. It wasn't until 2:15pm that Duo had suggested that Heero stay at the apartment in case Trowa called and needed to be picked up. Quatre would have to stay as well. He had one last place he had to check. It was very unlikely, precisely why Duo felt that he had to give it a shot. He headed off in the direction of Burmens High.

He never should have allowed Quatre to come. Heero rubbed his temples as he sat on the bed in the master bedroom. _I should have said no! _He thought angrily. _I knew he wasn't ready, this is all my fault! If only I had thought this through further, he might still be here. _Fear gripped him as the reality that Trowa was out there alone hit him hard. He didn't trust Trowa alone, not after…he shook his head as a set of unwanted memories flooded back in waves. He closed his eyes as a flash of blood, stark against the tiled bathroom floor flickered against the darkness. He opened them, no longer seeing the room around him, but re-living the memory of finding Trowa in the bathroom of their apartment.

That afternoon, Heero had wanted to surprise Trowa by taking him out to a new restaurant he had seen a couple blocks away from his office building. As he had stepped inside the apartment, calling out Trowa's name, the place had seemed so silent. The silence however was not welcoming, nor relaxing, it was disturbing. He knew something was wrong.

He called out again, receiving only silence in return. He passed the living room heading down the hall, toward the master bedroom. Finding the door slightly ajar, he pushed it open silently before stepping inside the room. The room felt out of place, it seemed dimmer than usual, and the air smelt faintly of metallic, almost like blood. He paused, feeling an icy chill swell up within his abdomen, causing his chest to tighten in response. His hands became sweaty and he crept slowly toward the bathroom door. It was closed. He took a deep breath to steady himself as he braced himself for whatever he would find inside the bathroom. His heart thudded loudly in his ears, pulsating throughout his body as he drew his hand toward the doorknob, opening the door with a slight click.

Heero took a step back startled beyond belief by the sight before him. The blood was pooling around his lover's form, darkening with exposure to the air, already caking on the white tiled floor. He was half dressed, lower body covered in a pair of worn jeans the lower side of his thighs were drenched in aging blood.

Heero shook his head as he continued to force the memories away. He gulped back the wave of nausea that gripped his stomach. He was frightened of the possibilities that he may never see his lover alive again. It plagued his darkest fears and nightmares. He looked at the clock it was already close to 3:00 pm. He stared at the door willing it to move, for it to open and reveal his lover. The door remained motionless like the unsettling worry that plagued the Japanese man's thoughts and emotions.

He sat on the sidewalk in front of the expansive student parking lot. Suppressing very few coughs that rattled in his chest. Never straying too far from a conveniently placed trashcan, Trowa wished that the disgusting mucus that caught in his lungs would just evaporate and disappear. This wasn't the case however, and Trowa found himself longing for his bed and more so his pillow. He had been plagued with a heavy dizziness that felt like a heavy weight had been placed over his entire body. He gave a soft moan of pain as he rested his heated face against his knees. He felt another massive buildup of coughs as he covered his mouth with his arm, feeling as though his throat was being ripped and torn by the abusive coughing. It hurt, but he no longer felt as if he couldn't speak.

Hearing approaching footsteps, he only wrapped his arms to cover the rest of his face that wasn't covered by his knees. The footsteps drew closer before stopping next to him.

"I've come to take you home." Duo stated. Amethyst eyes watching Trowa's unhealthy state from afar had dropped any sense of humor he had been trying to muster up since beginning his search for the runaway youth.

"I don't want to walk." Trowa whispered tiredly. He was relieved that Duo was there, he felt more relaxed. Duo wouldn't leave him.

"Okay." Duo said softly dropping down on the sidewalk next to Trowa.

"Do you have a cell phone?" He questioned lightly.

Trowa pulled out the cell phone before handing it to Duo, his hand shaking with pure exhaustion; the adrenaline had finally worn off.

Duo just gently pulled Trowa down so that his head rested on his lap.

"You scared us so bad." Duo said softly as he dialed the number for the apartment. He had memorized it a while ago when Trowa had first given it to him. It was better to be safe than sorry he had reasoned at the time, now he fully aware that this was true.

"I'm sorry." Trowa whispered miserably. The dehydration caused dizziness formed into a painful throbbing headache. It hurt Trowa to keep his eyes open and allow the bright vivid day to send shooting pains in the back of his head and behind his eyes. The pressure was overbearing.

"Shh, don't be. I knew this was a stupid idea." Duo muttered darkly as the faint ringing could be heard from over the cell.

"Knew?" Trowa questioned softly.

"Yeah, I knew." Duo answered with a sigh. "Heero told me not to say anything, if I had known you'd react so badly, I definitely would have said something to you." He looked at the cell with a slight frown. Why wasn't anyone picking up?

"I didn't want to come between the two of you." He said softly, looking down at Trowa.

"I always mess things up" Trowa sighed as his eyes began to fall shut, though he forced himself to keep awake.

"No, you don't." Duo said with a smile, as he noticed a familiar Lincoln Navigator heading toward the parking lot. "I guess we didn't need the cell anyway." Duo pointed at the approaching vehicle with a feeling of relief that this ordeal, for now, was over with.

The car pulled up without further notice, the driver's side door swung open immediately.

"I couldn't wait." Was all the response Duo got as Heero shot out of the car and kneeled down to check on Trowa. Of course he had informed Quatre and Heero where he was headed – It would have been illogical to not inform them of his whereabouts in case either party found Trowa first.

"Hi." Trowa said softly, adverting his eyes toward the car instead of Heero's piercing gaze.

"Hey." Heero smiled gently, "You ready to come home?" His hand pulled the hood off, exposing Trowa's auburn hair.

Trowa nodded as Heero picked him up, he was vaguely aware of Duo trailing along behind them. Heero gently placed him down in the back seat, where Trowa curled in on his side using the soft leather cushion as a pillow. He heard the door close, and felt the car shift as two occupants loaded the front driver's and passenger seat. The car started with a low hum and with expert ease slid out of the parking lot and headed toward the apartment.

"He doesn't look too good." Duo commented softly, as he looked over his shoulder at Trowa's sleeping form.

"No kidding." Heero smiled grimly, "He just had a scare, I'm sure if we just give him a couple hours he'll feel a bit better. It's obvious that he doesn't trust me, so for now, if we just let him see that there isn't anything he has to worry about, he'll calm down."

"No, that wasn't what I meant, well there is that, but I think he's sick." Duo tried to clarify.

"Sick? How so?" Heero was immediately alert, his focus rested solely on Duo.

"He was coughing quite a lot when I first came across him, besides he's acting way too tired for someone who has just run about two miles to get to Burmens High." Duo continued. "Once we get him home, we need to discuss the whole Quatre situation, now that we've all witnessed Tro's general reaction to Blondie… we have to think of a plan, a strategy. We have to include Tro in it, this time. No more what ifs, we have to give him some control."

They sat in silence for a while, until they pulled up in the apartment's side garage. Duo knew that there was something off and he could feel it. Quatre greeted them quietly, after checking to see if Trowa really was asleep.

"How is he?" He whispered, attempting to lift the uncomfortable silence.

"Tired and sick." Heero continued toward the bedroom, Trowa safely bundled in his arms.

Duo looked at Quatre before slowly turning toward the couch. He climbed on it, bringing his legs up toward his chest. The end of his braid finding itself twisted between his fingers. Duo had a feeling that the worst was over for today, but for some reason it didn't give any comfort.

A/N: I've been having major ED problems right now ?. It's becoming overly obsessive. It's affecting everything. Even the time for writing out chapters. So for right now I'm issuing a preliminary **ED WARNING** for this fic. And by definition of ED, this means that this fic will be broaching the topic of eating disorders. This was not the original plan for this fic, the bulimia was supposed to be an underlining part of the fic that was not going to be addressed. But during this time, I feel that, though it will be minor; it won't be that obtrusive to the fic's entirety. Your understanding would be much appreciated. Remember I live for reviews ?. I'll be getting to chapter 9 shortly.

**Comments: For my 11 reviewers!**

**Zakai: Since you commented twice, I'm just gonna say what's on my mind right now. Loved the new chapter! Loved it so much! I can't wait for you to update, I need to know what's gonna happen when Tro enters the room! It's driving me mad! ****, it was a fluke that I tied Relena in.****I actually had forgotten that I had Relena in the fic and when I realized this I thought I was doomed. Luckily it all worked out, I should really remember the characters I'm working with in the future. **

**Cardcaptor Soldier: You're welcome, glad you liked it!**

**Silverlie: Well, I'm having a bit of ED problems – so more trouble lies ahead for Trowa. I will attempt to get a couple chapters out quicker? Eh, I'm not promising anything, they won't be long if I do.**

**Shadow of a Halo: Keep reading; hopefully the next chapters will be easier.**

**Shadow of a Halo (again): No, no. lol I confused myself with that one. I didn't know if you were referring to a character when you mentioned poor guy (or gal), now I know you were referring to me. Problem solved, lol. I'm a gal by the way.**

**Zakai: Actually I was gonna have a better cliffhanger, but I didn't want to be cruel, and it would have been way too abrupt. I'll just save the abruptness for a different chapter. Watch out! Scold them all you want, I've been scolding them in every chapter, lol. Thank you for helping me overcome that little "I should end this now!" breakdown. Being sick has its benefits….well, when it comes to writing, that is. **

**Jenihenpen: I'm glad you adored them (smiles happily/ smugly) I took your advice, but just to let you know all my chapters are saved word documents on my computer. Even if this fic were to be taken down, I could just repost it again; maybe even edit it a little. Hopefully that won't happen, since I'm a naturally lazy person! Hopefully you'll enjoy the next couple chapters I produce too. This is turning into a more suspenseful fic than I originally thought it'd be.**

**Deaths Fallen Angel: (laughs evilly) O there will be plenty more written, don't know when yet, but many more chapters to come! Didn't like that cliffhanger, now did you? Lol. Stick around, and see where this goes.**

**Darksaphire: Funny you should say that, along time ago I was into the whole 3x5. That's actually a real nice pairing. I actually have that pairing saved for a later project – I blame it on this awesome fic called Ordinary World by…. something genesis (sighs) been too long. I'll find it and if I remember, I'll post the author's name or a link…even though it's not a 3x5 that lasts; it's an awesome fic anyway. (I RECOMMEND TO ALL!) Keep reading!**

**No one: Well, lets just say I'll continue…. keep reading and someday you might get that soon.**

**Ht: Plenty of more to come! I'd like to think that it'll stay good, too. **


	9. Slipping

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Alkaline Trio

Album: Crimson

Most inspiring song(s): Burn

Artist: Silverchair

Album: Neon Ballroom

Most inspiring song(s): Ana's Song (Open Fire), I Miss You Love

As Duo continued to sit on the couch, absentmindedly playing with the tip of his braid, Quatre remained standing in front of the door. Almost as if pacing back and forth would cause a chain-synchronization with the clock. Time had ceased and the awkwardness of the situation was suffocating.

"Did he say anything about me?" Quatre asked quietly, slowly addressing Duo.

"No." Duo answered briskly.

"You think this is my fault" Quatre sighed.

"Oh it isn't? If you hadn't been so insistent on coming over, we may have avoided this little fiasco." Duo spat, irritated by this situation and unable to come to terms with who he was more angered at, himself, Heero, or Quatre.

"Heero never talked about Trowa's issues, I didn't know if he was over-exaggerating or not!"

"Why the hell would he over-exaggerate it?" Duo asked a bit heatedly.

"It's the reason we broke up!" Quatre spat back, "He never told me anything, never interacted or engaged in conversations – I knew hardly anything about him!"

Duo looked back down at the floor, sighing heavily.

Both turned their attention toward the hallway as Heero emerged from the master bedroom. Overhearing the two bickering, he gave both worn out males a smile.

"Just keep aggravating the other, don't you two." He chuckled.

"How is he?" Duo asked, his expression changing from one of embarrassment to worry.

"He's just worn out, I figure he'll be asleep for a couple hours, he may or may not reappear later on tonight." Heero shrugged.

"You're not worried?" Quatre questioned, eyes calculating slightly.

"I was worried, but he's home now. He's safe here." Heero took a seat on the arm of the couch.

"It's not that simple" Quatre pressured, "He's unstable mentally, you have to work that out with him."

"Really Quatre, I'm not naïve, nor am I that dense." Heero's eyes narrowed slightly. "But I can't work with him, until he approaches me with the issues. If I push him, he'll mostly likely do a repeat of this episode."

"Ah, so is that the reason that you have Duo here? To use him as a pawn to get Trowa to open up to you?" Quatre eyed Duo and then caught Heero's sharpened gaze.

"You and I both know that that's not it, Duo is Trowa's best friend, and he has had a remarkably good influence on him. Leave Duo out of this. The reason he's staying here is none of your concern."

"Really? You expect me to believe that? Since when did you start opening your home to complete strangers? Taking in homeless teens that have been battered up a bit and taking care of them? Why the sudden change, huh? You used to be so different, so unemotional, and so uptight! And I'm supposed to go along with this, just because of a chance encounter with Trowa turned out to have caused you to change your entire lifestyle and personality? That doesn't happen Heero. You called that night and said that he was dying, and then the next month you say that the both of you have moved in together. What changed?" Quatre pleaded in a strained voice.

"Please leave." Heero said softly.

"He's seventeen, he's not worth the time or effort! You're ruining yourself by having to put up with someone as dependent and unhealthy."

"Get out!" Heero growled. Standing up and opening the door.

"You're willing to risk our friendship for him?" Quatre looked at Heero with a strong gaze, truly seeing how much Trowa had affected him.

" I'll go, but answer me this. Why do you love him so much?"

"He's seen me." Heero whispered, "You just wouldn't understand."

"You're right, I don't" Quatre whispered as he grabbed his suitcases and walked out the door.

He opened his eyes, and continued to stare at the ceiling. _What a mess_, he thought silently. He had freaked out and had known that he had been completely irrational, but he had absolutely no control over his reactions. His thoughts trailed off until he remembered Quatre. How was he supposed to compete with Quatre? The golden haired Winner heir had everything, wealth, personality, and looks. Trowa did not like the fact that Quatre was indeed good looking, but what held his train of thought was something that he had been trying to suppress for months. He was jealous. He was jealous of his lover, his best friend, and now his lover's ex-boyfriend's bodies.

He loved Heero but wished that he could be just as well built; he was beyond envious of Duo's thighs, and Quatre's tiny frame sent him into a wave of self-hatred. He looked at people at school, saw their bodies and imagined what it would be like to be that thin. He labeled people who he didn't even know, complete strangers were judged without knowledge. They were either thin, or fat. And when he looked at himself in the mirror, all he saw was fat. He hated his image, cursed his reflection, spent hours constantly thinking about his weight, his body, his imperfections.

The self-hatred continued to plague him with such intensity that he had to bite back the tears and pained, agonizing screams of frustration that swelled within him each time he stared at the mirror too long. He wanted to be perfect, wanted to be everything Heero wanted, however it would never be for Heero and he knew it. It was for him, he wanted to be in control of something. He needed to be in control. And really that was all that mattered. He had already gone from a low 120 pounds to a declining115 pounds. He was currently maintaining his weight. Heero was already suspicious, now even more so, considering his recent behavior.

Oddly enough, the coughing had vanished, though he knew it would only be a temporary relief. However he was left with a weak and sore body, desperately in need of rest. His eating habits had already sent his body into a weakened state, depriving him of several hours of sleep a night. Starvation left him restless at night and brought with it the constant desire to binge. These late night refrigerator raids had ended when Duo had started staying, but had done nothing to stop Trowa from purging every meal he ate.

His battle with food was never ending, it's ceaseless tormenting imbedded his mind every waking second. He was consciously aware that he was ill, that this was dangerous, but he no longer cared. He wanted to have control over his life, some stability. He longed to like himself, to see the person that Heero told him he was.

He also realized that this sudden wave of illness was brought on by his weakened immune system that left him more perceptible to illnesses.

However the idea of being sick brought a disturbing amount of happiness to his darkened mind. It was just an easier excuse to avoid food all together.

Slowly standing up he fought off the wave of dizziness as he made his way to the bathroom, shedding his clothes on the tile floor as he stepped on the scale.

113. 2

A small smile grew across his lips. He'd reach his goal. He'd be thin.

As he got dressed his mind slowly addressed the current situation. He'd just jeopardized his relationship with Heero. He obviously had freaked Duo out and he didn't have the right words to explain himself. Heero would never understand his reasoning for doing the things he did. For reacting in that manner, nor would he believe that Trowa trusted him.

_Screw up_. His mind hissed at him.

He turned and looked at the mirror.

_Hideous_.

His mind looked past the defining rib cage and the sculpted collarbones. He let his fingers roam across his stomach, lifting his shirt and pulling at the loose skin on his almost caved in stomach. He focused on that pinch of skin, the paranoia creating a wave of fear and disgust. He was still so fat. Why would Heero ever want him? How could he stand looking at him? Duo must surely be appalled by his appearance as well.

_No_ he thought softly, _they don't see this, they don't care. I'm the only one that cares about this. _

Emerald eyes trailed up to his face where he saw tear stained cheeks. A pale hand went to scrub at his irritated eyes. He felt numb.

Checking his face a final time, he pulled his jacket back on and crept into the hallway.

Heero remembered his life with Quatre and how he had never felt truly satisfied. The bond between Quatre and himself had always felt awkward. He truly felt that Quatre was the one who had put all the time and energy into the relationship. Insisting that Heero loved him, and that he just wasn't used to expressing his feelings.

Deep down Heero knew that he didn't really love Quatre the way that Quatre believed. He was a close friend, closer than most, but Quatre didn't really know him. Not in the way a lover should. Nor did he ever take the time to test him or see what he was really about.

But Trowa had.

Unexpectedly, the relationship between Trowa and him was formed within the two-week stay at the hospital. Heero hadn't wanted to admit it, but he had already fallen for Trowa by the time they had moved in.

The week he was released from the hospital, Heero had arrived to take him home. Trowa had still been acting albeit a bit timidly, but still weary of Heero's true intentions. Heero had argued that Trowa had no place to go, and that whoever had done the original damage to him would more than likely be out looking for him. That he had no intentions of hurting Trowa in any way or form. Though the sudden move in ultimately lead to Trowa's first suicide attempt, his feelings didn't waver.

His advances however left Trowa incredibly standoffish. Since he was also very weak from his previous ordeal, it was easier to learn a bit about Trowa without the boy getting stressed.

During this time Trowa was also emaciated, weighing in at an alarming ninety-five pounds. However he had gained fifteen pounds during the first three months. Surprisingly, Trowa had gained fairly quickly. This was blamed on Wufei's former restricting of Trowa's diet. Since his restrictions had further caused Trowa's disorder to grow, Trowa had at first gone from forced to eating very little, to purposefully eating nothing. This caused Trowa's weight to fluctuate very easily. Metabolism was also a factor. Trowa already had a naturally fast metabolism which had actually helped him in his days at the circus. However it had slowed down a bit as his body reached into the nineties. This however was brought on by the unbalanced and constantly changing intakes and exercise Trowa was allowed.

Trowa's metabolism changed immediately once he was admitted into the hospital. Regaining its former speed, which made gaining quite difficult. Liquids were used to hydrate his dehydrated form. Liquid weight along with a now steady diet caused Trowa to gain about ten pounds before he was released. The second month would lead to the ultimate gain of weight.

During the first month, Heero and Trowa acted a bit awkward. Trowa continued to stay cautious around Heero, however he was intrigued with Heero's lifestyle. It wasn't until he had come across a magazine that had Heero's face on it, that Trowa was immediately taken aback. This had caused a tiny issue in the relationship, Trowa obviously feeling unworthy of being with the owner of a multi-billion dollar company. They had gotten past that issue after a week. However this didn't help Trowa's curiosity to grow. Before either of them new it, a very strong bond had grown. Which ultimately lead to an outwardly affectionate relationship. This relationship was formed throughout the five months since the incident that had brought them together had occurred.

Trowa had been a welcome relief from his regular life. Trowa's youthful and kind nature was ultimately what drew Heero to want to spend time with him and make sure the boy was okay. Trowa became more confident and actually became more affectionate during the last 3 months. Heero allowed a fair amount of freedom and took the liberty of setting up safe spots in case he did anything that would scare Trowa off for a bit. However he hadn't gotten over the bathroom incident, and had taken away sharp objects in the bathroom as well as around the house for the first two months. This was temporary, but let Trowa know that Heero was indeed concerned for his health and wellbeing.

There was a definite difference between his relationship with Quatre and his relationship with Trowa. With Quatre he felt confined and felt awkward and not as happy. His relationship with Trowa however enabled a sometimes stressful, working relationship. Both of them making the decisions and interacting as a normal couple to the best of both their abilities. With Trowa, Heero could experience a life that had been deprived from him from an early age. Trowa didn't judge him and wasn't with him for the money that came with being involved with him. He liked the fact that he could be himself and that Trowa didn't mind, that he enjoyed being with him. Trowa actually took the time to learn what Heero liked and enjoyed doing. Quatre had always pushed him into doing everything. Trowa made sure to occupy himself when Heero had work to do. Quatre would make a fuss that Heero spent way too much time working, and not enough time with him, considering that both their schedule's hardly allowed free time.

Heero could be intimate with Trowa on a physical and verbal level. He shared his thoughts with Trowa and had in depth conversations at times. Their physical relationship had started during the third month. Surprisingly, Trowa had initiated it. After their first time, just lying with Trowa in his arms, he knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him.

"Baka" Heero whispered at the closed door. Before turning toward the couch where Duo was sitting awkwardly.

"I apologize for my outburst" Heero said distractedly. _This day is going so horribly wrong_ he thought tiredly.

"No need to apologize." Duo said softly, staring at the floor.

Both relapsed into silence unaware of the third figure lingering in the hallway.

_Thirst_. Trowa's tired mind called. _Water_.

He lurked through the hallway, watching as his lover apologized for some unknown reason. He stopped suddenly as he remembered Quatre. Was he ready to face Quatre again? For that matter was he ready to face Heero at the moment? As he stood there in fear of what to do, he ignored the fact that a massive buildup of coughs, were already steadily forming in his chest.

The force of the first cough ripping its way out of his throat sent him straight to the floor, hand over his mouth in case any of the mucus or saliva came up. This in turn unveiled his location, resulting in Heero appearing a little too quickly, concern written clearly on his face. Trowa was more than disgusted when the coughing ended, his hand was slimy and he felt dirty, because of the effects of being sick. His throat was raw and though he desperately craved water, he didn't think he'd manage to drink anything with the amount of mucus still in his throat and lungs. He was more than tempted to purge in order to rid himself of more of bacterial infested mucus, however he didn't think that would go over well with Heero standing just a few feet away holding a handful of toilet paper.

Standing on weak legs he rested his waist against the counter of the sink, he felt like blacking out any second, he felt very drained and exhausted. Heero turned the faucet on and allowed Trowa to wash his hands as he rinsed the excess mess off of his mouth and dried off with the toilet paper.

Knowing that he wasn't going to be awake much longer he grabbed his cup and filled it with water as he forced the cool liquid down his throat, at first it felt and tasted sickening, but the overall need for liquid took control. Having finished off two glasses of water his already closing eyes were forced to concentrate on Heero. The silent understanding between the two was completed the moment Heero picked Trowa up. At the moment Heero didn't really feel the sudden difference of how light Trowa was beginning to feel.

Gently placing Trowa on the bed, Heero checked his temperature, unhappy to see that thermometer read 102.6 degrees. At this point, Trowa was already nodding off, his weakened and exhausted body, finally giving into a fever induced sleep.

Heero glanced at the clock as it turned 4:30 pm. He was mentally exhausted and knew to check with Duo before taking a brief rest. He left the room and found Duo already lying down on the couch.

"It's about 4:30, I'm going to retire to the bedroom, if you get hungry or need anything you can either come tell me or just go right ahead and make something for yourself."

Duo nodded in understanding, before he began to untie his shoes.

"I also want to thank you for what you did today, I'm sorry things worked out the way they did."

"We can just be thankful that we found him." Duo smiled tiredly. "I'm going to crash for a while, so don't worry about me." Duo said lightly as he laid his head on the pillow.

Giving a brief parting nod, Heero returned to the bedroom, stripping off his shirt and shoes before climbing into bed. His mind felt relieved by the welcome silence of the apartment and the evened out breathing beside him. He shut his eyes and let out a soft sigh as he relaxed his tense muscles. Sleep claiming him a moment later.

Duo let out a puff of air as he curled up on his side, pulling one of the comforters over his shoulder. As he fell asleep to complete silence, his dreams brought him back to a place that he had tried to forget, a place where all he could hear were the sounds of his screaming and the drunken laughter of a man he tried to forget.

A/N: Okay…. I haven't disappeared. Where have I been? I've just been lazy. I wrote this with no ideas whatsoever in my mind. But you can forget about the ED being minor. By the way, Trowa is a bulimarexic, not a bulimic. Actually by making it a frontal or general underlining focus it will help me a lot with the oncoming chapters. But before we move on to the comments.

I'M SO SORRY! I CAN'T BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW SORRY AND APOLOGETIC I AM RIGHT NOW! I re-read…. well, tried to anyway, my previous chapters and it just blew me away. I have so many god damn mistakes it really caught me off guard. I mean the amount of "they're" and "their" mistakes is unforgivable. So please point these out to me, it really is just so damn pathetic, I guess I need someone to proof read chapters for me…I'm so embarrassed and ashamed.

**Comments: for my 11 Reviewers!**

**No One: Let's hope there are more of those to come. **

**Zakai: I have to say this once and for all! I DO KNOW THE NAME OF YOUR STORY! IT'S CALLED DEAD GROUND! I'm not an idiot (sobs) I'm sorry that I keep spelling it wrong! I'm sorry, I just am so peeved that I spelt it wrong – not once, but TWICE, to my knowledge. I'm really disappointed in myself. Anyway I'm thrilled that you updated! But I'm not going to go into that right now since I haven't left you a review yet. But I read it the day it came out…I was into full metal alchemist but I only got so far and then I tried to get the downloads to work on my computer but the damn things kept freezing and pissing me off so I know nothing! One day I'll see the end! Yes cliffhangers….I'd like to be evil when I have a story that I feel would give the most suspense if I added them. However I'm the type who loves to do the most abrupt endings. I have yet to show an example though…maybe I'll do one sometime? I'm glad you thought that the chapter turned out okay. I guess I was a bit pleased with the store encounter scene. I tried to make it so that it would make the reader feel the suspense of the situation. Maybe it worked?**

**Deaths Fallen Angel: Yes, damn Wufei, damn him! Lol. Keep reading!**

**Jenihenpen: Aww, I'm glad you like my fic! Don't hurt me though, for not updating in such a long time. But it's the guilt that made me update…Keep reading! **

**Devil1: You just had to say that when I had the longest wave of writers block and laziness imaginable. **

**Ht: Now it's a bad thing to put hopes into this fic, I'm will not be responsible for loss of hope. **

**Silverlie: Glad you like it, Trowa angst? More like Trowa torture, lol. Ironic that you should say that and then have this fic suddenly stop. **

**Ratlover: Glad you liked the first 2 chapters. Hope you continue reading. **

**Lady-Frisselle: Hey thanks, I was hoping the characters wouldn't seem too off or unbelievable, considering the setting I have them placed in. However I didn't do too well in this chapter. Hope you continue reading. **

**Sakura Blossom-Cilla-85: If only things were that simple, ne? Hope you continue reading!**

**Ratlover: (again) Aren't you the lucky one, that I just happened to be finishing this chapter when I got your review. Glad you like this fic and I hope you continue reading, unfortunately this wasn't a really suspenseful chapter. O well, you got your update :smiles:**


	10. Drowning

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Alkaline Trio

Album: Crimson

Most inspiring song(s): Burn

Artist: **Coheed and Cambria**

Album: Good Apollo I'm Burning Star IV: From Fear Through The Eyes Of Madness

Most inspiring song(s): **Welcome Home, The Suffering**

Artist: The Rasmus

Album: Dead Letters

Most inspiring song(s): In the Shadows, Guilty, Not like the other girls

Artist: 30 Seconds To Mars

Album: A Beautiful Lie

Most inspiring song(s): The Kill, The Story, A Modern Myth

**This chapter is dedicated to Lady-Frisselle and Your Seraphim for proofing, arigato!**

He was running, breath coming in pants as he hurled himself toward the door and ran past the bed, heading toward the closet. His young body pressed up against the corner of the closet as he pulled random objects of clothing close in an attempt to cover himself. His long loose hair falling in his face and cascading down his trembling shoulders as he tried desperately to keep his breathing quiet as he heard the low shuffle of feet against the carpet grow nearer.

The sound of an almost empty glass bottle clinking against the door as the person entered the room, low breathing and a few muffled growls, sent his heart racing painfully in his chest. A wave of nausea hit him strong as he bit down on his lip hard as he held his breath.

The closet door opened as he closed his eyes painfully tight.

"Get out." The low growl was the only warning he had as the man lunged forward with unanticipated speed, grabbing his arm harshly as he yanked him out of the closet.

"Duo?" came the soft whisper as he felt himself jolt awake with a painful gasp, dilated eyes adjusting to the living room and resting on Trowa's concerned face.

"Tro." He stated, willing his voice to not permit the tremor of fear he was experiencing.

"Dream?" Came the calm inquiry, as Trowa lowered himself to the ground. In all their time together he'd never seen Duo display any outward sign of fear, but he recognized it with out a doubt. It was in his eyes.

"Bad." Duo breathed, as he reached a hand up to comb his fingers through his hair and was startled to notice that his hand was quivering.

"What are you doing up?" He asked, biting his lower lip in habit. "You have a fever."

"It died down." Trowa murmured, raising an arm to grasp the arm of the couch, using it to pull himself up as he turned and entered the kitchen. He knew Duo wouldn't tell him unless it was on his terms and when he was ready. There was no point in trying to pry for the information.

"The Cough?" Duo called after him.

"Stopped breathing." Came the soft reply as Trowa returned holding two glasses of water. He handed one to Duo as he took a large gulp of his own, a wince spreading across his face immediately after he finished.

Meeting Duo's curious stare, he offered an emphasized reply.

"Disgusting."

"Serves you right for getting sick."

"You sound like Heero."

"Great minds think alike."

"Fuck you." Trowa smiled.

"Heero'd kill me." Duo replied evenly, a gentle smirk lingering as he felt the tension from the nightmare ease.

"By the way, where is Heero?" Duo asked, watching as Trowa nodded toward the door, new lock and all.

"Out buying me meds." Trowa sighed.

"You two make too big a fuss." He winked at Duo.

"Just wait until you faint again, then we'll talk."

"Hn." Trowa smiled, as he turned to head down the hall, allowing Duo to trail after him.

"What should I wear?" Trowa murmured, as he rummaged in his side of the closet, a couple belts, ragged jeans, striped pants and a pile of tanks of various colors littered the floor of the closet, a few jackets remained on the hangers that hadn't fallen into the mess.

"You mean you actually plan out your outfits? And here I thought you threw on whatever was in the hamper." Duo mocked as he sat at the edge of Trowa's bed.

"Ever consider that that was my intent?" Trowa asked softly as he grabbed a black hooded sweatshirt and a pair of ragged grey sweats. Taking another swift look around, he swiped a white tank, which he proceeded to carry into the bathroom.

On the edge of the bed Duo fidgeted a bit uncomfortably, he wanted to talk to Trowa, be as open as his friend had been with him, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. How could he bring that up? Knowing what Trowa had been through.

His mind flashed back to the club and the figure at the bar, feeling his resolve weaken. _How could it have been him?_ He felt himself shiver as a cold dread enveloped him. _I killed him_.

"How the hell did I get myself into this?" Zechs moaned as he sunk into his bed, pale blond strands turned a light shade of off-white in the moonlit room. It hadn't even been a week since his little sister had moved in. The awkwardness had arrived with her luggage, and had continued to settle in along with her. She wasn't a nuisance, nor did she intrude on his personal matters. It was her damn silence that caused him to stress.

What type of relationship did they have? So far their only encounters were brief words of greeting as they passed each other in the hall or when they decided on meals. Neither felt the need to start up a conversation considering they didn't know what to say. So they ignored each other as necessary. Awkward.

He let his mind wander as he continued to gaze at the white ceiling above him.

_Duo._

Sighing, he mentally asked, _So what about Duo?_

He hadn't seen Heero's new houseguest since that night, but that hadn't stopped him from thinking about the amethyst-eyed boy. Indeed, he was curious about the boy, wanted to learn more about him, wanted to see him again. He didn't understand why he was so transfixed on Duo in particular, but he didn't ignore the fact that he was attracted to him. Though he had only seen him in the dim light of the club, his eyes and smile left him more than intrigued.

Turning on his side he allowed a dark chuckle escape his lips. Had it really been that long? Long enough to want to take a teenager to bed with him?

_No. You want what he has. _His mind voiced softly.

_You want to have what Heero has with Trowa. _

Blue eyes. A pale turquoise hue; like glass. Dolls eyes, she thought softly as she stared at the mirror in her brother's guest room.

They were tinted with the lamplight and she recognized the color to be a bright clear yellow-green. _Chlorine. _Her mind suggested.

A cold smile crept across her face. _Poison. _

She felt the smile harden as she remembered Thursday's incident. No. She wouldn't think about that right now. Balance and stability were to be her focus. She would get a grip on this. She had to.

_It truly is a small world_, she thought lightly as her fingers gripped the thin cotton material of her tank, pulling it off and over her head as she stood.

_Both of them were there._

She stripped off her pants as she entered the adjoining bathroom, leaving the clothes in a pile on the tile floor as she made her way to the bathtub. Turning the faucet on she sat lightly on the edge of the tub as it started to fill with water.

_They know Milliardo's friend. _

Feeling the moist steam surround her, she slid off her underwear and un-strapped her bra. Sinking into the water she felt the uncomfortable burn as she adjusted to the water temperature. She laid back, dunking her head in the water. Listening to the gentle gurgle of water she released a breath. Bubbles trailing to the top in a rush as the quiet calm of the water relaxed her.

_He's interesting._

Her eyes opened suddenly. Why was she thinking about him? The light gleamed across the calm surface of the water as she examined her surroundings. Her skin was pale, the water clear and tinted as she glanced at the surrounding walls of the tub.

Feeling the sudden urge for breath nagging at her she reappeared, breaking the surface in a smooth action. A large gasp for air met her ears as water dripped from her hair, a few large gulps of air rocked her chest with the labored breathing.

_His eyes are like mine. _

She abruptly stood allowing the water to rush and spill off her naked form. Stepping out of the tub she grabbed a towel from the back of the door and threw it over herself, rubbing vigorously at her body and hair. Grabbing a new pair of underwear from the dresser across from her bed, she slipped it on and slid into bed. Her body tensed as she finished her train of thought.

_Dead._

The sounds of glass shattering and a tight grip around his tiny form brought the violet-eyed seven year-old boy out of the dark grip of unconsciousness. His face burning with the compressed heat as his vision cleared on the yellow-orange flames, embers sprinkling the fire across the dark smog of smoke consuming the available oxygen. The sounds of yelling and hurried footfalls were drowned out by the quickened beat of his heart pounding in his ears like Taiko drums. He felt his eyes sting and water as the heat and smoke rushed past him and his savior.

He felt his heart stop, a tight clenching in his chest causing him to let out a frightened sob as his mind flashed to one unnerving thought.

Where was Sister Helen? 

He watched in cold dread as they were rushing toward a collapsing door and he still had no idea where Sister Helen was. Was she hurt, was she safe, or was she outside waiting for him? He felt himself tense as they hurtled out into the cool night air. Coughing began as the sudden rush of oxygen mingled with the thick smoke already inhaled inside the burning building.

He stared wide-eyed, as the church seemed to crumple and dissolve right in front of his eyes, until it was no more, laying in ashes in a smoking and blazing heap. He continued to stare, distantly registering the gruff voices of fireman as they moved away from the ruins.

"The damn thing was too old, it burned like a match the moment the flames spread." A voice growled sympathetically.

"How many were in there?" Another asked in a bewildered voice.

"From what we can tell, there had to be about twenty people trapped inside the congregational room. The fire moved too quickly, those poor souls were surrounded! The moment the second story ceiling collapsed, those still remaining would've been crushed." The man holding him stated weakly.

"Are you trying to tell me this boy's the only survivor?" The first man asked incredulously.

"I'm afraid so, poor boy." Came the soft reply as the man that held him turned his face away from the still burning cremations of bodies and wood.

"Hey kiddo, can you tell me your name?" The man asked gently.

Dead? They couldn't possibly be dead. Not all of them. Wasn't it Father Maxwell who had told him that the Maxwell Church was a house of God? God wouldn't let one of his houses and his followers burn to death would He? How could God let a Priest burn to death in His own church? Why hadn't God saved them?

A lump in his throat and the burning in the back of his eyes were held back through sure determination. He blinked as he remembered Father Maxwell's gentle baritone. _Boys don't cry_.

"Duo, Duo Maxwell." He stated, voice void of all emotion. Eyes empty and clouded as he turned his face toward the news station reporters and ambulances arriving on the devastating scene. Cameras were flashing and excited voices clipping the silent anguish from the earlier massacre.

And that's what they ended up calling it, the Maxwell Church Massacre. The day that twenty innocent victims, including eight orphans, a priest, and a nun were burned alive inside their very own church. The tragedy of that day lived on for several months because of the simple fact that this had been no accident. Someone had intentionally locked the victims inside and lit them on fire. A gruesome and horrific hate crime was slandered across the work of this disturbed mastermind. While others argued that this was an act of a deranged arsonist, or the work of a serial killer.

The irony, when they eventually found the culprit, was that this had been done as an act of God, or so the man had claimed. Clinically insane, the man had believed that he had been following orders from the Lord himself and had committed this act in God's will. "A rebirth, for those who truly worshiped Him gained salvation." He hadn't done this in spite or anger, but had merely acted on God's behalf and allowed His worshippers the chance to join Him in the great kingdom above. God had tested him.

His trial lasted one month. More for publicity than for anything else Duo had thought bitterly as he had been tossed around different foster homes. This insane man met his fate, when he was executed by an outraged citizen on the day of the initial sentencing. Duo, however, had felt that the man had gotten off too easily, despite his tender age.

"I'm sorry about this morning."

Duo jumped slightly as he came back to reality.

"I shouldn't have acted out that way. It was a stupid reaction on my part." Trowa finished as he took a seat next to Duo.

"I won't deny that you freaked me out a bit." Duo gave a nervous smile.

"What happened?" Duo asked softly, his fingers finding themselves entangled in the end of his braid.

"Incoherent thought." Trowa replied smoothly. "I have issues, he should have told me HE was coming."

"I should have told you earlier." Duo sighed.

"No, Heero knew better."

"But he's allowed to make mistakes." Duo smiled.

"If you say so." Trowa smirked.

"You really okay, now?" Duo asked seriously.

"What happened at the club?" Trowa asked in return, allowing Duo the chance to either back down or continue with the personal interrogation.

He knew Trowa was testing him so he decided to answer.

"I saw someone." He answered evenly.

"Too vague." Trowa replied in a clipped tone, standing abruptly.

"Tro wait." Duo grabbed his wrist as he stood. Acting on impulse he threw his arm around Trowa's back and pulled him into a hug.

"We both have personal demons, we just deal with them differently." Duo whispered. "Understand?"

"Then don't push me and I won't push you." Trowa stated softly. "Deal?"

"Deal." Duo smiled. Though deep inside, he felt that this was a promise that he wouldn't be able to keep.

"I'm going to go get some tissues," Trowa said abruptly. Leaving Duo calling after him as Trowa disappeared into the bathroom.

"The Cough has returned?" Duo called mockingly.

Muffled coughing and a few sounds of Trowa blowing his nose met his ears in reply.

Duo returned to his previous train of thought. He'd made a deal with Trowa that he wouldn't push or pry, but he was unsure if he'd be able to keep it.

As Trowa made his way out of the bathroom a look of exhaustion and pain crossed his handsome features.

"You wanna' lie down?" Duo asked encouragingly.

"Don't baby me, I'm not a fucking pussy." Trowa said in a dark tone that was quickly replaced with a horrified whisper.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that." Trowa looked worriedly at Duo.

Duo recognized the stance that Trowa had taken when his words had registered in his mind. He was cowering, afraid of a punishment that would've happened had he been talking to Wufei.

"I'm not him." Duo stated softly. Though internally a question was raised.

Just how much of Trowa did he really know?

"I know." Trowa breathed, as he gave Duo a shaky smile. Duo would have pressed the matter further but his own self-induced motto stopped him from prying.

_I may run and hide, but I never tell a lie._

A/N: Damn. Half of this was written months ago. How ironic it was to have caught the same damn illness that struck me before. However, that did help me remember the symptoms for Tro's illness. Anyway, I just couldn't find a way to end the chapter. Oh well fuck it, right? I was finally able to create a plot for this fic. I found it rather amusing that people have been commenting on how much they liked how the story line was developing, whether it was about characters and situations, or just plain plot. Considering I had no true story line or plot at the time, it definitely brought a smile to my face. Going back to my original train of thought, I have indeed developed a plot, so there is a reason for why these characters are being portrayed certain ways. I apologize for this taking so long to update, it definitely was not my intention to produce a chapter so many months after the last update.

And though I finished this on Halloween, Happy belated Halloween. My outfit kicked ass.

**Comments: for my 10 reviewers!**

**Clingy: I'm glad you caught on to what I'm trying to portray with this fic, hopefully it will continue to do so.**

**Jenihenpen: Hopefully you'll continue to enjoy how I illustrate these characters, hope you like the chapter.**

**No One: Oh you'll continue to see more…and more.**

**Ratlover: Seems to be my specialty lately doesn't it? Running a high on Trowa angst that is. But in all honesty he's only been having a couple rough days. **

**Zakai: Loved the new chapter (intensely), sorry I didn't get around to reviewing chap. 14, I wasn't in a healthy mindset to do so. But I will be reviewing ch.15 sometime soon. I wanted to give a brief intro into Tro's mindset, so I'm happy that it impacted you. When the ED is addressed later on and is described with more detail, I hope that the impact on the reader will be much stronger. I really want this to feel like a "kick in the gut", when this fic is all over. Yes, I really had enough with everyone saying "Trowa this, Trowa angst that." Duo is the main character and I wanted this chapter to remind the reader. Hopefully it worked? Ja matte ne.**

**Bloody eyes: Thanks for the comment, if only I could just design the bar and email you all pictures, lol. I'd be a damn good interior decorator, if I weren't so interested in computer arts new media. **

**Left Blank: Well, I'm glad that you like where it's going, lol. Aww don't be too harsh on him, he's only been like that for what? Four days? Stick around and you'll see why I made him like that.**

**Someone Special: I know you're not reading this. Yep, same Jag that I drew in Ap. **

**Lady-Frisselle: All are so down on Q. Who knows, this might be explained. Thanks for proofin' it! There were a couple things that I couldn't let go of ; I would have left the flashbacks italicized, but it seemed pretty pointless considering I've already revealed character thoughts to be strictly italicized. Also the fact that the flashbacks before hand were left alone, I thought it'd be best to just leave em'. **

**Cardcaptor Soldier: Those adventures would be pretty damn morbid, lol. Keep reading. **


	11. Invitation

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: James Blunt

Album: Back To Bedlam

Most inspiring song(s): Tears And Rain, **Out of My Mind**

Artist: Trivium

Album: Ember To Inferno

Most inspiring song(s): Requiem

Artist: 30 Seconds To Mars

Album: A Beautiful Lie

Most inspiring song(s): **Attack**, The Kill, The Story, A Modern Myth

"Are you insane? You'd be better off allowing us to continue heading this corporation. It hasn't even been a week since your parent's deaths. You're still too young, many of our employers and business associates won't be able to fathom or accept a seventeen year old as a respectable CEO. No one will take you seriously. You surely can understand how this move would bring this company crashing down. Won't you at least wait until you are at an acceptable age? You still have quite a life to make for yourself, at least allow us the chance to stabilize and secure your late father's business until you have given yourself some time to…" The man stopped as Heero placed a hand up, halting the man's words.

"It would seem that this company would take a plunge either way, my father and his idealistic goals are now dead. This company needs to be brought up to speed to ensure that it is still on top and a main competitor to many of the rivaling companies that are, more than likely, setting up for a swift comeback, as we speak. We can't allow an unfortunate drawback to risk the future of this company. I can assure you that if we were to try and secure the business from falling apart, that we would just be assisting its suicide. This corporation was running smoothly until my father's death, just because he's no longer here, doesn't mean that we can't pick up where we left off and continue with our lives. We have to think realistically."

The man's face turned flustered, a scowl crossing the aged features. "We have to think realistically? You fool; you plan on bringing this company down with you? What about us? What about our employees, the people that you are putting at risk? If you were to head this company you'd be bringing upon it sheer turmoil! And when everything has gone chaotic, what then? What will you do?"

"When everything has gone crazy, I'll believe in myself and keep fighting." Heero stated softly to the outraged vice president of Wing Enterprises. "I will be taking the head of the board, as well as the rightful place as CEO of Wing Enterprises. However I do not intend on taking this corporation down with me. With some changes and revises, this company will continue to intimidate the competition. Wing Enterprises will rise above the devastation that you and my father have inflicted upon it. If you disagree with where this company is heading, than you are more than obliged to leave." Heero stood from his seat in his late father's office.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I'll bid you good day." He stated as the former vice president looked on in shock and horror, before gaining some composure and turning swiftly to leave.

"Good day."

It had taken longer than expected to get the medication that he had ordered for Trowa, apparently the pharmacy had misread the brand and the amount specified. The mix up had been caught early on, when Heero had read the directions and felt that the dosage looked to be too high, especially for a mild case of bronchitis. He had also had to make a brief stop at the head Zero Systems Inc. building.

While he was the CEO, Heero had entrusted several qualified people to supervise the company. Heero did not interact as well with people, so he did most of his work at home or in his office, but this set up had benefited the company greatly. With smart and social supervisors overseeing the company and dealing with most associates and partners on Heero's behalf, Heero was only called in for certain matters. The work that Heero did was what made Zero Systems Inc. such a phenomenal success.

Zero Systems Inc. was the revised and former product of Wing Enterprises. Developing the newest commodities in computer software, communication, and transportation. They were the leading incorporation working in the field of science technology and computer science. As the head of the board, Heero also controlled decisions concerning the company's stock options. Which was almost unheard of, considering his young and inexperienced age.

There had been serious doubts when Heero had taken over his father's position as the head of the corporation. A good deal of the business's eldest members had quit at the beginning of Heero's tenure. The absurdity of having a seventeen year-old corporation head had gained plenty of bad press and unwanted media publicity. Heero had had a rough start, but he never deterred from the original plan for Wing Enterprises. What he needed was for Wing Enterprises a sole computer software corporation to become a multifaceted company that would present high quality, up-to-the-minute, and innovative solutions to areas that were lacking.

In order to show the world the changes that had taken place, he renamed the newly developed incorporation Zero Systems Inc. Zero Systems Incorporated was named after Heero's most accomplished product. A device able to predict any move beforehand, based on the intelligence of the occupant wearing it. However this version was not a threat to the human psyche. During its release it was used and sold specifically for computer software. It was incorporated into the software so that it was encrypted with a specific lock. It was originally developed for writing and gaming. It made its greatest success in the gaming industry, and soon was developing a series of devices for the sports industry, as well. Since it was based for the mental intelligence and physical capabilities of the occupant, it was a fair and welcomed necessity. The device was called The Zero System, and it was what brought Zero Systems Incorporated its rightful recognition as a powerful force to be reckoned with.

Heero eyed the letter that had been placed on top of a pile of his work folders in the passenger seat. Zechs hardly ever wrote letters to him, conversations were more his forte, straight and to the point. It would have to be important, considering the only other letters he had received from Zechs, throughout the entirety of their friendship, had been serious and once dire information. That one grim letter had been sent during the second month of Trowa's stay. That letter had been about Trieze.

"Why are you doing this?" Trowa asked softly, it had been a week since his release from the hospital.

"I'm not some whore that you can pick up off the street and claim." Trowa sneered at the back of the silent stranger. Silence was the only response that he was awarded with. Giving a frustrated hiss, he left the room and wandered into the living room of the oversized apartment. Rummaging through some of the magazines and papers stashed along the side of the coffee table, he gave a startled look at the cover of one of the magazines. The main story of this business magazine was titled "Zero Systems: Too good to be true?" However it wasn't the device pictured on the front cover that drew Trowa's interest. It was the person wearing the device that caused Trowa to storm back into the stranger's office.

"Heero Yuy?" Trowa asked calmly, watching as the stranger turned to face him, a look of curiosity gracing his normally impassive face. Shoving the magazine at him, Trowa gave a low growl.

"Prince of Publicity," Trowa accused, "You're using me to get to the media, 'Zero Systems Incorporated's CEO Rescues Beaten Teenager.' That's the plan isn't it? To get me into some good healthy condition and then send this story to the press and watch as the mysterious genius turns into a compassionate hero?" Trowa's eyes narrowed, as did Heero's agitated scowl.

"It ain't happening." Trowa finished as he turned and fled the room, storming toward the front door.

"Baka, oh yes, I saved you in order to gain more fucking publicity." Heero growled as he entered the living room after the retreating teen.

"I'm just some attention craving—rich snob! Is that what you think of me?" Heero caught Trowa's eyes in a level glare. Watching as Trowa flicked his eyes away in a submissive move.

"I don't think that." Trowa said softly.

Heero gave a frustrated sigh.

"Don't act like that! Yell at me some more if you like, but don't act like I'm about to hit you." Heero stressed, "I told you I wouldn't hurt you at the hospital, you remember that don't you?"

"I would never hurt you." He stated honestly.

"Then why are you doing all this? Putting up with me, paying my medical bills?" Trowa asked, a bit apprehensively.

"What do you want in return?" he asked wearily.

"Nothing," Heero declared simply. "I was just trying to help you." He turned his back, addressing the living room.

"I told you, you were welcome to stay until you were ready to get back up on your feet, I'm not binding you here. You're free to come and go as you please." He gave a brief glance at Trowa before heading back down the hall to his office and closing the door.

When Heero emerged from the office later that evening, Trowa was nowhere to be found. Accepting that he had run the boy off, he began preparing a meal for himself. It was close to midnight and though he had long since given up on sleep, he couldn't help but strain his ears for the sounds of another occupant in the house. He had already driven himself into an agitated state, frustrated that he couldn't let go of the hope that Trowa would come back.

The sound of the front door opening and closing, sent Heero out of his bed and to his door, listening intently as footsteps stopped right outside his bedroom door. He didn't breathe, nor did he make any indication of moving. He heard the doorknob turn softly and stop. He was tempted to open the door, but felt compelled to stay in one place. They stayed like that for a good half hour. He knew it was Trowa, there was no doubt in his mind that it was.

He wanted desperately to open the door and face him, to tell him that he wasn't using him for publicity, or that he was a selfish incompetent person that would be unable to help Trowa deal with his problems and help him move on. But in the end, he heard the retreating footsteps fade down the hall.

It confused Heero to know end, why he felt so strongly about the boy. He didn't know Trowa. They were both strangers to each other. So why did he take him in?

_It's because he was trapped like me. _His mind supplied in a moment of reflection.

He was getting close to the apartment now. Hopefully Trowa's illness hadn't gotten worse while he was away, if they were lucky Trowa would be well within the week. He didn't have to worry about Trowa as much as he had before. He was fully aware that Duo would take care of him. That much was for certain.

As Heero made his way up the steps to the apartment building, he was slightly taken aback at the sight of a lone figure waiting patiently at the front of the glass entrance door.

"Miss Relena?" Heero asked curiously as his thoughts trailed back to the letter now secured in his pocket. _Is Zechs all right?_ Came the more concerned thought.

"Ah, Mr. Yuy. I'm so glad I was able to catch you, especially on such short notice." Relena addressed him politely.

"Is everything all right with you and your brother?" Heero asked formally, taking on a tone that he often used when consulting with business associates.

"We're both doing splendid, though Milliardo is so caught up in his work most of the time." She smiled at him. "But here I am going on about such trivial matters, let me explain my abrupt visit, shall we?" She nodded toward the door.

"Certainly." Heero answered, moving ahead of her and sliding the insert key, stepping back as the door swung open automatically.

"Such a quaint little building, it really seems quite pleasant." Relena commented as she allowed Heero to direct the way to his apartment.

"Miss Relena, I must confess that I was not expecting any visitor's and I really must tend to my two house guests first. One of them has fallen ill and I must give him his medication before we can converse of your motive for coming here." Heero took out the keys and unlocked the door, stepping back to allow his guest to enter first.

"It will be of no problem at all, shall I wait in the kitchen?" Relena eyed the living room slowly as she turned toward Heero.

"Wherever you would feel more comfortable, if you would like, you can wait in here, the chair next to the couch is quite comfortable." Heero replied softly as he glanced down the hall. The bedroom door was closed, and no light seeped through the door.

_Where are they?_ Heero thought anxiously, before walking into the kitchen, unconcerned about his guest's lingering presence.

"They aren't here?" Relena voiced from behind him, her high heels clicking against the hardwood floor in a fluid motion. Her posture graceful while her stride was light and deliberate.

_Like Trowa._ His mind supplied. They both held a refined air about them. Something Heero had not expected when he had first started observing Trowa. Relena however had not surprised him, though she did seem quite different from her brother. While Zechs was reformed and serious, he also held a light sense of humor. Relena on the other hand, was polite, confident, and reticent.

"It would seem that way." He murmured, scanning the counters for a note. Trowa wouldn't have left without a note.

"However I feel it would be as good a time as any to state your business." He turned to find that Relena had set her gaze on Duo's black hooded sweatshirt. He'd never seen Duo leave the apartment without it. If the sweatshirt was there and there was no note, they had to either be in the apartment or somewhere in the building.

"I came to formerly invite you to a small dinner back at the abode." She stated, eyes never straying from the discarded hoodie. "Of course your two houseguests are invited as well, would next Saturday work for you?"

Heero shifted, "Does Zechs know about this?" He asked.

"What he doesn't know won't hurt him, Mr. Yuy." She smiled slowly, her next words cut with precision. "7'oclock sharp, I'll be expecting you." She turned to leave.

"By the way, I do hope Trowa will be able to attend." Her voice was clipped by the click of the door as it closed behind her. Leaving Heero stunned by the revelation of her brusque departure.

"Up here, it feels like a separation from reality." Trowa called to Duo as he swung his legs over the side of the flat roof of the apartment complex.

"How so?" Duo asked as he sat next to Trowa, back turned from the view of the city. The darkened colony lighted by dazzling lights of the nightlife and all of its plentiful activities.

"Because when you look up at the sky, you truly see just how caged you really are. There's nothing but metal casings that engulf this entire colony. Everything is controlled, preplanned, and set. As much as you feel like you're in control of your life and freedom, you see just how easily someone or something could snatch it away. We're trapped here unless we take a shuttle and leave. If something were to set off the weather and climate controls, or worse, have something collide and break through. We'd all be sucked into outer space." Trowa leaned back, staring straight up at the darkened protective walls of the colony.

"So you're saying we'd be able to control our lives and freedom if we lived on Earth?" Duo questioned skeptically.

"No, not necessarily. I was just saying that if you really think about it people on Earth always look up at the sky and there seems to be no boundaries or limitations. We don't see just how confined we are. Here you can see it. Touch it even. How can you stand it?" Trowa's voice faded.

"You don't like it here?" Duo leaned over to look down at Trowa, catching his gaze.

"No, I don't like being confined to one place. At the circus we were always moving and never staying in one place for very long. I'm restless." Trowa admitted gently.

"I grew up in the colonies; I've never been to Earth. I don't see this as confinement, but I'll admit when I think of the Earth and how huge it really is, it scares me. There are just so many places with so many different people in it. I wouldn't know how to live in that kind of environment. I wouldn't know where to go." Duo watched Trowa's hand grope blindly for the tissue box that they had grabbed on there way out of the apartment. Blowing his nose and clearing some of the congestion that had been plaguing him for the past couple days. He quickly stood and swung around to face Duo.

"How 'bout we take a trip?" Trowa asked excitedly.

"A trip?" Duo echoed. "Where to?"

"Earth." Trowa grinned. "You can meet Cathy." He concluded.

"Aren't you forgetting about the last two weeks of school?"

"Nah, I'm not forgetting about them." Trowa replied. "We'll go after school is finished."

"We've already missed two days." Duo continued with a growing smile. "Ironic that I manage to skip during the days that don't count."

"I'm a bad influence." Trowa winked.

"Won't Heero be too busy to take a trip to Earth?" Duo asked inquisitively.

"Probably." Trowa answered un-phased. "Doesn't matter though, he'll be fine without me for a week or two."

"You mean we're leaving him?" Duo asked incredulously.

"Sure we are, it'll just be the two of us." Trowa smiled, "Besides Cathy will make it seem like we never left him."

"What do you mean by that?" Duo asked.

"You'll see." Came the steady reply.

"Earth huh?" Duo breathed, staring at the colony, unable to imagine the planet in question. Trowa gave a nod before pausing as he watched Duo's next move. Duo stood slowly, grabbing the tissue box before waving it teasingly in front of Trowa.

"Here boy, come get the tissues." He mocked as he led them both toward the entrance of the building. Leaving the roof and the colony's metal incased ceiling in the dark.

Heading down the stairs they made their way toward their floor, opening the door in time to narrowly miss colliding with Relena.

"Ah, so you're the ill one?" Relena eyed Duo and the box of tissues before allowing more room in the walkway for them to pass.

"It's not wise to assume things." Trowa answered in reply, before eyeing the closed door of their apartment.

"Visiting Heero?" He asked nonchalantly.

"An invitation for the three of you, once you're well, to dinner." She stated, her eyes lingering with Trowa's.

"Dinner?" Duo asked ignoring Relena's interest in Trowa.

"Yes." She smiled confidently at Duo.

"Zechs doesn't know about this." Trowa stated, before turning and heading for the apartment door.

"Incisive aren't you." Relena smirked.

"Hope you like it." Trowa replied calmly as he and Duo watched her petite frame disappear down the stairs. She left, taking the stairs two at a time, despite her high heels. Exiting the building she was unable to keep the smile suppressed as she turned toward the building and watched as the clear glass door mirrored her darkened reflection before answering.

"I do."

A/N: Well, I must admit that this chapter has been finished for about two months now; I was just too indecisive about this chapter that it halted my initial actions of getting the chapter out sooner than later. I know that I'm going to have a lot of fun with the next chapter. Hopefully you guys enjoyed chapter eleven. I want to wish you all a happy holiday, stay safe and have fun!

**Comments: For my 6 reviewers!**

**Lady-Frisselle: Yes, he will read the letter. And I'm glad you like how I've characterized the boys. I myself don't like how I characterized them, but it fits for this fic, nonetheless. I'm much more comfortable with portraying these characters in the style I'm using for Halloween Masquerade, than the current style for ISSH. **

**Jenihenpen: Yes, what is she up to? Well I'm happy I was the cause off that 'stupid grin'. **

**Cardcaptor Soldier: Well in compensation for throwing you off with the unnamed voices, you got more Heero time. **

**Ratlover: Well, I wouldn't consider them the same, but I like that you're enjoying Duo's flashbacks.**

**No One: That would be a shame, considering that this fic has about twenty nine more chapters to go, I really wish I'd be able to say that I'll try to update quicker, but these things are unpredictable. Especially considering that I'm starting a new fic as well.**

**Zakai: ****いそがしいですね。****Hopefully you're taking a break! I had fun writing some of Duo's flashbacks, it'll be good when he finally reveals his past. Don't really know when that will be yet, though. Try not to over work yourself!**


	12. Intervention

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: The Vines

Album: Vision Valley

Most inspiring song(s): Anysound

Artist: The Killers

Album: Sam's Town

Most inspiring song(s): When You Were Young

**Artist: Placebo**

**Album: MEDS**

**Most inspiring song(s): In The Cold Light Of Morning**

He had sent Heero a letter with the intention of letting his friend become aware of his growing infatuation with Duo. Zechs knew that Heero's opinion on the matter would be highly beneficial if he were to decide to pursue a relationship with Duo or not. This would also be his first romantic relationship with anyone since Trieze's death.

Indeed it had been a year since the death of his lover, and he was unsure of how serious his interests in the boy truly were. His relationship with Trieze had been one of true love, having been best friends since childhood; it seemed to them to be only natural to have developed a more intimate relationship during high school. It was clear when they entered college that their relationship was becoming more serious.

Trieze was a brilliant businessman by nature, yet he was also very rebellious against conformity. He wanted to leave the traditional expectations of his family and do something more invigorating with his life. He poured his eccentric style and passion into their relationship. They frequented clubs, experimented with drugs, Trieze's favorite being cocaine, and both decided to do this after college. So when Zechs decided to open a new dance club, Trieze had been all for the idea, he had even designed the second floor. "_Wouldn't it be fitting to incorporate the feeling of a classy ballroom in the middle of a dance club?_" Trieze had enthused with his trademark smirk. "_More like a mockery."_ He had replied in a humored tone, a true smile forming at Trieze's concluding comment, "_Precisely_."

He hadn't seen Trieze's spite as anything more than rueful sedition. So when his lover committed suicide, it had been completely unexpected and traumatic for Zechs. His best friend, lover, and companion had abandoned him and Zechs was left feeling betrayed and riddled with guilt and grief.

This had happened a couple months after The Count had been built and opened, so he was able to find some comfort from Heero. Though it helped to have someone there for him he knew he shouldn't become too dependent and look to Heero to console him all the time. He had been right in his concerns because only a month later Heero met Trowa and their time together was further limited. Zechs didn't resent the fact that a relationship was formed in front of him while he suffered from his own grief for Trieze.

For now, he could only anticipate another encounter with the braided youth; however he was more anxious about his next discussion with Heero. He only hoped that he'd see his friend soon because at the moment he needed something to take the edge off of living with his sister and hiding his normal behavior.

It was finally happening, Heero thought unnervingly as he watched the sleeping form of his lover. Trowa was slipping away from him.

He wasn't sure if Duo knew what was happening, but it was clear to him that Trowa's disorder was taking control of him. He knew the signs of malnutrition, the doctors had explained to him about the disorder when Trowa was still recovering in the hospital. Trowa suffered from a severe case of Anorexia purging type or Bulimarexia. The doctor he had spoken to had been unsure of which one, because of the similarities within both disorders.

In other words, Trowa had a mental illness in which he perceived himself as obese, had an irrational fear of food and weight gain, and felt the need to be in control of something in his life. Or at least this was the summary Heero had concluded after spending several months of research on the symptoms, as well as treatment centers.

Heero was already beginning to see the drastic changes in Trowa's attitude and health in comparison to a couple months ago. The incident with Quatre, Trowa's drastic mood swings, and the recent and unexpected bronchial infection, they were all signs. Even so, he couldn't just force Trowa to eat. The disorder didn't work that way. Trowa truly believed he was in control of this disorder. Possessing that power, after having been deprived it in his abusive relationship with Wufei, was something that Trowa wanted to hold onto. In Trowa's mind, he wanted control over his life, and this was a way to do that. Or so Heero had deciphered in his observations of Trowa throughout the entirety of their relationship.

What made this more frustratingly painful was that Trowa was showing no intention of hiding this from him. Heero couldn't figure that piece of information out, it was neither a plea for help, nor was it a ploy to wound Heero's feelings. While Trowa's actions confused Heero, he had finally made up his mind that he was going to have take action. He had tried letting Trowa do what he wanted in the hopes that Trowa would realize for himself that he didn't need this disorder, but now things were getting too dangerous.

And truth be known, Heero wanted to be in control of the situation. He didn't want his lover to be sick and he had even expressed his feelings to Trowa before Duo had come to live with them. He loved Trowa and he hated feeling useless and helpless in the face of Trowa's anorexia. Why couldn't Trowa see what he was doing to himself? Why couldn't he see what that illness was doing to their relationship?

Heero stopped immediately at that unexpected thought. No, he couldn't blame Trowa for not realizing what this mental illness was doing. However he couldn't help but acknowledge the fact that there really was a building strain on their relationship because of this. A strain, that at the moment, Heero couldn't mend by himself. What he needed was for Trowa to want to get better otherwise there was nothing that he really could do for his lover.

Heerohad spent his childhood in what he considered to be solitude. Having been born into a wealthy family, he had attended prep schools and entered boarding schools shortly after. He had no real connection with his parents, but that had never concerned him. His father was never around and when he turned fifteen he came to the conclusion that his mother was having an affair with a younger man.

When they had passed away, he had felt resignedly hollow, however it hadn't affected him the way he assumed other teens his age might react to the loss of their parents. His compulsion with having to be in control started from an early age, early memories set at the age of seven reminded him of his strict self discipline in all areas and aspects of life. He organized his room several times a week, always searching for the most efficient way to fit his daily routines. He picked up several sports, the most prominent training involved in several areas of martial arts and fencing. He lacked the care to develop social skills with classmates and it was the few who took the time and effort to get to know him that became his acquaintances.

That was initially how he met Quatre; in an elite all boys academy when he was fourteen years old. It had been his last year at the academy and he had already been accepted with a full scholarship to a prestigious college that specialized in computer technology. Though he excelled in all subjects, he was only considered a prodigy in math and science technology. Quatre was also gifted in certain areas, but not to the extent of Heero's abilities. He was also an empath, which had fascinated Heero for some time during their friendship. In some sense he envied Quatre's abilities with reading people, it was an advantage to be able to get along with people and make connections with people that showed potential in becoming future business leaders. In a deeper sense, Heero actually noticed his own social limitations with a bit of regret. But his need to stay in control of himself was too overpowering to allow himself to make many friends.

Quatre provided a friend who struggled with the same issues as him, who knew where he was coming from.

His compulsion manifested into a more time-consuming habit starting when he entered college. Once he had bought his own apartment, he spent hours cleaning and reorganizing the entire place, he even went so far as to reorganize certain drawers more than once a day. His refrigerator was divided in three sections, liquids on one side, solids on the other, and everything else was centered in the middle. It was a side of him that no one knew about, not even Quatre.

In his mind the obsession was a part of him, so when Trowa started living with him, he couldn't hide the obsession for very long. Surprisingly Trowa didn't do much to obstruct his work, whatever Trowa looked at, he calmly put them back exactly where he found it. Though Heero suspected that this behavior might have stemmed from his living conditions with Wufei, he was secretly relieved.

However it was inevitable that Trowa would see him for who he actually was, underneath the organized and collected persona that he presented himself with. This happened about a week after Trowa had proven that he would come back to the apartment on his own accord.

It had been after a stressful day at work, to say the least. He had been aggravated by some of his business associates decisions to pursue a campaign for a newly developed cell phone by a smaller company, which used holograms to project the image of the speaker. A lot of people held high hopes for this newly designed product, yet Heero predicted that the battery power and memory needed to generate the image as well as the conflicting issues with reception could greatly affect the popularity of the product.

Heero was adamantly against the campaign and didn't want his business to be associated with the product when the time came for the critics to bludgeon it to death. He prided Zero Systems' high quality technology, innovative and practical merchandise, and their reliability to the consumers. With that in mind, he had bluntly stated that Zero Systems Inc would not be correlated with shit, and had left work early.

Stressed and frustrated he had arrived home and had hidden away in his room. He had immediately taken everything out of their respective places and began reorganizing the room. About thirty minutes in he had begun to feel a tightening in his chest as anger consumed him. _The entire fucking room is a mess!_ He had thought in a panic as he quickly began straightening clothes, paper-work, books, and other accessories stored in his bedroom. He was so, utterly consumed in his work that he didn't notice Trowa knocking on the door, nor did he register Trowa come in the room when the knocking had failed to raise a response.

It was when he began sifting through a stack of white clothes trying to align the them from large to small, that he noticed Trowa standing silently in the door way. Embarrassment struck him a moment later, how could he explain what he was doing without giving away his weakness.

"Need help?" Trowa had asked quietly, eyes shifting over the neat stack of piles spread out on the floor. Eyeing it with a look of interest but not one of speculation, Heero noted through his embarrassment.

Heero stared at Trowa unable to think of a response, he had been caught like a child with their hand in the cookie jar. How would Trowa react to the knowledge that his perfectly collected appearance was nothing but a fallacy? It wasn't acceptable to be this uncoordinated in another's presence, it was unprofessional, and beneath his status. After all, he had been brought up in a world where appearance was crucial, presentation was a key in success, and by letting go you would have to sacrifice reputation. The wealthy were sometimes cut throat and selfish, and Heero was well aware of the damage that could be done if he pushed the limits of his own media induced confinement.

It was a known fact that Heero was living his life in isolation, tabloids, magazines, and press coverage all questioned his motives. In the media world, there was very little information on Heero Yuy, other than where he grew up, attended schools, and the untimely death of his parents, Heero was one of the most reclusive celebrities to date.

With the wide knowledge of his long-term friendship with media's favorite multibillionaire Quatre R. Winner of WEI, and the more recent acknowledgement that he had connections with The Counts' owner Zechs Marquise, Heero had become incredibly popular. He was considered a hot catch, wealthy and handsome, and intelligent. So it was only natural that Heero knew that in order to stay out of the media's eye, he had to stay hidden.

"Trowa, I need you to leave." He whispered as his eyes trailed down to the floor, only this time he didn't see a mess, he saw a small line of neatly organized clothing.

Trowa shook his head as he made his way closer to Heero.

"It's like something that stays with you." He stated simply as he went straight to the pile of clothes and kneeled down in front of Heero.

"Never goes away." He said softly as he met Heero's startled eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Heero tried to deny, only to have Trowa grab the pile in front of him and dump it in one of the open dresser drawers.

"What are you doing?" He asked as he got up in a hurry, "Trowa?" He questioned as the boy turned to look at him with a sad smile.

"You have the world at your fingertips, there is no reason that you have to keep yourself cooped up in this place and at your work — It's no fun." Trowa said as he closed the drawer, leaning against it as he continued.

"Wufei never let me leave the apartment unless it was to go get groceries… the restrictions drove me insane… That's why we should go out." Trowa concluded as he reached his hand out in an offering to help Heero up.

It was in that moment that Heero felt something that he had never experienced before. Acceptance. Not for who he was as the head of Zero Systems Inc, but for himself as an individual.

Recalling that memory Heero once again saw what initially attracted him to the seventeen year old. Trowa saw the world in a different light. He didn't need to be taken to expensive places in order to enjoy his time with Heero. As their relationship grew stronger, Trowa attempted to learn more about Heero's hobbies and the work he did at Zero Systems Inc.

It felt incredible to have a relationship with someone who didn't grow up the same way as he had, but was willing enough to try and understand him. With Trowa he was experiencing a regular teenager's view on life, something that he had missed out on in the past. More importantly, what Heero found in Trowa was a lover and a companion, and to him that was very special.

A/N: Man, I apologize to Sam Storms — I honestly didn't think it would take this damn long. I basically have most of chapter thirteen completed so blame that chapter for the delay. I just honestly didn't like chapter thirteen, so I decided to get this first specific side story out of the way, before I continue with thirteen. Looking on the bright side, I finally got some criticism with that last chapter. Remember if you love it or hate it feel free to review.

Beta's Note: I think this is a good story. Avel has worked really hard on it and the more you review the more inspired she will be. The more inspired she is the faster she will write. The faster she writes the sooner we find out what happens to poor Trowa and company. Lady-Frisselle

**Comments: For my 12 reviewers!**

**Lady-Frisselle: Well, I'm not sure everyone should, otherwise I'd be getting flames left and right for sure, lol. Thanks for everything – especially with my random timing.**

**NoahBluze: Ah, music. Thank you, I purposefully try to introduce great bands to people – hopefully some people may find the playlist helpful.**

**Darksaphire: I assure you that those questions will be addressed in the next chapter.**

**Jenihenpen: Made the wish list, eh? Well it wasn't soon, but here is a new chapter. Enjoy!**

**No One: Why thank you, I hope you'll get to enjoy them all or at least read them.**

**Zakai: Yes what does she have up her sleeve – next chapter, expect confusion. **

**Ratlover: Yep…it kind of covered your question. Hope you enjoy the chapter. **

**Cardcaptor Soldier: 'Nother Heero centered chapter, hope you continue reading.**

**Sam Storms: I really am sorry for emailing you with bad information – it just goes to show that I really shouldn't predict chapters. **

**Mashed Potato: I think I emailed you at one time. So forgive me for forgetting. I honestly don't remember much about the email contents so…I suggest if you're looking for an "in character" fic, to read either My Name Is Shinigami or Halloween Masquerade. Currently they are the only fics that I have the characters closely related to the personalities shown in the GW series. This is an AU fic, and I personally believe that it would be impractical to have the characters with the same personalities and characteristics shown in the series. Hopefully that explains a bit. If I'm not mistaken, I addressed the "contradiction". I think that pretty much sums things up, if not, email me.**

**TanyaPotter: Glad you're enjoying the story, keep reading.**


	13. Rebel

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2 (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Ghostland Observatory

Album: Paparazzi Lightning

Most inspiring song(s): **Sad Sad City**

Artist: The Sounds

Album: Dying To Say This To You Most inspiring song(s): Queen Of Apologies 

Artist: Miyavi

Album: Jibun Kakumei 

Most inspiring song(s):** Jibun Kakumei**

Duo had often thought that his relationship with Trowa was strange. They were close knit like family, but neither knew much about the other. Duo knew that he wouldn't be able to go on pretending that everything was okay for much longer. Trowa was sick. It didn't take much to see that Trowa was loosing weight, becoming moody and withdrawn, and was having issues with his relationship with Heero. Now the third one wasn't that easily recognizable but he could feel the tension between the two of them growing.

He honestly didn't know much about eating disorders, but he was almost certain that Trowa had one. It wasn't possible for someone to eat regularly and lose weight like Trowa was. Then again there were times when he hardly saw Trowa eat anything at all. He wondered briefly if he should talk to Heero about this, but he was fairly certain that someone that intimate with Trowa would notice something that obvious. In the end, Duo resolved that he would definitely have to speak with Heero about Trowa's health or just confront his friend himself.

Turning his attention back to what the class was currently studying he realized that ever since he met Trowa he hadn't experienced many torments from his peers, he wondered briefly if they were taking a break or if they had finally given up on him. His thoughts were immediately diminished when a rolled up wad of paper hit him in the head, and a couple soft chuckles were heard from behind him. He let out a frustrated sigh, reminding himself that there were only two more classes before English with Trowa.

If he hadn't been so certain that his teachers' would have it in for him if he fought back, his tormenters would have ended long ago. Duo wasn't weak and he had learned on L2 how to take care of himself. Initially it had taken a while for him to keep himself under control when the kids in his class would play pranks on him or vandalize some of his stuff – but over the years it had occurred to him that soon enough he would never have to see his classmates ever again.

What really peeved him was the fact that none of those motherfuckers had even given him a chance. When he was younger, Sister Helen had taught them patience and to give everyone a chance, she had believed that everybody should be treated equally and with kindness. It was the same with Father Maxwell, who had preached about not judging others because he believed that God loved everyone. He understood now that they had lived in a dream world filled with false pretenses.

The bell rang and he grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder as he hurried for the door. Apparently the pranksters weren't through with him, they followed him throwing out taunts and other offensive words that he ignored.

"Hey Faggot? Where you going?" A boy named Alex, who had been in at least one of his classes throughout the entirety of his stay at Burmens High called from behind him. 

"He's probably heading for the showers to jack off" His best friend Mueller sneered in response.

"Sick Fuck." He heard Alex laugh.

"So does that mean you're coming with me and making it and orgy party?" Duo turned speaking loud enough that some of the students passing them by stopped in order to pay attention to what was going on.

The two boys stopped, before Alex gave a disgusted look. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me, why else would you be following me IF I were intending on 'jacking off in the shower' as you put it." Duo continued smartly, "Obviously you must be interested in seeing something – if you're that horny why don't you two go to the bathroom and check out your own cocks. Unless you two are bored of doing that already."

Mueller turned red and Alex took a step forward shaking with anger.

"And how would you know, cock sucker?" He asked venomously.

"'Cause the bathroom walls aren't that thick." Duo responded off handedly as he started continuing to his next class.

A couple students from the crowd that had began to form around the dispute laughed at the remark and a few taunts were thrown at Alex and Mueller.

He stepped into his classroom knowing that he'd have trouble during lunch.

Trowa had just completed the third lap at six minutes and ten seconds, his sides were cramping as his head continued to chant at how fucking fat he was. To keep going, keep burning calories. One more lap and he could have water – just one more lap. His legs were threatening to buckle as he made the halfway point and then he picked up the pace running as fast as he could toward the white line on the red gravel track.

"7: 05" His Weight Training teacher called out as he passed him, stopping and walking toward the bleachers where his water bottle was perched on the side. Grabbing the bottle he shakily twisted the cap off and took a large gulp of water as he sat down and waited for some of the other students to finish. Listening in to some of the students' conversations as they finished and sat on the bleachers close by he overheard something that had happened prior to the beginning of class.

"Yeah, Alex was so fucking pissed – you should have seen his face, I mean I wonder what he's going to do the next time he sees Duo?" One guy explained to his friend who had missed the fight. "Duo has one sharp tongue, he laid in on them real good."

"Lets just hope his fist is just as quick as his tongue." His friend commented.

"Yeah" the previous boy agreed.

"When do you think this fight is going to continue?" Trowa called after he took another swig of water. The boys turned their attention to Trowa before answering.

"I'd say Alex would have something planned for lunch – You going to go watch?" The first boy asked.

Trowa looked down at his water bottle before smirking softly, "You could say that."

English with Mrs. Serton rolled around at 11: 30 am and Duo had been complimented and sneered at from more people that had ever paid attention to him before.

"Word on campus says that you grilled some punks speechless." Trowa's amused voice spoke up from behind him.

"It would look that way." Duo leaned back to look at him.

"What'd they bother you about?" Trowa asked curiously as he watched some more students filter in.

"They were making jabs about me being a homosexual who jacks off in the showers, because apparently being gay is one of the most insulting things imaginable." Duo replied casually.

"Ah." Trowa nodded almost to himself.

"Told them that if they continued following me that it might become an orgy."

"Don't you need more than three people?" Trowa asked as he winked at Duo.

"Like they'd know the difference." Duo laughed softly.

"From what I heard, they'll want a rematch at lunch and this time it might not be just verbal." Trowa turned serious, letting Duo know that he was concerned about the unwanted attention being directed toward his friend.

"Well, no one says we have to confront them at lunch, who are they to fuck with OUR off time?" Duo said in agitation.

"So where do you want to go to lunch?" Trowa asked as he leaned his chin on his hand.

"Dunno." Duo sighed as the teacher started to take attendance.

Lunch started out exactly as students had predicted. On the way to the parking lot Trowa and Duo encountered Alex, Mueller, and some of their friends, along with most of the school.

"I'd say that they'd make up an orgy." Trowa stated softly to Duo as they approached the angry looking teens.

"Well, well, I'm surprised you showed up, you weren't planning on going anywhere were you?" Alex smiled exaggeratedly at them as he spoke cockily.

"Actually we're going out for lunch." Duo answered calmly.

Alex and everyone else gave a glance at Trowa and smirked.

"This your boyfriend?" Mueller taunted.

"I don't think it matters who he is to me or not." Duo responded coolly as he made his way toward Trowa's truck.

Trowa had wondered why there hadn't been any true signs of aggression until he saw Duo heading toward the car.

"Duo." Trowa called warningly.

"Yeah?" Duo paused, continuing to look straight at the car. Apparently he had figured it out as well.

"Nothing." Trowa said as he followed, waiting to see how things were going to turn out once they reached the car.

Trowa unlocked the car before they reached it, and when Duo reached the passenger side he saw the first would be assailant come from behind the front of the car and rush at him. In that time Duo had opened the door just enough so that when the guy was just about to grab him, he slammed the door into the guys face. Turning his attention to Trowa he saw that someone had stashed themselves inside the bed of the truck. So when the boy had stood up intending to take a swing at Trowa, Trowa had in turn grabbed the boy's shirt and yanked him out of the truck only to fall on his back on the concrete.

Outraged, Alex's gang was about to retaliate when the principal and some of the other teachers came running out to see what was happening.

Heero got a phone call at around one thirty in the afternoon to inform him that Trowa and Duo had been expelled for causing a domestic dispute and injuring two students. Heero of course was surprised by this news, but had gone ahead and told his secretary that he would be taking the rest of the day off and had left for the school.

"So I guess now would be an appropriate time to announce that I've decided to buy a new apartment." Heero spoke casually to break the silence the other two had been holding ever since they had been picked up.

Trowa turned to look at him a bit startled. "Nande?" He asked.

"I don't think Duo would like to live on the couch forever, it'd be nice to have a larger apartment to accommodate the three of us." Heero answered smoothly.

Trowa turned to look at Duo who was paying attention with interest and gave him a smile, "You're alright with that?"

"Definitely." Duo smiled in return.

"Also you two can begin at a different school, which hopefully won't give you two too much trouble." Heero smiled.

"Can't believe they fucking expelled us." Duo gritted out as he stared out the window.

"Yeah, it's not like we killed anyone." Trowa agreed. Earning two incredulous looks in return.

"Sometimes I wonder about you." Duo laughed as Trowa shrugged.

When they arrived home, Heero announced that they had been invited for dinner with Zechs and Relena for the upcoming Saturday. Both had nodded, feeling it unnecessary to mention that Relena had previously informed them herself.

"So shall I bring dinner in?" Heero asked as they sat in the living room watching television.

"Sure." Duo replied.

"Whatever." Trowa followed suit.

"Italian?" Heero asked.

"Go for it." Duo said casually.

"Fine." Trowa answered more stiffly.

"Then I'll go order it, any preferences?"

"Lasagna?" Duo asked a bit timidly.

"Lasagna." Heero nodded before looking at Trowa.

"What are you getting?" Trowa questioned him.

"Chicken Parmesan" He answered.

"Wanna split?" Trowa asked as casually as he could.

Heero knew that if he answered yes, Trowa wouldn't eat much of anything and then he'd go purge it. A forbidden thought crossed his mind, unless he stopped Trowa. Heero mentally sighed, that would result in a huge fight, he was certain of it.

"Sure." He answered, he would just have to wait and see how badly Trowa would react later that night.

Thirty minutes later Heero left to pick up the Italian food, leaving Duo and Trowa alone watching a comedy show.

"Tro?" Duo worked up the courage to make the trade off.

"Yeah." Trowa replied softly, he could tell that Trowa was trying to stay awake.

"You'd tell me if something was wrong, right?" He asked expectantly awaiting Trowa's response.

"Just like you'd tell me if something was wrong." Trowa answered calmly.

"Something is wrong." Duo stated softly as he looked at Trowa.

Trowa not expecting this turned his eyes on Duo questioningly.

"What's wrong?" He asked concerned.

"You." Duo answered earnestly, receiving an agitated look in response.

"Nothings wrong with me. Now, leave it." Trowa growled defensively – it was bad enough he had to hear this from Heero; he didn't want to have to hear this from Duo either.

"You're losing weight, you're too thin to lose weight." Duo continued watching Trowa fidget in denial.

"I'm fine." Trowa said icily as he got up intending to leave the room, but Duo got up as well.

"Do you have an eating disorder?" Duo finally asked.

Trowa spun around looking at him angrily.

"No." Trowa spat heatedly.

"So when I ask Heero he'll tell me the exact same thing?" Duo questioned skeptically.

"Duo stop." Trowa suddenly dropped his defensive attitude and looked at him pleadingly.

"At the club that night, I thought I saw my foster parent and it scared me because I know that I killed him." Duo answered truthfully.

"Duo." Trowa's voice was strained.

"When I was seven the church that I had grew up in as well as the people I had looked at as my family were burned alive inside it by a madman. Afterwards I was tossed around to different foster homes where I landed in the care of a man named Trent – I never learned his last name. He took me and another boy named Solo, who was about five or six years older than me, in." Duo paused before gaining the strength to continue. Trowa deserved the truth.

"We stayed with him for two years, and during that time I had to watch Solo get beaten and dragged into Trent's bedroom – and know that there was nothing I could do to stop him from getting raped repeatedly. Solo was like a brother to me, he kept me safe, took the brunt of my mistakes and made sure that Trent wouldn't hurt me." He grabbed his braid comfortingly as he persevered.

"One night Trent came home drunk as hell and with a temper to boot, he threw Solo against the wall where he hit his head real hard, ya' know? There was a lot of blood but he told me to run and get out of there. I didn't want to leave him but I ran because I was scared that if I stayed I might see something – that I might see Trent hurt him more."

"I fled the room, ran down the hall to my bedroom and hid in the closet. I could hear an almost mournful sob to 'wake up' before Trent's voice got louder and more hateful until he was screaming at Solo to get up. I never heard Solo respond. I tried to move some of the clothes to cover me as I tucked myself in the corner of the closet. I knew it would only be a temporary retreat before Trent came looking for me."

"His voice was almost friendly even with the drunken slur, asking me to come out that he wasn't going to do anything. I could hear him getting closer, and finally he reached the bedroom – and of course he checked the closet first. He grabbed me by the arm so I couldn't run and pulled me out of the room and toward the living room. I asked him if Solo was alright but he told me to shut up."

"I looked for Solo but the only thing I could see was the blood from where Solo had been. I think I knew, even though I didn't want to believe it, that Solo was dead. It was when Trent placed me in the car that I knew that we were running away, he started the car and I watched the lights from the house and the street and the neighborhood fade away as we drove further and further. During the car ride I must have relived the moment when Solo hit his head over a hundred times, each time trying to figure out how I could have saved him, how this could have been avoided. How Solo could still be here."

"We stopped at a gas station and he got out, locking the car door but too drunk and panicked to notice that his was the only one that locked. I snuck out and found myself running across the street, some cars swerved out of the way, but caused enough commotion to gain Trent's attention. He started calling out to me as he started to dash across the street chasing me, I saw the truck coming but I didn't say anything. It hit him. Once I realized that his mangled body meant that he was dead I ran away and was picked up by the cops about an hour later when I wandered into a local twenty-four hour market store."

He noticed that Trowa wasn't looking at him, and took a step in order to grab one of Trowa's hands in order to still them from their nervous habit.

"You're my best friend. And best friends are like family – we have to look out for one another. I don't want to lose you. Neither does Heero. Do you have an eating disorder?" Duo asked slowly and calmly keeping his eyes trained on Trowa.

"I was diagnosed with bulimarexia or rather, bulimia anorexia nervosa when Heero had taken me into the hospital." Trowa forced out. "I was ninety five pounds when I ran away from Wufei."

Duo felt the world stop for a second, ninety-five pounds? Was that even possible?

"Nothing is wrong." Trowa finished, and the look that he gave Duo made him realize that Trowa actually believed it.

"I can't lose you." Duo squeezed his hand trying to get his message across. "You're my family now."

Trowa looked at him before pulling his hand toward him sending Duo forward and into a hug. Duo knew then that this was something that would only get worse, but they would just have to fight it together. He would never give up on him and they would get through this. As he acknowledged these new thoughts, he almost didn't hear Trowa's softly spoken reply.

"Always."

Dinner had been casually pleasant, and both Trowa and Duo had both poked fun of the entire expelling that had taken place earlier that day. It was obviously an attempt to get over how pissed and upset they were about having to switch schools and make up credits. It really was a big deal, they were both going to be held back, especially considering how long it would take to get Duo out of his old apartment, the entire process of moving everything into their new apartment, once Heero bought it, and then to enroll them into a new school. Considering that they had just been expelled, this might cause a few issues – but nothing Heero didn't think he could handle.

When Trowa excused himself from the movie they had currently been watching, Heero knew that the moment had come. He waited until Trowa had entered the bedroom before he followed. The bathroom door was closed and the light was on, Trowa was probably undressing considering that Heero hadn't wasted anytime in trailing after him. Not bothering knocking he opened the door in time to see Trowa taking off his shirt.

"Not tonight." Heero had vaguely planned what he would tell Trowa, but no amount of mental rehearsing could stop him from feeling nervous about how this conversation would turn out.

Trowa swung around eyes slightly widened as he took in the fact that Heero knew exactly what he was doing.

"I'm taking a shower." Trowa said calmly, "You two were watching a movie, go back and watch it."

"Mind if I join you?" Heero asked patiently.

"I'm not really up to it." Trowa spoke a bit more timidly. Heero noted that he still hadn't released his shirt from the death grip against his chest, which meant that Trowa was becoming more anxious by the moment.

"Sure." Heero prepared himself for his next move. Stepping closer he leaned in and kissed Trowa, mentally thinking it was now or never.

"Come to bed with me and I'll make sure you burn enough calories to compensate for dinner." It had finally turned to bribery.

Trowa looked at him completely startled by Heero's proposal.

"What?" Trowa breathed.

"I'm giving you an option," Heero paused briefly trying to make his voice sound more gentle. "We can burn some calories right now, or we can have a fight, its up to you."

"Fight?" Trowa asked nervously.

"Yes. One that would involve a lot of yelling and no purging." Heero answered calmly.

"Please don't do this." Trowa pleaded as he backed up toward the shower, it was a cowering gesture so Heero stayed exactly where he was. He would never hurt Trowa but he would, if necessary, force him out of the bathroom if it meant keeping the meal inside of his lover.

"Please Trowa." Heero encouraged softly.

Trowa shook his head negatively and dashed for the toilet tilting his head and willing himself to vomit, he preferred using his fingers because his hand would capture some of the vomit so that it didn't immediately splash up and hit him, but there was no time.

"Trowa! No!" Heero cried angrily as he yanked Trowa away from the toilet.

For the first time, Trowa actually struggled and fought against him as he yelled at Heero to stop.

"Heero please! I need to purge, please!" Trowa yelled frantically hand gripping the towel bar as Heero tried to lead him toward the bedroom.

"You don't understand! I'm going to get fat – I can feel it in me. Heero, stop it!" he cried.

"No you're not, baby. I promise you you're not going to get fat. Trowa, calm down!" Heero's eyes were burning and his chest was constricting tightly as he tried not to break down.

Trowa let out a few panicked sobs as he began to hyperventilate. Heero could hear Duo knocking on the door asking if everything was all right in there.

Heero wanted to scream that nothing was all right, that Trowa was killing himself by the day and he couldn't think of way to stop the pain his lover was in. Nothing was fucking okay.

"Everything is fine in here, don't worry." He called as Trowa let out a strangled whimper as he brought him to the bed.

"Shh." He cooed softly. Ready for the next phase that he was all too certain would follow.

"Why are you doing this to me?" came Trowa's accusing cry, "Fucking bastard, let me go!" He screamed. "FUCK!" he chocked, as Heero refused to let go.

"I don't want to be fat. I don't want to be fat. I don't wanna be fat." Trowa chanted as his breathing came in fast forceful waves.

"You're not fat." Heero stated. "You were never fat."

"HEERO PLEASE!" Trowa strained desperately, his body trembling as he tried in earnest to get out of Heero's grip.

"I love you." Heero whispered close to Trowa's ear so that he could hear it.

"It hurts!" Trowa whimpered. His body was already beginning to fatigue from the overwhelming emotions racing through his troubled mind as well as the strain from trying to fight off his stronger opponent.

"I'm sorry." Heero felt the tears flow down his cheeks, how could things have gotten this bad?

Thirty minutes later Heero found himself with a more rational Trowa who had stopped struggling twenty minutes earlier.

"I don't hate you." He heard Trowa whisper softly.

"I know." He kissed Trowa's temple, still not letting go of Trowa in case he pulled another stunt.

"I'm not sick." Trowa continued tiredly as his eyes began to close on their own accord.

"Yes you are." Heero breathed after watching Trowa fall asleep. A sick dread enveloping him as he realized all this had occurred over not even a three hundred calorie meal.

A/N: BEFORE ANYONE REVIEWS: I just want to make this clear that this isn't Trowa angst, this is what an eating disorder does to the mindset. You starve yourself and develop sudden and quick mood swings and become overly emotional because you're not getting enough nutrients to sustain you. The mere thought of gaining weight is the most terrifying fear in your world. You get weak and tired so that it is hard to function – this is where Trowa is. So no I'm not trying to have Trowa cry every other chapter. Eating disorders really do cause this miserable existence and they really do take away your life outside of food.

Yes chapter thirteen was mostly completed but it is now going to be another chapter because for the life of me I could not finish it. Luckily enough I just decided to come up with a new chapter all together and it has now fixed a lot of writer's block issues that have been plaguing this story from the beginning and has managed to fill up quite a few gaps in the process. I'm unbelievably happy about that. Enjoy! Feedback is always welcome, if you hate or love it just comment and maybe I'll improve?

**Comments: For my 11 reviewers!**

**Zakai: I'm glad that you're doing much better, having an OCD is such a horrible disorder to have to face on such a regular basis. Yeah, poor Zechs. Glad you liked the chapter.**

**Lady-Frisselle: I'm glad you checked out some of the music, I'd be lost without my music. Have fun with this chapter.**

**Pdfish: As the story progresses you'll get a lot more Duo focused chapters. Hopefully. **

**Jenihenpen: I'm happy you're enjoying the boys and all their torment. **

**TanyaPotter: Soon. I'm afraid that's about all of Solo you're going to get.**

**Clingy: You returned, glad to hear it. Have fun with the chapter and careful of those sugar rushes. **

**Darksaphire: Hopefully you waited, lol. **

**No One: Yes, I hope this chapter will be around when you decide to search. Awesome, that's cool that this fic makes you think that. **

**Cardcaptor Soldier: I loved your review, so depressing yet so interesting to read. I was thrilled to read that.**

**Ratlover: Well this chapter was done sooner than expected, only took two days…but then again that doesn't say much about how hard I tried to update this fic. Well at least its updated . **

**Shattered-dreams01: That's so sweet, thank you. I'm glad you're enjoying the story and I hope you stick with it. Well I did try but that's as far as I got.**


	14. Borderline

Title: I'm Still Standing Here

Author: Avel

Summary: Duo befriends a new transfer student who has just escaped an abusive relationship. Sex, ED's, pain, and love, Duo's life will never be the same.

Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I make a profit from these works.

Pairings: 1x3, 6x2, (past: 1x4)

CD Player:

Artist: Sia

Album: Colour the Small One

Most inspiring song(s): Don't Bring Me Down

Artist: Regina Spektor

Album: 11:11

Most inspiring song(s): **Braille**, **Somedays**

Artist: Alter Bridge

Album: One Day Remains

Most inspiring song(s): Broken Wings

**Artist: Blaqk Audio**

**Album: Cexcells**

**Most inspiring song(s): On A Friday Night**

It was getting harder. Harder to function and concentrate — to handle his relationship with Heero. At times he really just wished that Heero would end it. He knew that as long as he was able to wake up next to Heero he could feel a brief sensation of hope that he would have a future and that there might not be a time where he'd have to focus on his disorder. That if he stayed with Heero, he might actually have a chance to be happy.

He knew he was hurting Heero and it pained him. The amount of guilt pressuring him grew heavier each day — why couldn't he be normal? Why did he have to have this disorder? Why couldn't he let it go? How could he possibly let this go?

He was scared. Deep down, he was terrified of himself. People fear what they don't understand, and he certainly didn't know himself. He was a stranger in his own body. Sometimes his thoughts felt disconnected to him and he would question whether he ever knew himself to begin with.

Still he tried to avoid analyzing himself and his actions too much, because it only further exhausted him mentally. How is it that he didn't know himself, or why was it hard for him to associate the person in the mirror with the person in his head, or rather his character?

Why did he love Heero? How did they end up in this relationship?

Trowa assumed that it was partially due to the way Heero had spent the time and energy to put up with him and his many problems, both physically and mentally after the incident with Wufei. Heero hadn't asked him for anything, but had treated him as an equal, letting him have his own boundaries and not confining him. He hadn't pressured Trowa into anything but at the same time included Trowa and allowed him to be a part of his life.

When it came down to it Trowa hadn't felt physically attracted to Heero until he had hit one hundred and ten pounds, which had been possibly over a month after he had been released from the hospital. At the time that he was recovering he had had every intention of gaining a normal weight, because living at ninety-five pounds was painful and overwhelmingly stressful. He had thought that if he could revert back to his weight pre-circus, one hundred and twenty pounds, that he would no longer need to feel the way he did about himself and food. That maybe he could live without this dependency now that Wufei was out of the picture.

It was about that time that he became aware of how incredibly handsome Heero was, with his strong lean muscles; slightly tan olive skin, cobalt blue eyes, and dark brunette hair. But even so, that wasn't enough to make him crush on Heero.

The moment he started to fall in love with Heero was when he got to know more about him during the third month he had been staying with him. He already admired Heero's determination, drive, and the strange quirks that made him able to relate to him. However, it wasn't until after the first time he met Zechs Marquise, and saw first hand the interaction between the two friends that he noticed his feelings for Heero had changed.

He came to terms with these feelings the same night Heero told him about Zechs and his partner Trieze's relationship and Trieze's untimely suicide.

"_They were meant for one another, so I honestly can't imagine why he decided to take his life, knowing how it would effect Zechs." _Heero had admitted as they entered the apartment after returning from The Count's Club.

Trowa had felt the awkward tension after Heero's sentence, knowing that the kiss was going to happen before Heero had even leaned forward. It was like time had slowed and then Heero was inching closer, as their eyes locked, lips meeting in a momentarily hesitant kiss. And just like that motion was suddenly restored and the kiss deepened as it became more insistent and passionate.

"_I think we were meant to be together." _Heero had breathed after they had broken apart, gently tracing Trowa's cheek with his right hand as he leaned in for another kiss that felt natural to both of them.

Another question hit Trowa, rather abruptly ending his own flashback.

So what did he love about Heero?

Quite frankly, he loved being around him. He loved experiencing new and different things with Heero. He loved that when they kissed his heart raced and his skin tingled. He loved the way Heero would sometimes frown when he was annoyed. He loved the feel of Heero's skin on his, his scent, his voice, and the way Heero made everything go away for a brief while. He loved his sanity.

He loved to listen to his heartbeat after they had sex. He loved hearing Heero tell him that he loved him.

Heero was his first for everything that really mattered to him. He was the first person he was left thinking about when he was away, the first lover to have been introduced to Catherine, the first person to make him smile at the thought of him. It didn't matter that he wasn't his first in bed, or his first relationship. But he was his first love.

Wufei had been about sex and ultimately being lured into a false relationship.

Heero was someone he could rely on, someone he wanted to make happy. Someone that would be happy just being with him and that would reciprocate his feelings to the best of his abilities. That was what he loved about Heero, he didn't have to put on an act or follow a set script— with Heero he could just be. Thinking back on his flashback he found himself hoping that what Heero had said was true.

"What was that…last night?" Heero's words broke the careful silence that the pair had maintained since awakening from the nights ordeal.

"I don't know." Trowa tried to ignore it, even though he already knew there was no way of playing down last night's episode.

"You freaked." Heero stated; folding his arms across his chest absentmindedly, which was strangely out of place considering his back was to the mattress.

"I know." Trowa admitted softly, keeping his voice carefully neutral, wishing for the awkward conversation to end.

"Why?" Heero probed further, still using a casual and calm tone.

"I don't know." The air was getting thicker with tension as Trowa reluctantly answered.

"Yes, you do." Heero urged Trowa impatiently.

"No. I don't. So back off." Moving away from Heero as he said this, Trowa got off the bed.

"Fuck." Heero sighed irritably as Trowa distanced himself. Taking a different approach he took a deep breath before he continued.

"You're not fat." He switched tactics and immediately regretted the decision when Trowa's entire frame went rigid as he hit a nerve.

"I said back the fuck off!" Trowa gritted heatedly as he pulled on some clothes heading for the door. Heero quickly stood up from the bed, making it clear that he would intervene if Trowa fled the room.

"No, I'm not going to fucking back off. We're going to discuss this rationally and we're going to work through this. What the fuck do you think I've been trying to do for the last six months? We're in this together, that's what a relationship is. It's two-sided, so you're going to have to put some effort into this."

Trowa shoved the sweatshirt he had grabbed in his haste over his head before looking directly at Heero in an uncharacteristically aggressive action.

"What the fuck do you want me to say? There are only three things in my life, food, you, and Duo. All in that fucking order. I love you, so why can't that be enough? Why is it never enough? Food is completely unrelated to you. It's not affecting us. You're the one making this an issue." Trowa threw the words out in a harsh and callous tone.

Heero was taken aback by the off-hand admission. Trowa had finally spoken the words, but in this context it dampened their importance. However he was un-phased by Trowa's anger. He already knew that Trowa, by nature wasn't an overtly submissive person, like the demeanor he presented from his past abuse.

"Like hell it's not affecting us. You can't tell me you're in so much denial that you don't see how sick this is making you. Do you honestly think that I'll just stand by and watch you kill yourself? I'm not going to back off. The purging has to stop. Look at what it's doing to you. You're not the same person you were a couple months ago. I know that this isn't you right now." Heero's voice was strained as he looked at Trowa expectantly.

"I don't know anymore." Trowa whispered in an unsure voice. Remaining motionless, he watched Heero quickly dress and leave the room, unable to handle Trowa's response.

Livid. That was the only coherent emotion he was able to conjure up at the moment, when reflecting on last night's events. He no longer cared whether Heero knew or not, whether Duo knew or not. It wasn't something he would brag about, but it certainly was not something he was going to deny either. This wasn't going to stop, that was the only thing he knew for sure. He would never give this up.

"You okay?" Duo asked softly from across the couch, eyeing his quiet friend as he glared at the television in front of them.

"Peachy," came Trowa's terse response.

Apparently, Heero couldn't deal with what was going on between the two and had made his exit of the apartment that morning precisely two hours ago. Duo in the meantime had been left with his friend, or more like stranded, he thought in retrospect.

"You want to go?" Trowa said at last, still not making eye contact with Duo.

"What?" Duo asked startled, was Trowa suggesting he leave?

"You know, do you want to do something – like outside this fucking prison?" Trowa elaborated still not sounding all too enthusiastic about it.

"You sure you want to? I mean shouldn't we call Heero…" Duo saw something change within the demeanor of his friend before Trowa cut him off.

"Damn it, Duo! We don't have to tell him where we're going — he's not the dictator of our fucking lives. We control our own damn lives – I control my life, not him. We're leaving." Trowa finished his rant and got up off the couch and Duo was pretty much certain that he was going to dislodge the door, but instead Trowa paused in front of it.

Duo stood up slowly watching his friend awkwardly.

"Where do you want to go?" Trowa replied softly as he turned to face Duo.

Duo pondered the idea for a couple seconds before he answered smugly to Trowa's questioning look.

"Roof."

When they reached the roof and entered Duo just planted himself down on his stomach before placing his arms underneath his chin.

"So this is where my defiance leads us?" Trowa commented a bit sarcastically as he followed Duo's example, positioning himself to lie on his back, head cushioned by one arm. The warm artificial light of the colonies radiated down on them and for a couple of minutes neither of them spoke.

"You're a virgin, right?" Trowa randomly asked.

"Yeah," Duo answered quickly.

"Ever want to just do it?" Trowa continued to gaze up at the sky, like the conversation they were having was about the weather.

"Do you mean like am I curious?" Duo asked feeling rather embarrassed about their current topic.

"No, do you ever just want someone to do it with you – so that you'll know what its like to have someone want to do it with you?" Trowa questioned, not at all embarrassed with what they were talking about.

Duo openly stared at Trowa, not quite sure just how this discussion had come about. Sure he had had sexual fantasies about Zechs – but those had mostly consisted of making out and an occasional blowjob, it never had gotten further. But then again, Duo reasoned that that was probably due to the fact that he had never had sex with someone – therefore how could he crave something he'd never had?

"I lost my virginity when I was sixteen to one of the stage crew back at the circus." Trowa mentioned slowly, surprising Duo.

"It didn't mean anything but it felt good, so I decided I liked it. Around the same time Catherine forced me to take the high school entrance exam – I hooked up with someone from the audience who invited me to live with him. That man was Wufei." Trowa clarified.

"Wufei used to act like it was some sort of payment." Trowa paused in reflection, unaffected with what he was telling Duo.

"He shouldn't..." Duo trailed off when Trowa waved a dismissive hand in his direction.

"I know. So just hear me out." Trowa urged with a light tone.

"I don't think Heero craves it, you know? Well, okay you don't." He chuckled when Duo rolled his eyes, "I just can't understand why not?"

"I mean the sex is great – you should try it." He grinned as Duo flipped him off at the last statement.

"And he's amazingly good at it. Stop looking at me like that, I'm being serious."

"As am I," Duo responded. "This is a stupid conversation we're having. You should just talk it out with Heero."

The moment those words left his mouth, Duo felt the airy mood completely drop as Trowa was reminded of the issue between the two of them.

"Maybe if I have sex with him he'll leave me alone a bit." Trowa pondered half-heartedly.

"You can't fuck your problems away dumb ass." Duo growled a bit irritably in response to his friend's absurd comment as he leaned over to smack Trowa's head in reprimand.

"Sex is a good stress relief." Trowa countered as he pulled himself up into an Indian style sitting position.

"Speaking of sex," Trowa leaned in, in an almost conspiratorial way, "What do you think of Zechs?"

Duo already expecting something like this still blushed at the timing of Trowa's inquiry.

"I think he's hot – but he's older, rich, and wouldn't go for me." Duo summed up his conclusions in a friendly manner.

Trowa gave him a look that made him realize that what should have been perfectly valid reasons, had all been contradicted by said friend.

"Well fuck you for messing with the norm." Duo accused lightly, "Those things are supposed to not happen for a reason."

"And, would that reason be so that you'd be able to win this?" Trowa stated more than asked.

"Of course." Duo said indignantly.

"Well aren't you just full of answers" Trowa laughed, "So tell me Mr. The-World-According-To-Me, who exactly was he staring at the entire time we were at his table?"

"Heero," Duo didn't even blink

"No, he was talking to Heero – but he was undressing you with his eyes the entire time." Trowa smiled, "Here I thought I was going to be granted my own lucky eight ball to answer all my burning questions."

"Oh yeah, shake hard enough on the braid and get an answer." Duo played along, though he could feel himself blushing faintly.

"Precisely." Trowa smiled softly. "I think Zechs is great – he's a real down to earth kind of guy and one hundred percent gay." Trowa winked and then paused awkwardly; only this time his eyes were clenched shut.

"Hey, is something wrong?" Duo asked weirdly, unsure of whether he should be concerned or getting Trowa help.

"Nah, I just got a headache – It'll go away in a minute." Trowa said in an unconcerned tone.

"You're just falling apart aren't you?" Duo teased lightly.

"Looks that way, doesn't it?" Trowa finally opened his eyes and was about to say more, but stopped himself short and got up trailing close to the edge of the roofline.

Duo followed in suit, to watch Trowa's gaze land on Heero's black Navigator coming toward the parking garage entrance.

"How long until he sends a search party?" Trowa murmured softly in an amused yet cynical tone.

Duo felt a spark of anger flare up at Trowa's comment. Trowa was acting childish – did he really not understand where they were? What he shared with Heero?

"What the fuck is wrong with you, man?" Duo turned and smacked his friend's arm. "You've got a real good thing going on with him, stop bashing everything he does. At least he'd try to look for you – you know he puts up with a lot of your shit and he's still with you. Not everyone would stay, Tro." Duo looked at Trowa seriously trying to get through to his friend. "You've got to get over this." Duo continued, "You told me that you loved him. So make it work."

Trowa stared at him taking in what Duo had said before he started to laugh. It was a light chuckle that felt awkwardly placed in the conversation.

"What the hell is funny?" Duo questioned irritably.

"Me." Trowa smiled back at him as his cell phone began to ring, as Duo watched Trowa answer it, he felt the distinct feeling that something was wrong.

"Hello?" Trowa's voice was too upbeat.

"Where'd you go?" Trowa asked distractedly looking at the exit expectantly.

"And?" Trowa drawled out as he turned to wink at Duo.

"The roof." What the hell was he planning? Duo questioned himself.

"Will you catch me?" The tone turned serious as Trowa uttered the softly spoken question.

Duo gave a sharp glare at Trowa as he heard the pounding of footfalls heading up the last flight of stairs to the roof entrance and the emergence of a slightly confused Heero as he took in the two boys standing only a couple feet away.

"Just making sure." Trowa said as he let the cell phone lid click shut, looking directly at Heero with a small hint of a smile.

It must have been a mutual understanding between the two lovers because Heero only chuckled softly to Duo's disbelief. They certainly were an odd pair. _What exactly did they see in each other?_ He suddenly wondered.

"So what were you two doing up there?" Heero questioned casually as they filed into the apartment, Duo glancing at the clock as it read twelve-forty pm.

"Not much, dropping coins on peoples' heads causing mayhem on the streets — the clean up crew cleared about five minutes before you got here." Duo stated as he placed his pillow and blanket back into a pile on the couch before sitting.

"Figured you wouldn't miss some spare change." Trowa called as he headed toward the refrigerator and grabbed three bottles of water and tossed them to the other two.

"I mean really, you shouldn't allow people such easy access to weapons of mass destruction." Duo smiled as he sat down on the couch and patted the seat cushion.

"I'll keep that in mind," Heero smiled before glancing at the Trowa's retreating back heading down the hall toward the bedroom.

"Look," Heero addressed Duo, "I want to apologize for last night and this morning." Heero was once again reminded of how socially inept he could be, as he paused to formulate the right words to tackle the situation.

"Trowa…" He began only to stop as Duo waved his hand in dismissal.

"Don't worry about it. You guys work out what you have to." Duo gave him a knowing look, before turning the television on and flipping through the channels.

"It's still early, so I figure we'll decide on dinner later. You guys have lunch or do you want anything?" This, of course was only for Duo's benefit, Heero already knew Trowa wasn't eating.

"I'm fine; I'll just have some cereal later on. You go on." Duo motioned his thumb in the general direction of where Trowa had disappeared.

"Thanks." Heero responded shortly as began walking down the hall. Inwardly thanking and admiring Duo's ability to carry on an almost one-sided conversation.

Quatre stared at the phone in his lavish office, tapping his fingers on the surface of the desk indecisively. He knew that he shouldn't be thinking about this, he should be focusing on work. Turning his attention to his restless fingers he stilled them and swiveled his chair to the side to glance at a picture on the left-side corner of the desk. It hurt, it just hurt.

Being born the only male heir to the Winner Enterprise legacy led to certain disadvantages concerning identity. Quatre was born to play a role, to mold himself to his father and society's expectations. They certainly didn't fathom the idea that he might be a homosexual, let alone a gifted empath.

When he first met Heero it was the year before Heero was to pass out of the boarding school that they had been attending. Though he still had three years to go, having just started his sophomore year, Quatre had been adamant about befriending the quiet youth that had been in his dorm. Heero was one of those people who everyone knew but didn't bother becoming friends with. Neither was he well liked as an acquaintance because of his higher intelligence, he outranked the oldest students, and at his age it was looked upon as abnormal by the rest of his peers.

Quatre had tried to be kind to everyone because he had learned early on that being a resentful brat had caused him more work than it was worth. He did however learn quickly that being passive and carrying an optimistic front didn't go over well either. He was considered weak, almost feminine, and girly in his actions and behavior; thus resulting in the questioning of his sexual preferences. However this didn't affect him like it might have affected another student in his position. He knew how to quench the speculations surrounding him. He only had to act the way his father had brought him into the world to be, a professional, strategic, cutthroat businessman. However Quatre's cutthroat tactics were through manipulation and strategy.

Rumors at the academy stayed just that, rumors and no one really took them seriously. Quatre was well liked and quite popular because of his high status. Even so, this didn't mean that he had a lot of true close friends. Thus he could recognize a kindred spirit within Heero because they were both lonely.

It wasn't until he had replaced his father as head of WEI that their relationship went from strictly platonic to sexual. It wasn't until they entered the business world, both at the age of seventeen, that they began dating. It was a complex two-year relationship, Heero had been his closest friend and Quatre had wanted to see if they could be more. The outcome was that they both didn't have the time for one another and the fights that had occurred because neither was getting from the relationship what the other desired had caused them to end their relationship. Their friendship, however, remained strong through it all, but time was still a sufficient barrier between them.

That was until Trowa further complicated matters. Only a few months after their relationship had diminished, Heero had called him and explained that he had just taken an injured young man who he had found on the street into the nearest hospital. Quatre had had no idea that the frantic phone call would result in anything more than a weird experience. His interest had been piqued that his friend had stumbled across a life and death situation but that had been it.

It turned out that he had been clearly mistaken. It had taken Quatre by surprise when he had officially been informed of Trowa's existence in Heero's life. To him it had seemed way too early to begin forming such a relationship with a boy he barely knew, especially with an unstable person, both mentally and physically. Trowa wasn't a part of their world; he didn't understand the pressures and risks that could befall Heero if the knowledge of their relationship were to spread. It was bad enough when it had been the two of them, but now Heero faced the danger of the media slandering 'pedophile' and 'homosexual' to his reputation. That type of attention could ruin him.

Though he did see a major difference with Heero that he hadn't seen before. During their relationship, despite not having enough time, Heero had never really been that open with him and this was true for the entirety of their friendship; they were close but only as close as Heero would let him get. So in that sense, Quatre figured to some extent that he was jealous that Trowa had brought out the complete one-eighty that had occurred within Heero during the last six months.

Personally, Quatre had little to fault Trowa for, but the chance that his best friend's future was being jeopardized by their involvement caused him to look at the boy as a potential hazard sign. Not only did this bother him, he was also deeply concerned with the issues that boy had been facing. The boy had an eating disorder and had just come out of an abusive relationship, why not put red flags up? It was perfectly clear to him that with these issues, the relationship that Heero hoped to gain would cause him pain and suffering in the process. Especially considering that Trowa was in dire need of treatment. Yet convincing Heero of this was an entirely different ordeal all together. Heero was rational enough to agree with him, but that's as far as he went. He had discussed sending Trowa to a very reputable medical center that specialized in the treatment of eating disorders, but Heero had adamantly stated that they couldn't send Trowa to a rehabilitation center without the boy's consent. In all honesty, Quatre felt that Heero was being incredibly naïve about the entire situation.

But then again this was really the only knowledge he had on Trowa, the conversations he had had with Heero had been few and brief. Honestly he didn't know very much on the issues that Trowa faced. How delicate and unstable the boy truly was.

Having seen Trowa, his previous beliefs on the matter were only strengthened. Trowa wasn't healthy, the boy was still underweight, and his actions spoke volumes unto themselves. Didn't Heero see that Trowa was falling apart? That Trowa was essentially dragging Heero down with him? He was certain that the emotions he was feeling of built up stress and a deep lingering sadness were coming from his best friend. He didn't want to see his friend get hurt; therefore he had contacted Trowa's sister Catherine and had informed her of her brother's condition. Since Catherine was Trowa's legal guardian, he had left it up to her to take action on Trowa's behalf, this way she could completely bypass Heero's wishes. However, now that everything was said and done, Quatre was beginning to feel guilty about going behind Heero's back, especially considering what this might do to the trust Heero had built with Trowa.

Even so, Quatre firmly believed that he had done the right thing. There was a possibility that if Catherine stepped in, that Trowa might have a chance to fully recover with the right help, and then both men could work on their relationship correctly. Quatre focused on the picture of Heero and himself, taken when they were seventeen and attending a business convention. His bodyguard, Rashid, had taken it prior to their arrival when they had been in his limousine. Heero had been scowling over their required attire, complaining that it was unnecessary and what they wore was irrelevant as long as they attended. Quatre had laughed at his pessimistic friend and had spoken rather sarcastically that it might cause a stir if he were to show up naked to the convention. Heero had then leaned over and smacked the top of his head lightly before ruffling his blond hair affectionately. "_That's just what they'd want, another news spectacle." _Heero had replied with a laugh. It was then that Rashid had taken the picture, commenting that close friends like them needed to capture these memories while they were young in order to remind themselves later of what they had.

Rashid had been right. He just hoped that Heero would be able to forgive him.

Upon entering the room, Heero was surprised to find Trowa, half naked with a bottle of lotion, sitting on the bed.

"Massage?" Trowa offered lightly even as Heero stripped quickly, knowing that he had to act quickly or the offer might turn sour.

"What brought this on?" He asked, as Trowa began to knead the muscles in his lower back.

"Something to do." Trowa answered in a humored tone, as Heero relaxed into the sheets.

"Then I guess I should keep you unoccupied more often?" Heero smirked, feeling Trowa chuckle lowly in response.

"So is this your way of saying that we're better now?" Heero questioned lightly as Trowa massaged his shoulders working his hands down the lean muscles of his lover's back as he bent over to plant a trail of kisses up his spine to Heero's ear, nipping lightly in response.

"Maybe." Trowa drawled slowly letting Heero get up off his stomach and flip over on his back before pulling himself up to a sitting position. A small smirk made its way across his face as Trowa placed himself in his lover's lap.

"How can I show you that you are the most beautiful person I've ever met?" Heero trailed soft kisses up Trowa's neck as he whispered the words lovingly against his ear. He knew that they had hardly reconciled their earlier dispute, but for now it felt like the tension between them had eased.

"I love you for who you are, not for what you look like." Heero continued softly tracing his hands up Trowa's sides as he kissed him passionately. Massage all but forgotten.

"Though you are damn sexy." Heero smiled down at Trowa trying to reassure his lover's look of apprehension and self-doubt.

"You think?" Trowa asked in an implying tone even though he avoided Heero's gaze, it was a tell tale sign that Trowa was uncomfortable with their choice of topic and was most likely feeling vulnerable considering their naked state. He had learned early on that when Trowa felt unsure of any situation he was in that he would instinctively act cocky and sometimes over confident, but never arrogant. It helped him feel out how to approach Trowa at times, and also how to read him.

Trowa's arms snaked around his neck as Heero's hands ventured lower down Trowa's back, Heero easily dominating the kiss as he slipped his tongue past Trowa's lower lip and glided it against his teeth; dipping his tongue further into the warm crevices of Trowa's mouth.

As Heero closed his eyes letting his hands trace blindly across the bare torso of his lover he knew that this was how it was supposed to be.

A/N: This year has been one of the worst years, mentally for me. And I'm in no way, in a good place at the moment, but I don't think it will effect my writing anymore. It took me about four tries, but I finally have a winning chapter and a whole bunch of writing to work into other chapters. I'm starting right away on the next chapter, so hopefully it won't be such a bitch to work on like this one turned out to be. For those of you who have stuck with this fic through thick and thin, I really appreciate your interest in this story and apologize for the year of absence.

**Comments: For my 13 reviewers!**

**Lady-Frisselle: Hopefully this is still going in a believable direction. This chapter took four versions before I finally was accepting of it…hopefully it's not too bad. No she actually doesn't, I felt it would be easier to write that way. I'm not sure if it will actually come up in the story or not. I see what you mean with that one line… I did revise it but as long as people get the gist of it I'm going to let it go. Also I had to revert back to one sentence in the beginning, I see how it could work, but I think its implying a little too much, the wrong idea. Thank you so much!**

**TanyaPotter: Glad you enjoyed it, if you're still reading, sorry for the wait.**

**Jenihenpen: I feel absolutely horrible that you reread it and had to wait for this chapter, I can't promise anything but I already have a good start on the next chapter, so hopefully this is a good sign.**

**No One: That is one of the sorriest shit I've ever read. I hope that you won't take things like that seriously. Anorexia Nervosa, as well as other eating disorders, is a mental illness that shouldn't be taken as lightly as that pathetic story. Hope you stumble across this fic again, sometime. **

**Reecey-Girl: Well I'm glad you've enjoyed the story up to however far you got. **

**Maya: I know, I didn't update soon, but I put a lot of effort into this chapter. Hope you continue reading.**

**Blissful Trinity: I hope you continue reading. I love 'em both too! Though, it really doesn't seem like it…considering what's happening in the story.**

**Blissful Trinity: Yes continue. I'm a dork, what can I say?**

**Blissful Trinity: Answers coming very shortly. **

**Zekesbabe: That's interesting that you don't think they're in love, haven't heard that yet. Maybe this chapter will clarify a bit more of the relationship for you? Wow, when did you start writing this story? I'd say stick around and try to refrain from placing your own symbolism and meaning to the characters until we get a bit further into the story. You might change your mind. **

**Parker J. Parker: Thank you for the support, I'm worse than when I was when I started this fic, which isn't too good. But I've accepted this life. But this last year definitely has been the most difficult for me. Which is a part of the reason this story took so long to update. **

**Parker J. Parker: I find it interesting that you find this to be triggering, I never thought about it, considering I leave out more than half of what people with eating disorders face, I was afraid I'd lose readers, might gross them out a bit. I hope that this doesn't trigger you, I understand. Sorry for the wait, if you are still reading this. Thanks for the support.**

**Estelle: I'm flattered that you like my attention to detail. Would you mind clarifying what, or if, you have a particular selection that I could make reference too? I like to see what other people like about my writing so that I can improve. I'd love for you to fall in love with the rest, but this is a very up and down kind of story. **


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